i have no title and i must post

Am I crazy or are these search recommendations the lyrics to a new wave song from the 80s?

You guys see it, right?

Game show idea:

Millenials are tasked with creating a 7-second video in the spirit of Vine. HOWEVER, if they copy an already existing Vine, they will be shot into the Sun (not the one in the sky, but the newspaper in the UK).

Contestants will be judged mostly on vibes, but also on presentation.

The prize is two hours in a VR-headset with a game that simulates financial stability in a just world, and enough mushrooms to make them believe it.

saving posts to drafts is one of the best features of this site, because you can write out an absolutely trash shitpost, see that it is trash and shit and a post, save it to your drafts, and later on when your standards have lowered enough you can come back and be like "your time has come"

you know how if there's like an aging boxer, there's still that sense that they're dangerous - sure, life left them behind, but the echoes of past glory are still there, plain to see?

yeah, that's the sense I get from old stuffed toys. "yeah, kiddo. i used ta be a cutie." we see you. if push came to shove, you could still put on the dukes. but no, Stuffykins! if you get hugged again, all your stuffing might come out! "i gotta go out the way i go out. it ain't about how hard ya hug, it's about how hard you can get hugged."

In times of relaxation, this species of great ape likes to sit outside their dwelling and listen to the tiny dinosaurs shout "FUCK ME! I'M HERE! THIS IS MY TERRITORY! FUCK ME!" over and over. They find the tiny dinosaurs' vocalizations calming. The reason for this is unknown.

Don't say "life is too short" before making a decision

Say "life is too long and the consequences of this colossal fuck-up I'm about to commit will distract me from the tedium"

Headcanon: When he hits his teenage years, Aang starts fucking with his friends by making up all sorts of wild stuff that totally happened 100 years ago. Toph always says "he's not lying", but at this point the Gaang knows that The Gremlin Supports Lying For Fun, so Aang always suggests going to Bumi to confirm whatever bullshit he's spewing this time. And he always does.

The Gaang figures that Aang must be somehow coordinating this with Bumi, because no matter how absurd the lie is, Bumi is always 100% on board and can elaborate on it seamlessly. They keep trying to find out how Aang and Bumi are coordinating the lies, going so far as to intercept Aang's letters to Bumi to check for secret codes, but they can never find anything.

And the truth is that they're not coordinating. Bumi just rolls with whatever Aang comes up with because it's hilarious and Aang is his buddy.

It'd be a real swell vacation if I could just be a housecat for a month. Sleep most of the time, be able to jump like eight times my height, get cuddles if I want them, bite people if I don't (and they wouldn't think less of me for it), lick my own butthole, play with yarn, headbutt people when I like them, be very soft...

If they ever come up with the technology, I'm down.

For the first time in my life I have interacted in depth with the Fabric People.

And I now know why the largest tapestries were made for kings. Not because they were expensive, no. Because only kings had militaries of a sufficient size to keep the weavers contained.

My one real skill is coming across an event from like, 6 months ago, and immediately thinking of an absolutely A+ banger of a joke that would have been really funny if I had made it back then when the event was relevant but would just be confusing and unfunny now.

I have this listed on my resume and am proud to say that I am still unemployed.

i have now experienced adulthood

well, not the "own the place where you live" part

or the "advance in your chosen career" part

or the "raise a family and take part in your community" part

or the "financial security" part

or the "discover your passions and become grounded in yourself" part

but i am ready for death, so. that counts.

Meet me in the middle, says the unjust man.

You take a step forward, and he takes a step back.

Meet me in the middle, says the unjust man.

You take a few running steps and punch the unjust man in the nose.

Dake me do dhe hosbidal, says the unjust man.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU GET WHEN A CARTOON TIGER FALLS OFF A CLIFF?

THE AIEEE OF THE TIGER