Zeb: I mean, yeah, we’re totally enemies, but I would kiss you if you asked.
Kallus: What?
Zeb: What?
Chopper, in the background: HE SAID HE WOULD KISS YOU IF YOU ASKED
Zeb: I mean, yeah, we’re totally enemies, but I would kiss you if you asked.
Kallus: What?
Zeb: What?
Chopper, in the background: HE SAID HE WOULD KISS YOU IF YOU ASKED
@agentloth-cat 🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣🥰
Okay so picture this:
Kallus and Zeb are on a mission together, Kallus does something clever to save the day. But suddenly troopers break down the door and storm the room. As they fight side by side together, Zeb catches Kal's eye, and before he can stop himself he blurts out
Zeb: Hey Kal! Marry me?*throws a storm trooper*
Kallus: Sure. Like now, or later? *shoots a Trooper inches behind Zeb*
Zeb *not fully comprehending what he just said, or the fact that Kal just just said yes*: um, later. But not much later.
Kallus: Okay sounds good.
Storm Trooper: what the hell-*Zeb smashes his face*
*they passionately make out for a few minutes before leaving*
And scene.
Then they spar. And then kiss. And.....
Kallus: I can never tell whether you’re insulting me or flirting with me.
Zeb: If it’s any consolation, neither can I.
🤣🤣🤣
Pryce: I heard an interesting rumor today.
Kallus: Just one?
Kallus: I started at least twelve.
*Kallus banging phone on the table out of aggression*
Zeb: Hey, don’t be mean to the phone. How would you like it if I banged you on the table?
Kallus:
Kallus: I don’t know the correct answer to that question.
🤣🤣🤣
Zeb: If karma won’t fuck you, I will.
Kallus: Is this a pickup line or a threat?
Zeb: Both.
🤣🤣🤣
*Zeb kisses Kallus softly*
Sabine: Wait… didn’t you two hate each other?
Zeb: Oh, you’re right.
*Zeb kisses Kallus aggressively*
Kallus: I don’t know why everyone is so scared of you, no one’s ever treated me as kindly as you do!
Zeb: ….That’s…. actually really depressing…. I hope you understand that I am now legally required to keep you.
Zeb: this is Kallus
Hera: we know
Zeb: we are keeping him
Sabine: why?
Zeb: *repeats the above conversation*
Kanan: we’re keeping him
^^^^ 100% Canon. Nice add, @thatonegreyghost 🥰
Kallus: I don’t know why everyone is so scared of you, no one’s ever treated me as kindly as you do!
Zeb: ….That’s…. actually really depressing…. I hope you understand that I am now legally required to keep you.
Ezra: Welcome to Rebellion! Please leave your sanity and common sense at the door.
Kallus: Won’t I need those?
Ezra: Not anymore.
🤣🤣🤣
Kallus: Zeb and I have agreed to never go to bed angry at each other.
Zeb: We’ve been awake since Friday.
Kallus: Well IF SOMEONE WOULD JUST ADMIT THEY WERE WRONG-
🤣🤣🤣
Kallus: Everyone! I would just like to announce that Zeb and I are no longer friends.
Zeb: That is the worst possible way to tell people we’re dating.
🤣🤣🤣
Kallus: What’s it like being part of the Ghost crew?
Zeb: Picture the most well-behaved, civilized, quiet, organized people you can.
Kallus: Okay.
Zeb: Okay, now throw that out the window.
Pretty much 🤣
Zeb: Kallus and I-
Sabine: Are getting married?
Zeb: No, we-
Hera, pulling out a giant binder: Sit down, we’ve planned out the entire thing.
—
Kallus: 250 guests. You know what that means.
Zeb: Great party.
Kallus: 250 potential threats.
—
Zeb: So. How bad is Kallus freaking out?
Hera: Oh, he’s fine.
Zeb: Really?
Hera: Yes, he’s fine.
*Sabine and Chopper trying to stop Kallus from leaving out a window.*
Kallus: I have a better tie at home! It’s cornflower blue. It’s cornflower blue!
—
Thrawn: Kalluzeb wedding!
Zeb: You’re alive!?
Kallus: Better question, who invited you?
Thrawn, offended: First off, you can’t kill me. Second, I invited myself.
—
*Ezra walks up to the microphone, taps the mic, everyone smiles, ready for the speech he’s about to give*
Ezra: If anyone doesn’t want their cake, please pass it to me.
—
Hera: I want you to know that I used to think no man in the Galaxy was good enough for Zeb.
*Kallus smiles*
Hera: And I still think that.
—
Ezra: After all, we are only human beans.
Sabine: And together we shall rice.
Chopper: Lettuce pray.
Hera: Ramen.
Zeb tearing up: That was so beautiful.
Kallus: What did I just witness?
—
Kallus: Zeb has been staring at me for a while, do you think he likes me?
Chopper:
Chopper: This is literally your wedding.
—
Zeb: You told me you wanted to attend a wedding with me.
Kallus: I did.
Zeb: This isn’t what I had in mind.
Priest: Do you take this man-
Kallus: I do.
Zeb:
—
Priest: And do you, Zeb, take Kallus, to be your lawfully wedded husband?
Zeb: I scooby-dooby-do
Kallus, to the Priest: Is it too early for a divorce?
—
Kallus: What the hell were you thinking?
Zeb: ISN’T RELEASING BIRDS AT A WEDDING SUPPOSED TO BE ROMANTIC?
Kallus: You released OSTRICHES!
Sabine: Do you mind if I slyly mention that you’re single?
Kallus: Do not do that.
Sabine: You won’t even notice!
Zeb entering: Guys, you wanted to see me again?
Sabine: Kallus’s single.
Kallus: …