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- livilla

@writingmonet / writingmonet.tumblr.com

writer and daydreamer, especially for Domino Squad & TBB (SW) ao3 account: @WritingMonet second account of https://www.tumblr.com/blog/misssylvertongue
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Not A Liability

This is such a strong scene in The Clone Wars.

Many disabled people fear to be a liability for the people around them and some of them start to overcompensate to prove to themselves and others that this is not the case. This is especially true for those who acquired their disability like Echo and have to learn to live with the new situation.

I love that Star Wars gave them representation with someone as strong as Echo ♥️

“Eh, excuse me, Generals.“

Rex isn’t happy about Echo crashing the briefing, look at his face and body language (dropping his shoulders, shrugging slightly to apologize to General Skywalker when he leaves to approach Echo). He knows / thinks that Echo needs more healing, physically and emotionally, but Echo has different plans.

Notice how Echo doesn’t look at Rex and tries to march past him - he knows exactly that his Captain doesn’t approve. But Rex doesn’t let him get away with it. Echo‘s eyes widen in a short moment of surprise when Rex physically stops him but then he looks down, disappointed, afraid that his chance to prove himself is taken away from him. Finally he looks Rex in the eyes. Notice how his eyes move first before he tilts his head back up which gives him a rather submissive and pleading look before he finally decides to face his Captain and stand up for himself.

“Echo, I‘m sorry, but I just don’t think you’re ready for battle yet.“

“I am not a liability, Rex. I‘m the best chance we have to take back Anaxes.“

Look at Echo‘s face when Rex tells him he’s not ready yet 💔. Look at his disappointment when he breaks eye contact for a fraction of a second before he looks back into Rex‘s eyes and tells him that he’s not a liability.

A liability… Who put that in his head? Maybe it was himself. Maybe when Echo says out loud that he is not a liability he does it to hear his own words and to stop feeling this way. 💔 As a clone his worth was always strongly defined by his physical strength. The other aspect of his performance was his tactical and strategic knowledge. Now he has physically changed and his tactical and strategic knowledge is of no use anymore since the enemy had access to his brain. He needs to redefine his worth. And he wants to start now.

Rex probably knows that Echo is also running away from the images in his head that keep on popping up in the loneliness and boredom of his bed in the medbay and while it would technically be better for Echo to take his time and process everything, trauma therapy isn’t a luxury you can afford when you’re at war. And Rex also knows that he’s biased, worried for his brother whom he just got back. Rex‘s eyes show us that there are a lot of things going on in his head until he finally decides to look over to the Generals who have less personal involvement.

When Master Windu finally approves, Rex should let go of Echo, but something’s stopping him. It’s hard for him to let go of his friend and it takes Echo to firmly look into his eyes and ask “May I?“ for Rex to finally let him pass.

Echo immediately uses his scomp arm to show the Generals and Rex his plan. And while I think it was appropriate in that very scene to show that Echo doesn’t mind using his new body, I am also glad that they didn’t overstress the whole scomp thing in The Bad Batch and didn’t fall for the supercrip trope.

Still the scomp arm remained as a constant reminder of Echo‘s disability, one of the few examples in Star Wars where they resisted temptation to sugarcoat a limb difference with a prosthesis that makes him look “normal“.

Kudos to the top tier animation in this key scene in Echo‘s life and the representation they gave to people who have to find their place after a life changing injury.

Star Wars isn’t always perfect but sometimes it is.

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eobe

This is GOLD☝️

How is it possible that I missed this!? 😱

I didn‘t notice all of the details in that scene – another proof how much it depends on our own trained or not trained focus and aware or unaware filters!

I'd like to share my own experience and thoughts additionally, because I feel this so much ❤️‍🩹

I will alway remember when the doc told me, that my disorder is comparable to someone who was born with only one arm, trying to do the actions of people with two arms because no one around notices. It's most of the time exhausting beyond borders and some actions are simply not possible. And no one understands why, because there‘s nothing visible.

I broke hearing my life in this dryly and clinical explained nutshell and I don't break that easy.

Genuinely considering to be a liability and feeling like one is pure poison. That is something I've been used to since I can remember. And I also sadly had to learn long ago that I either don't have much time if I want to keep up pace or get descried and then have to deal with pity behavior, that fuels the feeling of being a liability.

The natural and very human reaction to meeting people without disorders – especially if you're a child – is trying to keep up and hiding the disease. This behavior is not healthy, but a reflex that often becomes more complex and precise, even if the energy amount to keep it undetected is dreadful. You can control it better the more you train. And get used to. A mask.

