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#well – @zahlibeth on Tumblr
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zahlibeth

@zahlibeth / zahlibeth.tumblr.com

i've been lurking for 10 years so you'd think i'd know what i'm doing but I Do Not
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thedarknesseater
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polyamzeal
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weaselle

i have worked at two of the largest Ren Faires around, back when they were at their biggest, and... this is accurate in ways you might not expect.

After hours was wild.

there was so much.. stuff. The Black and White Lingerie Ball, and Squish-A-Tush (men signed up to have their asses judged by a panel in several rounds of competition that included dance ability, shape, squishability, and more)

there was SO much sex that one of the Ren Faires had to make a special rule canceling the public sex show that had started to happen regularly, where the people having sex would take suggestions shouted from the audience improv comedy style

So, uh, some differences, yeah.

#well#i don't know what i expected but honestly i SHOULD have expected this#people are delightful#yeah it's going in the tag fuck it
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reblogged
queerbuck
Content Label: Mature: Sexual Themes
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luulapants

love 2 see discourse about fic authors writing anal sex "wrong" and coming in with first hand (or second hand or ??? accounts) about how it ACTUALLY works as if there is not natural variation in how people practice and enjoy sex.

"they always leave out the cleaning!" RIP, but some people go nasty and like it. yes this includes rimming.

"no one actually does fingering first!" sorry, honey, YOU have never fucked someone who fingered you first

alternately, "with no prep??" mhm yeah some people are just living like that

"no lube??"/"spit as lube??" literally more prevalent than the magical lube stashed in every nearby drawer/glove compartment/pocket

"there's WAY too much emphasis on anal sex in slash fics, people don't actually do it that much, it's too much work" please refer to the guys fucking nasty with no prep in a bathroom stall for more information. they've done zero work.

"actually you need condoms even if you're clean & monogamous to prevent UTIs/mess" please explain to me the HERCULEAN efforts it took to get people to use condoms during the AIDS crisis if they were already using them anyway

"women writing fic don't know how to write anal" I should not have to explain that the vagina is in addition to, not instead of, the asshole

anyway, let's just agree that fic is not sex ed and there are plenty of people out there fucking in ways that you would personally hate

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luulapants

@punchedbymarkesmith​ god that is SUCH a good quote. also s/o to the time my friend went to a sex therapist bc he was having anxiety about/not really enjoying sex and the therapist was like “well have you tried fingering first?” and my friend, fully 30yo, was like “tried WHAT?”

Content Label: Mature

Sexual themes

#uhh yeah different bodies different preferences#there was a movement in fandom at one point that anal sex without fingering was somehow Impossible?#and all of a sudden there were a rash of fics where you had to go 1 2 3 fingers before anything further#well#let me tell you#it's not only entirely possible#for some people it's preferable#(fingers are too wiggly i don't like em)#ultimately though#fanfic does not have to be a) realistic or b) safe#it can be if that's what you want#but there's nothing that says you must only write common realistic expectations#so ultimately it's a moot point whether fingering is required or not#whether things do or don't work as lube#it can just be fantasy#that's okay too#(no-one in fic ever wipes the lube off their hands!)#i'm happiest when a fic writer is writing the sex they want to write#and not trying to stick to a particular guide or set of requirements#sometimes sex is just squishing the feel good parts together#it doesn't have to follow a formula#in my fandom era
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