I wish we saw more casual diversity among Vulcans in regards to... well, everything: fashion, art, history, geography, language, religion and philosophy, occupations, familial units, and logical styles and emotional management, and so on. The monoculture that "Star Trek" tends towards is both unrealistic and kind of boring.

(I think that my ideal "Star Trek" show would have a minimum of two matching non-humans in the main crew who are from opposite sides of their planet; these two alien coworkers have almost NOTHING in common. It immediately creates compelling character dynamics.)

Anyway, even within the specific Surakian Logic sect that Spock and his family seem to belong to, there's still opportunity for fun, divisive hobbies among this particular group of Vulcans. We can have judgey Vulcans looking at other Vulcans' weird, harmless antics and saying, "What illogical behavior," while the other Vulcans are judging them back for being illogical in their own opinion. Let Vulcans be REAL nerds: I think that pre-Surak historical reenactment is not an uncommon hobby, both casual LARPing and hardcore reenactment.

It's educational to spin and weave and sew your own pre-Surakian garments! It's educational to forge your own weaponry! It's grounding, like meditation! It is humbling to truly realize the complicated labor involved in fabrication. Even when they were surrendering to their emotional urges, you know, Vulcan ancestors were not completely illogical: they knew how to fashion a comfortable garment well-suited to the desert. Camping in the wilderness and foraging for food connects oneself to nature and settles oneself in the present.

Also, it's good physical exercise and emotionally cathartic to beat the shit out of each other with foam-wrapped lirpa, screaming at the top of your lungs. It's very logical. There's a medical team on standby, reading on their pads and drinking tea.

You beam down in the wrong part of the desert at the right time and find a bunch of scantily-clad Vulcan warriors (outfits depend on the chosen time period and location) (of all genders) shrieking and rolling in the dirt, until a timer goes off, and then the scheduled mock-battle is over and everyone helps each other up. (Depends how hardcore the group is, of course.) (Also, yeah, obviously, some of these groups have a hook-up culture attached / embedded.) Two bleeding guys who were previously punching each other in the face salute each other and part ways, one to go write a new archeological paper based on his findings here ("Fascinating") and the other to his low-level government desk job ("Most invigorating exercise").

If this happens anywhere near where people live, then the neighbors are shaking their heads and saying to each other, "I don't know how anyone could come to their conclusions and call it logical. Their foundational premises must be flawed." 😐 Some of them while closely watching the entire scandalous affair through binoculars and telescopes, of course. 🤔

Test that hypothesis if you want to but you ain’t gon like the reported data! (x)

…I now feel that “test that hypothesis if you want but you ain’t gon like the reported data” must be what a Vulcan dock worker might say before kicking someone’s ass in a bar fight.

"Test that Hypothesis if you Must, but I surmise you will not find the Concluding Data Agreeable" |:|

im really losing my shit thinking about vulcan childrens music and television. who could forget such hits as “3 is an appropriate number” and “walking in the street could lead to maiming or death”

the vulcan equivalent of the wiggles is just 3 normally dressed individuals reciting multiplication tables in unison

Speaking as someone with very little knowledge of Star Trek - I’ve seen like three episodes from random versions and I read Spock’s World - I violently disagree with this.

Even before I had such minimal knowledge as I do now, I thought that “vulcan” was a very appropriate word for them. It’s not that they don’t have emotions, if anything they have more than humans, they just run hard and deep, like volcanoes. You don’t want that thing to erupt.

So I imagine vulcan children’s TV is much like Sesame Street. Here is a muppet with anger issues! He spilled his milk and it made him ANGRY!!! Here comes someone dressed in completely normal clothes to say yes, that was indeed unfortunate, but anger is an irrational response to such a thing and not in keeping with the teachings of Surak; let us now explore different forms of meditation as emotional control, one of which includes three normally dressed individuals reciting multiplication tables in unison.