So when I heard this sentence I froze, nodded, collected the required information, got myself a coffee later and broke then in the middle of Regensburg main station. People tried to help and there was the pity. They were really kind but how to help if there is nothing to help?

I cried and then there was the anger, the frustration and after some processing I roasted this toxic feeling of being a liability to ashes, because

It's. Not. True.

To heal this wound it may be urgent to get the chance to prove yourself even if that lucky having some voices shouting instantly "You don't have to prove anything!" – what is actually the aimed mindset.

But the healing way may require those kinds of actions, to regain (or even gain for the first time) the feeling of being... whole.

Like Echo becoming the hero of Anaxes, doing actions no one can.

To eventually recognize that you've always been whole.

Thank you for showing this @isthereanechoinhere96 😘

And sorry for bad English, I hope I got my message pleasant to read, reach out if you need clearing ☺️

Thank you for sharing this personal part of your story with us ♥️ It’s great to see how much comfort and representation we can all find when we take a closer look at the show.

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writingmonet

LOVE THIS! @isthereanechoinhere96 the best thing I've yet read of my day, thank you :)

@the-bi-space-ace thought you want to read it

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November Prompts 🍂

Word prompts to use for doodling or writing

  1. crisp air
  2. memories
  3. tea time
  4. rainy
  5. carriage ride
  6. star gazing
  7. mysterious
  8. early sunsets
  9. historic
  10. cozy
  11. shooting stars
  12. gloomy
  13. cuddling
  14. scarecrow
  15. gratefulness
  16. stellar constellation
  17. blanket
  18. rainboots
  19. hugs
  20. mist
  21. fireplace
  22. steaming mugs
  23. wind
  24. puddles
  25. moonlight
  26. Thanksgiving
  27. grey sky
  28. smoke
  29. apple cider
  30. lanterns
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Everything I've Wanted

my little Halloween story @the-bi-space-ace, @saturn-sends-hugs, @spicy-tomato-sauce. This does tend to happen when you watch The Truman Show and Wandavision in a row.

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

The sun is brighter than usual through the curtains when Echo opens his eyes. The hour is well advanced in the morning. He rolled his eyes, feeling an arm over his waist. 

His twin, Fives, is still heavily asleep, snoring as usual. And he dared to say he never snorted. 

Echo wakes him with a grateful pillow on the head, making his twin hide even further in the bed.

“No, I’m not getting up…”

“As if you could skip breakfast. A shame, truly. I was planning to make pancakes. Well, I guess it will be only me.”

The one-eye of Fives on him makes him laugh, the other hidden by the pillows. His twin still complains at the idea but does get up, following Echo in the kitchen. 

“I was planning on going swimming today,” Echo declares as he starts to pull the ingredients on the table. “Wanna come?”

“You bet I do. And this is almost Halloween. Watching a movie and giving treats to the kids is plenty enough?”

His twin nods. “Make the caff,” he asks at Fives. His twin executes himself while Echo is focused on the eggs then pulling the utensils. Behind him Fives is putting the table and the orange juice.

“Fives,” Echo hiss suddenly, a sudden sharp pain stopping him from all the preparations he was doing.

His twin runs at his side, helping him to sit, slowly and gently. “It will pass,” Echo assures his best friend.

“I know. But I still worry. What would I do if I didn’t worry about you?”

“You’ll be bothered,” Echo teases, between two deep breaths, hand squirming Fives’ one, his anchor. “You would make the house explode.”

“Never with you around.”

He snorts, feeling a head against his temple and silence for short minutes before he shakes his head, signalling to Fives that he feels better. He gives him a suspicious look, dropping it though.

“Echo. Thank you. For being my brother.”

He rolls his eyes, knowing perfectly that Fices is intentionally annoying him, “Yeah, yeah. Come on, di’kut I am hungry.”

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

The young man, sometimes, imagines things - he’s convinced of that. Sometimes there’s a name on his tongue that he can’t recall but means much for him. 

“We should invite, you know…you know,” Echo tried to say, snapping his fingers together. “Our brothers. The pair, always together like us.”

Fives sent him a sceptical look. Right, Echo will need more details. 

“One of them is…a, a doctor or something like that. Come on, Fives, he’s terrifying!”

“Like you?”

He shakes his head, while Fives smiles all the same, looking at him with the same deepness, rarely blinking, finishing to put the table. “Come on, help me. I’m doing everything here.”

