we see a lot of cutting initials or branding symbols into whumpee's chest, stomach, or back and it's great. but how do we feel about the inner thigh

Whumpee writes a stand-up comedy routine about their experience which is so truly horrifying that the only person they can perform it for is their former fellow captive-- who ends up laughing so hard they can't breathe.

"Shock collar? I barely know 'er!"

Whumpee who is recovering after the whumpTM, but it's not going great. They're so frustrated with themselves, with their caretakers, just with everything. Everyone is so soft and understanding and it bothers them and they want to scream, but they know they should be grateful.

Until Caretaker comes along. Caretaker isn't 'nice' like the others, they don't take bullshit. They're good for Whumpee, but they don't baby them. They treat them like an adult with anatomy, and it's so refreshing for Whumpee.

"You want to stay up, fine. But you will tell me when you can't anymore, because if I have to drag you off the floor we're both in trouble. Understand?"

"Stop whining. What do you need?" (And then they get or do whatever it is without issues or judgement.)

"Want to tell me why you're doing worse today?" -- "No..." -- "Okay."

"Where does it hurt?" -- "It doesn-" -- "Don't give me that, I can see it hurts. Now tell me where."

Caretaker trusts Whumpee to know what they need, and lets them know again and again they won't take this nonsense of hiding their pain. They're practical, and kind, and Whumpee needed that.

Heads up, new whumpee with big brown puppy eyes unlocked 🥺

How I go to bed when I've got new whumpees to put through all the same old whump daydreams I've been carefully curating for years

Sickfic + kidnapping whump

feel free to add on!

Hmm yeah the 'didn't realize they were injured trope' but getting in a little fight and not realizing the punch you felt was actually a knife until the guys are down and you're stumbling away and suddenly everything hurts now that the adrenaline is gone-

woah this character is so cool i wish they were covered in blood their whole body trembling with a look of absolute horror on their face as theyre struggling to breathe in panic

Washing wounds hurts. Washing scrapes and scratches hurts. Rubbing over torn apart skin with a soapy sponge hurts. Cleaning out a pus-oozing infection hurts. A cold shower while having muscle cramps hurts. It all burns and throbs, pain radiating from each and every little opening. Open blisters on the feet light on fire as soapy water runs down off the legs—this almost impossible to stand comfortably and getting in or out of the tub creates a fall risk.

Burns sting like a nest of bees as water pummels the withering flesh. