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you did well

@xiao-baobei / xiao-baobei.tumblr.com

star gazer and full time dreamer
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ramenrains

TW: Death

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Kris' mother and I just got off the phone a few hours ago, and I am heartbroken to announce this, but @blackfairypresident passed away today.

Kris was one of my dearest friends for many years and had endured his fair share of struggles, but I admired his resilience and his willingness to get back up each and every time he was knocked down. Whether he came to visit me in Greenville or we were going to concerts in Atlanta, we always had fun and felt at ease around one another. He had an openness in his heart that was unmatched, a sense of humor that could have you screaming with laughter even in your worst moments, and a passion to help those who had endured the same struggles he himself had faced.

That's why I'm writing this post.

Kris met many of his closest friends online. We provided a safe space for him to be his truest self. As such, he didn't have many ties to his real life on these accounts and kept them separate from the places he added work associates and family.

I didn't want you to be left in the dark. More importantly, Kris wouldn't want you to be either.

More details, including funeral arrangements if Kris' family feels comfortable sharing them, will be forthcoming in the replies or edits to this post. If you need a friend or a shoulder in order to help process this news, feel free to reply here or you can shoot me a dm whenever. I know this is sudden and completely unexpected. I'm still going in and out of shock myself.

Let this serve as an online memorial space in the meantime. Share things you loved about him or fond memories.

Here are a few of mine in pictures:

-When Kris visited me in December of 2022. He scuttled around downtown Greenville taking pictures of whatever he could, and it was adorable.

-The BAP Forever 2018 tour. It was notoriously a shitshow and they were giving free tickets away hand over fist. Kris posed with the extras we had to let people know they could come find us and nab them.

-VAV in Atlanta in early 2020. We were vvip and got to take this photo with the group together.

There were many more times we spent together that I didn't commemorate with photographs, but now I wish I had. The last time he and I were together for Bang Yongguk in 2023, I mentioned he, Jun and I should take group pictures and we collectively forgot. I'm sure I have some on Snapchat on an old phone somewhere, and I'll go digging probably later today.

I love you, Kris, and I'm so sorry this happened the way it did. I know how hard you were fighting for the life you deserved. I love you I love you I love you. I love you. I love you. I'm grateful that this was one of the last things I said to you, so there was never any doubt that's how I felt.

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kibumkim

Oliver then proceeded to detail how with $50 and knowledge of the law he was able to successfully apply online to create a debt buying company named “Central Asset Recovery Professionals,” or as Oliver put it, “CARP” named after “a bottom-feeding fish.”

After setting up a rudimentary website for CARP, the satirical, but still real company was offered a $15 million package of medical debt for $60,000.

Oliver explained that the debt was out of statute, which means it is the kind of debt that a collector can only continue to collect, but not sue the debtor for.

Then, instead of chasing down the 9,000 debtors in the debt package as a normal collection agency would, Oliver decided to stage the largest one-time giveaway in television history and work with the nonprofit RIP Medical Debt to forgive the $15 million with no consequences for the debtors.

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helloquirks

Okay but now I know what I want to do of I get rich?

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beabaseball

You dont have to be rich to do a bit of this actually

RIP Medical Debt is a charity (and therefore takes donations). They buy the rights to medical debt and then forgive them. So far they’ve forgiven over 1B in medical debt.

So a little ray of hope for someone out there today.

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shayvaalski

Donating $10 buys $1,000 of medical debt. This is real, it works, and we’ve done it ourselves. You can too.

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1eos
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bakwaaas

You gotta understand that some people never really grow. They never learn their lesson. They never recognise their mistakes, they never acknowledge their faults, they never admit they were in the wrong. You will never receive an apology from them, and you will never see their behaviour change.

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lilybee

if you’re in the notes saying “this is wrong and cruel because everyone is capable of growth” you’re not understanding the post.

yes, everyone is CAPABLE of growth and change. everyone has the RIGHT to growth and change. but no, not everyone will CHOOSE growth and change. some people are not interested in and cannot be made interested in self-improvement or self-reflection. some people will go their entire lives refusing to admit they might be wrong or examine their own behaviors. some people will never, ever accept responsibility for the effects they have on people and the world around them. humans are varied; some are just always gonna be like this.

it is VITAL to understand this if you’re the kind of person who tends to pour energy into helping others, especially if there are already people knowingly hurting you who consistently show absolutely no interest in changing that behavior. you can’t forcibly make them want to change who they are. you aren’t going to find a way to convince them to suddenly care that their behavior is hurting someone.

the motivation to change and grow comes from within. others may inspire us, but WE have to decide we want to be better and work towards that. until they decide that for themselves, nobody else can do it for them. and they might never. people are mortal. we are a finite series of choices. it is entirely possible to make mostly selfish ones.

everyone CAN grow, but not everyone will. not everyone wants to, and nobody can force the desire to grow as a person on someone else.

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