“For once,” Echo retorts, getting up and enjoying every moment of this peaceful life. He has the feeling that once it seemed out of reach, for reasons he doesn’t recall anymore. Yet, it’s happening now. Sometimes, when he’s alone, he thinks that there are still things missing (blond hair, a sweet giggle, goggles, someone's sneaky voice, an impressive giant and the comforting sight of a tattoo) but that’s because he feels lonely or is bored. He always was the most inventive of the two of them, he knows. No wonder he imagines all those feelings - he’s practically convinced that his memory is never too good to forget a giant tattoo on someone.

“Bon appétit.”

And then, as always, the name comes back on his mind when the person appears in front of him. Echo feels stupid to have bothered Fives for trying to find names he always knew.

“Jesse!”

His brother grinned like a madman as always, and pulled him in a hug, entering the house, Kix behind him, hugging Echo as well. 

“It’s been far too long,” Jesse exclaims. How long? Funnily enough, Echo has no idea. Months or years? Perhaps simply weeks? Jesse and Fives do have the same flair for being too overdramatic di’kuts. Kix rolls his eyes while Fives enters the house at a good time, face illuminated when he sees them all in the main room. They trade stories and anecdotes about how life goes peacefully when they’re travelling (how could Echo even forget that those two are already moving from place to place?). 

“Glad you have stopped by,” he says

“Oh, you know. It’s hard not to ob-come…when we're expected.” 

“No idea of what you’re saying,” Echo shrugs with a smirk.

 Jesse looks at him blankly for seconds, who appears longer to Echo, his brother’s eyes on him without blinking. He searches in his brother’s face for anything wrong. 

Then, abruptly, Jesse explodes laughing.

 Always the trickster, Echo recalls. 

Yet as he laughs, he wonders how he had once forgotten Jesse’s smile: frank and nice to hear, the comforting laugh found again, almost reassuring him that nothing has changed. 

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

Echo’s mornings are rather quiet and often the same. Part of his daily routine is leaving the house for a fresh walk, his twin with or without him, considering how Fives sometimes disappears for hours and passes in front of his neighbourhood.

“Hi, Echo!”

He turns and waves at Reel, the kind Twi’lek, as he walks back home. He needs fresh orange juice now.

“Hi, Echo!”

He turns, frowning. He must have seen him waving. “Hello there,” he salutes. The words are vaguely familiar to him.

Two steps done toward the house and:

“Hi, Echo!”

This time he’s sceptical and stops for a few seconds as Reel returns to his duties, completely forgetting him. Uh, he thinks before walking again toward their apartment, at him and his twin. Weird.

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

The house has the sound of meat and tomatoes cooking, the cinnamon rolls put aside, and inflating before being put in the oven to be cooked. Echo’s alone at home, enjoying cooking as he always does, Fives being elsewhere visiting the neighbourhood. At this point, he has read almost every book in the house. 

He watch the hour and realises it’s time for him to put the cinnamon rolls in the oven, after checking they’re big enough. By the time he has opened the furnace to put the cakes in, a quick face, similar to his with tattoos on his cheeks is watching him blankly, eyes devoid of any life and burned like meat. 

“Osik!” Echo scream, the plate of rolls escaping his hands, a sudden pain in his back. He looks again and all he sees is the usual piece, no burned face staring at him.

“Echo?” 

The door closes, as Fives appears, face surprised, all stiffened. “Echo, what happens, are you alright?”

“No! The cinnamon!” He whims, blinking several times in a row to force the image out of his mind. Fives seems relieved that it’s nothing else, his arms relaxing immediately. When Echo tries to help him get the rolls, he cannot restrain the hiss of pain, jerking in reflex. “My back…” he says to his twin. 

“Alright, let’s get you seated, alright?”

Echo shakes his head, trying to understand when he could have injured his back so badly. A tensed muscle perhaps? 

“Echo?”

“Hum?”

“You should sleep. I’ll take care of the rolls,” Fives smiles, helping him to stand and then sitting on his bed. 

“Don’t overcook them,” he mumbles. “Don’t put the house on fire either.”

Fives’ little mocking laugh is enough to lull him into sleep.

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

The door closed and Echo angrily turned at his twin, crossing his arms. “What the fuck is going on around here?”

“What do you mean?”

The angry twin gives him a “are-you-serious” face, his hands raised in the air. “Don’t. Fives, tell me. What have you done? What the fuck is happening? Why do the neighbourhoods are acting weirder and weirder? Something’s wrong here!”

All that his best friend does is give him a confused, puzzled look. “Echo…I…”

“Don’t lie to me. You’re about to lie to me, I can fucking smell it.”