Can you IMAGINE the level of calm that would be required to be a Vulcan preschool teacher? These kids are strong, they’re fast, they want to murder each other.

This is the main purpose of kolinahr, it’s to create Vulcan preschool teachers.

Go watch the TAS episode Yesteryear to see just what little shits those “logical, unemotional” Vulcan children can be.

The Star Fleet Medical Reference Manual

Memory Alpha • Full text online

You know what startles me? Discovering that this manual made it into Memory Alpha. That means it’s not a “licensed product”—it’s considered core canon. And supposedly its creation was overseen by McCoy! “I’m a doctor, not a writer,” but here he is, writing a medical reference manual. Good job bro.

Features:

I think this may be my favorite of all the Star Trek items I own. It takes itself so, so seriously and simultaneously is so, so laughable and also super valuable for fanfic research somehow all at once. Do yourself a favor and go read it, cause yes, the full text is available online!

Okay, what clown marked this as not safe for work? In what world are illustrated Vulcan chests in a medical textbook not safe for work? C’mon, guys.

Tuvok commission for @bumblingbabooshka ! Based on their interpretation of tuvok’s babey 🥰

my absolute favourite thing about the kirk and spock dynamic is that the whole time you’re watching the show spock is gaslighting you into thinking that kirk is this loose canon and spock is paragon of logic keeping his captain on the straight and narrow when its very clearly the other way round. aside from the being turned on by everyone and fighting like an old-timey boxer…. kirk is just like.. quite a logical, stable guy. like yeah he rules with his emotions but he’s rarely reckless or erratic, even in situations of immense pressure he’s always calm and measured. sure kirk is unhinged and insane, but we knew that right off the bat. spock on the other hand tries to hide how insanely balls to the walls crazy he is by standing next to jim and hiding all his derangement with logic. i think the reason bones beefs with spock so much because he is the only one who has noticed that spock is an absolutely unhinged individual. (jim is too busy doodling <3 mr jim spock <3 all over his briefings to notice)

#kirk is like bones why did you pack the romeo and juliet death faking drug for mr. spock's wedding#and bones is like jim. it's spock. i packed every drug (via @maculategiraffe)

Spitballing with the fellas on discord and we've come up with a Star Trek character we want to see: A 200-year-old top Vulcan diplomat attending a function and laughing boisterously and slapping backs with everyone and then just relaxing into resting bitch face the moment nobody is watching him. He takes his job deadly seriously and studied parties extensively in the diplomatic academy. Every year he's brushing up on new developments in party theory. He knows every party nuance you could possibly think of, for the sake of intergalactic relations. Peace in the galaxy depends on it. It's weird but you gotta meet people where they're at, he thinks.

#PARTY GAMES WITH THIS DUDE……..#bro probably DMs (via@manyblinkinglights) Yes XD

dude probably wrote his DISSERTATION at the VULCAN SCIENCE ACADEMY COLLEGE OF XENOHISTOSOCIOLOGY on The Human Roleplaying Social Ritual in Pre-Eugenics War 20th Century Earth u_u

Bro probably knows more about Human RPGs than anyone in 250-350 years u_u u_u

Spitballing with the fellas on discord and we've come up with a Star Trek character we want to see: A 200-year-old top Vulcan diplomat attending a function and laughing boisterously and slapping backs with everyone and then just relaxing into resting bitch face the moment nobody is watching him. He takes his job deadly seriously and studied parties extensively in the diplomatic academy. Every year he's brushing up on new developments in party theory. He knows every party nuance you could possibly think of, for the sake of intergalactic relations. Peace in the galaxy depends on it. It's weird but you gotta meet people where they're at, he thinks.

Sek & T'Nia

my love for tits absolutely 100% includes girls with flat chests

flat chests are best, just saying.

A flat-chested person holds you closer to their heart <3

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations u_u u_u u_u

whenever they put Spock in all black it’s like. slut.

whore.

I agree. I do. Yes.

