I’m reading up on chocolate frog cards in the Harry Potter universe, for reasons, and-
“Came up with the ever changing floor plan.”
Really, Ravenclaw? Really?
“You know what this school needs? To not make any sense-”
“Rowena, I don’t think-”
“Exactly, you don’t think. I’m brilliant and this is perfect. Moving staircases, walls that think they’re doors-”
“But how will the students get to class?”
“They’ll have to figure it out.”
“…”
“Everyday. They will figure it out everyday. My students will live in a tower and navigate these stairs every time.”
“The stairs move! This doesn’t seem safe…I think I’ll put my common room in the basement, Rowena.”
“Ditto. I think the dungeons would be safer…”
“…My kids will brave these stairs. I’ll take the other tower.”
#Rowena snipes that ‘cunning’ means Salazar’s students should be able to handle the moving architecture#Salazar snipes back that ‘cunning’ means knowing when and how to avoid unnecessary bullshit#meanwhile Godric is just yelling PARKOUR! and Rowena is all That’s Not What I Meant#Helga would like her students to make it to class on time and without any broken bones#ninety percent of the reliable secret passages were a team effort by Helga and one of the others#to make sure the house elves could get around all right (via @mzminola)
#i feel like the collaboration was probably hufflepuff and slytherin#in the only time they ever worked together#helga: students and house elves can move safely!#salazar: more places to hide snakes#salazar is like we should make these accessible to people with no legs#helga is like i mean i agree but why are you being so nice about this#salazar is like no reason hey I’m just gonna make some of these rely on snake language for fun#do you think a fifty foot snake would fit in this passage asking for a friend (via @dinosauriaawesome)
i’m literally crying this is 100% what happened
(hey tumblr please don’t delete the previous people’s comments like you did the last time i added someone’s tags to a post mmkay)