Fives shakes his dead, slowly, a small frown on the tired lines of his face. Echo wasn’t sure how, in the blink of an eye, Fives seemed exhausted. He walks slowly toward Echo, heading his hands toward his twin ones, silently asking if he can take them. He nods.

“Fives, what’s happening? I mean, fuck. I’ve got better memory than most of the people I know but I can’t fucking recalls anything. I couldn’t recall our own brothers' names until they appeared right in front of us the last time. I keep thinking about stuff that never happened. Everything’s weird here. It doesn’t feel real…you know? The way everyone speaks to me either. And fuck Fives, why don’t we have medications? For my pains? Why is there I’ve felt so much pain but there’s nothing on my body to explain it?”

“Fives, am I, am I going mad?” Echo croaks, panicking at this idea. 

“No!” His twin violently protests, his forehead against his, hands cupping his cheeks. “You are my twin, Eyayah. Isn’t that enough for you? To have this life here, with me, like we always wanted?”

Echo breaks free of the comforting hug, shaking. “That’s the thing, Fives!” He rumbles, an invisible pain in his back again. “I don’t remember anything and I w-fuck!” Echo hiss, the pain jerking him, forcing him to use the wall as a support.

“Echo!”

He stops him from coming closer by extending his hand, trying to breathe in and out, forcing himself to stand to confront his twin’s panicking face. “I want to remember Fives, what’s happening. Where are we?”

The door closed and Echo angrily turned at his twin, crossing his arms. “What the fuck is going on around here?”

Fives chuckles. “You know, I think we’ve landed in the weirder area possible of Naboo,” he says. “They almost make us look weird, right?”

Echo silently agrees, glad to know that his twin is always on the same page as him. 

“I think we should go eat then sleep. I can see how tense you are, little brother. And, by tomorrow, everything will be better, I’m sure of it.”

“A good night won’t fix my disappointed memory,” he growls.

“I bet it will. Also, we need medications, from Kix preferably. Don’t give me that look Eyayah, you can’t stay in pain all the time and I’m no blind man.”

His twin rolls his eyes, and Fives pulls him in a hug. It’s the safest place to be for Echo, whatever his mood is. “I’ll make dinner,” Fives decides. 

“You’re weird too. Do you have something to apologise for? Or is it again one of your intrigues against me?” Echo asks 

“No intrigues. Just glad you’re still with me until the end of the road.”

Fives elbow him teasingly, signing him to put the table on while he starts to cook.

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

“Really?”

Fives appear, hands on the dual blasters, dressed up like an ARC when he goes out of the vision. “You really think that your ridiculous attempts will succeed, Rex? Here’s my advice to improve: stop it.”

The man he once followed ‘til the end of the world stands in front of him, clearly surprised by his arrival, signing half of the 501st to stand down, his familiar Jaig eyes nowhere to judge him with the coldness of a soldier.

“You can’t keep doing that, Fives!” He screams to cover the worldly distance between Fives and him, who has stopped cautiously far enough to see the first fool to go physical against him.

“I don’t think you heard me, Rex. Stay out of our lives. I’m not the one who destroys everything it touches. At least, here, everyone’s safe.”

“Listen to what you're saying, Fives! All of this is fake. Your life is fake. The people there are just illusions, puppets under your commands when you don’t outright take them as hostages. It rings a bell, doesn’t it? You stole Echo. You stole him as simple as that. I know you’ve suffered-”

The eyes of the ARC have changed from brown to red for a single, ephemeral moment, at the evocation of a monster. The reason why Fives has lost practically anything he ever had in his life. 

“Don’t you dare compare me to this monster. At least here, I can protect my brother, something you have repeatedly failed to do for years. We have all we ever wanted. You aren’t taking that. Again.”

“You can’t recreate every brother Echo will remember sooner than later,” the Captain tries to argue. For all answers, Fives put in his smug face, one that Rex used to find annoying, hands on his dual blasters but relaxed otherwise. He doesn’t plan to shoot but he will, if forced to. 

“All this time I have been incredibly patient with you on Echo's name, for the fond memories he had for you. But you are making it incredibly difficult to go on like that. So, this is my last warning. Stay out of our lives, Rex.”

“Fives! Fives!”

He’s about to go in again when he hears a blaster fire before he feels his skin burn, a side of his right arm touched. Rex looks as shocked as he is to the shot, turning toward the clone responsible for it.

“Bad move, Rex…” Fives chuckles as he touches the frontiers of his world. Take them too. 