...That cloak. I ask you. :)

what a fucking drama queen

I love this scene cuz something so simple recontextualizes that Vulcan blessing, and Spock and Vulcan history and Vulcan society, so much.

We’ve just watched an episode about the violent urges and terrible power every Vulcan suppresses within themself every minute of every day; watched an episode where the anatomic INABILITY to control that violence has led Spock, someone so Proud to be Vulcan and so Disdainful of his Human part, to kill his best friend and here, (almost)at the end of things, we get “Live Long and Prosper, Spock”. It was never really a blessing. It was always really a Plea. “Find a way to live with what you’ve done. Find a way to forgive yourself.”

“I won’t.”

Gods above Spock needed Jim so badly. He needed someone who could always find a way.

We interrupt our regular broadcast to bring you ... Vulcan Kisses

I put together some vulcan smooches for you, because I love you.

Vulcan husband-wife kiss:

Adorable.

Vulcan mother-child kiss:

D'AWWW

Sexy vulcan makeout:

ooh yeah get some

Vulcan–wait what

what are are you doing

oh my god

stop

yeah so I don’t know what this equates to in human terms

but I’m pretty sure if you did it in public on Vulcan it would get you arrested

I am certain @dduane or @petermorwood will correct me. However, originally Vulcans were touch telepaths!

Not correcting you, but waiting to see if @dduane has any views on the subject. She knows rather more about it than me… ;->

…(looks the images over)

…I just think it’s nice when people find a way to come together. :)

also you can't tell me black Vulcans wouldn't sport this type of haircut. the geometric shapes, the clean lines, the symmetry? absolutely Vulcan to the core. straight haired Vulcans wish they could look this flawless. scientifically this is the Most Vulcan Haircut

A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.

It’s years before anyone explains it to him.

People keep gifting him robes with long white birds on them.

The fun thing is he would understand why people were getting him outfits with storks on them. That's a word, it's his name, straightforward. All the humans get him the same gag gift, but like, they're putting effort in at least. This is a genuinely nice outfit. Stork will be a walking zero-effort pun sometimes, rather than waste a perfectly fine robe.

It's fine. This is a readily comprehensible human illogic. Exactly the kind of thing he expected from moving to Earth.

Six years in he finds out about the stork bringing babies.

Stork has a good long meditation session about this myth, his name, his job, the outfits, the whole shebang (or whatever Vulcan concept is the equivalent).

And he decides he’s honored by it, in a humanly illogical way.

The humans are asking him to do what is after all his job, and specifically requesting him for the joy his name brings them on top of an already agreeable and satisfying task. He has no objection to engendering positive emotions in others. Harm hastens the heat-death of the universe, Surak teaches, so happiness must logically slow it down. 

Plus, Vulcans of his generation love puns. There were two decades of punning competitions in colleges across the planet. So when he realizes that he is a walking zero-effort pun, and that the humans also love the pun, he is all for it. He is the Joe Cool of the entire Vulcan population in his city. 

And via this pun, the humans are including him in a cherished and traditional myth, by casting him as the literal bringer of life and the expander of families. 

There’s no downside. Stork wears his robes, pins, keychains, and other bird-related tchotchkes with genuine pride. 

Headcanon ABSOLUTELY accepted. :)

once again thinking about how betazoid women get hornier with age and vulcan men experience more and more severe pon farr symptoms with age and how great (and lowkey kinda funny) it would be for a ship to have an older middle aged vulcan-betazoid couple on the crew who are so obviously in love and who clearly desire each other carnally at all times like gomez and morticia addams. you can't go anywhere in your off hours without them SOMEHOW being there making eyes at each other. at least once a week they go through this picking-someone-up-at-the-bar pantomime in the mess hall where they pretend not to know each other. they're definitely flirting telepathically with each other in every senior officers' meeting. everyone on the crew is used to this, but sometimes they do bewilder the heck out of people who are just visiting the ship.