Disappointed to learn that Ark Encounter, the creationist theme park in Kentucky whose primary and by primary I mean only attraction is a replica of Noah's Ark built with public tax incentives & that pitches itself as a field trip destination for public schools, has abandoned their plans to build an "immersive" Plagues of Egypt ride, but delighted to learn the Bible theme park is building a Tower of Babel instead

This wasn't a bit btw. The Ark Encounter creationist theme park is showing their strong commitment to Biblical literalism by building a new Tower of Babel

"Lord willing, we hope to build a reconstruction of what the tower of Babel might have looked like at the Ark Encounter." I mean the Lord was very much not willing the first time around. Like I know what you mean but when it comes to the Tower of Babel the Lord was very much not Ο Γιάννης είναι ο τράγος φοβάστε το ελάφι

God: I have used the Tower of Babel as a cautionary tale

Evangelicals: At last we have built the Tower of Babel, from the classic Bible story Don’t Build A Tower of Babel

okay you fricking gooberinos, it looks like it's time for mama to do you a learn 'cause lord knows American Public School never did. so basically, the thing is, [most racist four paragraphs you have ever read in your life]

please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!

do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!

Pros of having a brain that makes very fast associations: Good comebacks and jokes.

Cons of having a brain that makes very fast associations: that story about how you broke your foot reminded me of a fun fact about lizards.

still never fails to make me laugh when TV shows/movies/music videos/etc. etc. use snakes in their productions to add drama and scariness but then its. a ball python. which are arguably one of nature’s least capable creations 

when it’s TV bugs it’s always madagascar hissing roaches, which are basically like if potatoes evolved into insects

i really do think about this video every single time i’m on the freeway

Artemis Fowl villains be like “Hi my name’s Shea T. Pun, I’m a megalomaniac billionaire and I dump oil into the ocean and harpoon baby humpbacks for a living”

You know I’m right.

All humans are weak because we will all fall for The Classical Fan Art Pose. I like to call it the “Character nonchalantly wiping blood away from their mouth/nose with the back of their hand, murderous intent in their eyes”. I would go as far as to say it is indisputably the hottest pose you could draw someone in. In this essay I will-

Thought this was going to be about ¾ profiles or something but no you just came for our lives.

c. s. lewis making his jesus allegory a lion when jesus' canonical fursona is a lamb........toxic masculinity

Wasn't Aslan a God allegory? He created the whole world and all.

a first council of nicaea negationist? in my narnia shitpost?

I love this website so much.

Ah yes, the 5 love languages:

anytime i hear someone use the term “man cave” i feel my body sag as it craves death

its not any better than boy pussy tbh

may or may not be misinformed on what a man cave is

the biggest questions detective pikachu answered

no one but professional trainers has a full team of 6 in the pokemon universe because it would be a fucking gigantic hassle to deal with 6 animals, let alone different types that need different things

some people don’t evolve their pokemon because imagine having a fucking cat and then you can choose to make the cat five times as big and strong. would you do this if you weren’t battling.

Technically if your cat isn’t battling it doesn’t evolve.

That does however give cat owners a strong incentive to not let their cat outside, because realistically any cat that is allowed to roam free is gonna rack up exp until it evolves.

I let my litten out one day and a week later incineroar rips my door off and demands wet food only

The Vox article that I was interviewed for is up and running, and it contains some serious fuckign information about this whole fiasco.

Information that tumblr just straight up refused to provide to its userbase at all.

Unsurprisingly to those of us watching this website deteriorate over the last year, this full content purge and ban has been in progress for a solid 6 months. The date got moved up because of the child porn thing, but it was always coming for us.

Equally unsurprising: Tumblr’s management and ownership are absolutely destroying the actual staff working on it. The company has been hemoragghing senior staff without so much as a token attempt to keep them in place. So the drops in site quality are real, and wil probably only be getting worse.

Truly astonishing is the fact that apparently this crap was supposed to “double” the userbase by the end of next year. Boy, howdy, that’s not gonna work out well for them.

good luck with your plan to sell ads targeting a user base that doesn’t exist any more, @staff.

Then they’re def gonna let Tumblr die on the vine when it doesn’t pan out. It’ll take a few years but mark my words, this is going to work out about as well as when Rupert Murdoch bought MySpace and everybody left. Also, fuck Verizon forever.

Plz lemme know if you reblog this and it disappears. I have Suspicions.

I mean, there are already mutuals of mine reporting that they can’t see this post, only a “post was deleted"notice on my blog, and I’m the OP. So, whatever your suspicions are, I suppose mark them as confirmed.

i’ve seen it disappear about 5 times off my dash.