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

It’s past the hour to sleep when Fives goes home, walking immediately to the bathroom, unafraid to wake Echo with the number of sleep pills he has given him, not by choice. That’s not that he wanted to do it, never. But he needed his twin deep asleep for tonight as Fives got rid of his gear, hiding it along with Echo’s. He takes a shower, to get rid of the blood from his face and hands, and pulls bacta over minor injuries, nothing that the ever-observant Echo should notice. He remains alone in the bathroom, looking at the mirror and his distorted face. Did he ever have this look? He awaits until bacta as an act and the wounds have all but gone away, leaving only after he assures himself there are no traces of blood (or smell of it) in the home. 

He planned to sleep in his own room when he heard Echo shaking breaths, and whimpers coming out of his throat. He turns to see his twin, closing his eyes at the view of what the Techno Union did to him.

“Oh my god!” He screams, turning away in the blink of an eye, forcing himself to breathe slowly. Focus. It’s Echo all the same again, with a healthy appearance by the time he turns again, his twin still fighting battles in his dreams - ones that Fives wished he could have helped with. He doesn't hesitate, taking the hand of the only person in the world he cares about, lying behind him on the bed.

“Rex,” Echo let out. “Rex, no,”

“It’s alright, Eyayah,” Fives reassures, whispering in his twin’s ear, feeling the cold hands of his vod’ika. “Nothing will happen. You're home. I’m here.”

And he’ll make sure that Echo will never be out of his sight for too long. 

He kisses Echo’s temple and rubs his hand, rearranging his curls. He notices a bit of blood near his thumbnail that he scratches until it has gone away, a ghost of it, still making sure to help his twin get out of his nightmares. 

“Fives…” Echo muffles, turning to hide in the crook of his neck. “Rex, whe’r…Rex?”

“Sleep, vod’ika,” he hushes him. “I’m right here, alright?”

“Rex-”

“There’s no one with that name here,” he adds. “Go to sleep, Eyayah. I’m here. Everything's fine.”

His twin is already back to sleep, silent this time. Fives curses everything who has pushed his twin to nightmares, taking him away from home, from him. He closes his eyes and goes to sleep too, dreaming of nothing, appeased only by the breathing of his twin by his side. 

That’s all he ever wanted. 

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Cupcakes, Fairy Lights and One Undead Army

It's Halloween for the Bad Batch

A fluffy Modern AU

Halloween fic is finally here! Pat on the back to me for not making this super depressing

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writingmonet

such a cute, fluffy story! I loved it :)

One of the batches always stays with Echo so he isn't alone, the cupcakes, Hunter make-up must be pretty terrible though if he really passes his hand on his face every time Crosshairs annoys him xD the call with Fives reminds me so much of the calls we all make with people we can't be near even if we wanted it.

happy halloween to everyone :)

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renton6echo

Echo-vember

I've been feeling down lately, and one thing that can help me get out of my funk is reading fanfic centered on my favorite ARC Trooper Echo.

There are some real gems in the Echo-centric Ao3 tag. I want to pay it forward and try (the keyword is try) to commit to writing Echo-centered one-shots each week for November. I dub it "Echo-vember"

If anyone would like to join me in my endeavor, I'm happy to chat and exchange ideas. I have one drafted work that I need to dust off and edit, but I'm open to more brainstorming.

👀👀👀 I love this!

I will do anything to put more Echo-centered fics into the world 🩶

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writingmonet

Hey, can I help too? 🥺🥺🥺

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I’ve Got You

Summary: in the safe room after half of their team was infected with a deadly drug Echo holds Rex through his final moments

This! I had something written with this exact same premise but then I remembered that I had the perfect opportunity for a dark AU of the Calling Me Home series. This is set in Chapter 11 of Keep These Shadows Out where instead of The 212th arriving in time and saving everyone Rex, unfortunately, doesn't make it.

Warnings: whump, Major Character Death, blood

Tagging people I think might want to read this one: @saturn-sends-hugs @phantom-of-the-501st @happybean17 @writingmonet

I apologize in advance for the tears :'(

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writingmonet

EXCUSE ME??? This is beautiful and horrible.

One hour is A LOT when someone's down.

Echo losing Rex after Fives is the worst-case scenario EVER. It's who Rex insisted on going to save Echo from the Techno Union. Cody didn't, and no one else did since Rex is the closest brother Echo has left.

This is beautiful, I knew I would tear up but yeah...I'm going to make you pay my therapy bill at this speed. And I'll still have to read the chapter 18...oh man.

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