Raven ⚢

Hi. So other non-binary labels actually already exist, like neptunic and venusic. However, every queer label needs to encompass non-binarity, after all, one of the community's struggles is to accept all types of people who are not in the chap standard, which is proven when we realize that binary genders such as “man and woman” are, in fact, , white settler views on gender. In indigenous cultures, for example, non-binarity has always been present.

This is why the “female sex” is the “weaker sex”, because the term “woman” was created with the purpose of submission. This is also why many lesbian women, even though they claim to be women, are seen as if they “want to be men”, as “predators”, because in the end, labels such as lesbian and gay deviate from stereotypical gender rules: you can only be a woman if you perform femininity and are attracted to the opposite cis binary gender, if you do not fit into this pattern your gender (and your sexuality, if you are a straight woman in a relationship with a trans man) will be questioned and you will be ridiculed.

Understand that me saying this doesn't mean that I'm denying the feminine and masculine identities, these identities exist, heterosexuality exists, but these identities are part of an oppressive-controlling system that assigns gender roles to people before they are even born. Sexuality is linked to these roles, which is why it's so common to see gay men being called “women”, especially if they are feminine but still men, and yet their gender is questioned both because of their sexuality and because of their performance.

And more than that: feminine gay men are called women in a pejorative way, but if it's in fact a trans woman, people will soon see the man they don't see in feminine gay men.

This is why non-binaryism is included in strongly binary labels: because cis straight binary doesn't include queer people. Lesbian women, whether performing masculinity or not, aren't women enough for the cis straight binary, so much so that in many feminist movements they're expelled because they're seen as predators. The same goes for gay men in their given reality.

I will go further here and also say that transphobia, racism and misogyny are also interconnected. If you’ve ever seen the news about black (cis) women being beaten by men for being “mistaken for trans women,” then you know where I’m going.

So, if every person who deviates even slightly from the binary gender stereotype isn't their gender enough, then why exclude non-binary people from labels if what they represent is part of the counterpoint of the cis straight system? In the end, no matter how binary a queer label is, it will never be binary like chap labels, and that will always cause us violence. And that's why non-binarity is on every label.

That's also why we've reached the point where we realize that no one is born with a certain gender. As Simone de Beauvoir said: “One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman”.

In my case and that of many others, I didn't become a woman, but I discovered myself as a lesbian thanks to all my experiences in a heterosexual system. Therefore, excluding non-binary people, who don't identify with any gender, makes no sense: because binary (which we know) is, in the end, a chap model that queer and racialized people aren't covered by it.

Another example of how the West is influenced by the European binary, just look at how Western people react to Asian beauty standards.

This is also why the label pansexual, for example, currently has the same "meaning" (let's say this for simplicity's sake) as bisexual, because pansexual at the time the label was created with the intention of including trans people, and nowadays we know that all sexuality includes trans people, and bisexuality, like pansexuality, is about attraction to either gender (pansexual is still used and is super valid, just like any other label, because of its context and historical value).

Finally, non-binarity isn't a "third gender", something mystical that doesn't exist or that should be treated as something separate, which is why its inclusion in both transgenderity and strongly binary labels is also important, after all "what is it like to be a man?", "what is it to be a woman?", "how does this directly affect my sexuality? If at all."

I strongly suggest reading the texts of Leslie Feinberg, who was a butch lesbian activist who lived as a lesbian trans person in the 70s, so you can understand much more how the trans, non-binary and lesbian struggles go hand in hand, and get to know both more of the non-binary movement and how the chap system works.

Making it very clear that none of this is to say that “binarity doesn't exist”, but rather that queer binary isn't the same as chap binary, and it's a counterpoint to chap binary that goes hand in hand with non-binarity, just as the binary we know also does not include racialized people.

Seeing the world from a binary, white and European perspective is limiting and excluding. What isn't accepted is transformed until you understand that it's not about acceptance.

I don't understand this new wave that trans men can be lesbians.

If a lesbian person (who already knows their sexuality) dates a man, then they isn't a lesbian. Why then should this be any different when it comes to trans men?

Trans men are men. If a lesbian person dates a man, then they, at the very least, doesn't see him as a man. When it comes to a trans man, don't you find this at least questionable?

Of course, sexuality + gender can cause dysphoria. However, this doesn't give anyone the right to invalidate and disrespect the entire history of a movement that has always fought for their rights as homosexual people, as well as another movement that has always fought for their rights as people who don't identify with the gender they were assigned at birth.

And if you know what homosexuality and transgenderity are, then you know what I mean.

History and context of labels are extremely important, they're how we can be seen and heard.

And of course, labels must be questioned regarding the binary that still prevails in their movements and the violence committed by them (which is why it's so important to refute heterosexuality and cisgenderity), but never used inappropriately.

Trans men are men, and anyone who is a trans man who only feels attracted to women and non-men, but doesn't see himself as heterosexual, there are other terms that were made to include them that don't disrespect anyone or even himself if will be used correctly.

And it makes perfect sense that a trans person doesn't see themselves as heterosexual either, okay? Heterosexuality is, more than anything, a controlling system that must be questioned and rebutted.

So if a trans person doesn't see themselves as heterosexual, not only is they within their rights, they're also being completely lucid.

I don't know if I've ever gotten this confused, but I want to make it very clear that I'm not transmasculine, I'm non-binary with a masculine gender expression, meaning my pronouns are he/him, but my gender is neutral.

It's important to make it clear that: there is no point in the trans community reinforcing binary discourses, about who is "real trans" and saying that trans is only "those who come out of the closet to god and the world, suffer everyday violence and did medical transition", 'cause in the end the people who really benefit from this are the cis.

Firstly, "only trans people are those who come out of the closet and did medical transition" is extremely elitist, and I don't even need to explain why, right? Right!

Secondly, being trans is precisely about questioning gender roles and stereotypes. From the moment you question and discover that you don't identify with the gender that was assigned to you, you're trans or non-cis, whether you want to do a medical transition or not.

Both those who are passable and those who aren't will hear the same things: they'll get your pronouns wrong, they'll use your dead name, they'll call you by transphobic terms, they'll ridicule you, make you a laughing stock, humiliate you, rape you and even be the cause of your death.

There is only one side that emerges victorious and humbled by this rivalry between trans people: the oppressors, those who hold power.

They want exactly that, for our fights to turn against us, for our attention to go away from them and for us to only see the problems reverberating in the community, 'cause this is how we distract ourselves from the real problems caused and influenced by them and while they continue to have the last word on our rights.

You won't achieve anything by believing in their conversation and staying by their side, at least a crumb of applause and a small group that's free to share any prejudice about the community cause they have their trans token to use as a shield, and this will only make it increasingly difficult for us to achieve anything.

Put the oppressed in the place of an oppressor and this is the most common result in recent times.

The healthcare sector is blatantly and shamelessly transphobic. How many times have I heard a specific teacher say that "if you have a dick, you're a man"? How many times have I heard her disrespect the pronouns of hypothetical trans patients?

Where I study, teachers teach you to be transphobic, but to keep it to yourself so that you don't risk losing your profession.

How can the area that should concern humanity the most be the one that disrespects people the most?

We already know that cis people hate seeing that trans people not only exist, but go through the same problems as them and others that are even worse, just as we also know that they make a point of humiliating and degrading us because they are the ones who have more privileges and they use this against us for the sake of their own selfishness.

And that's why I believe it is much more important to raise issues and challenge norms/customs than to fight within the community itself about "who is more trans than who", because at the end of the day EVERY trans person, with medical transition or not, you will deal with incompetent professionals who have been taught to be prejudiced.

In fact, sometimes the professional is not even a prejudiced person, but was taught to be and does not know that what they learned is wrong because they are ignorant and because they heard the "teachings" of an authority figure who gave they them training and profession.

As uncomfortable as it is to think that ignorant people like this exist, that's how the world works, especially when you're from a tiny country town where the nursing course you're taking can't deliver even basic study material that's current.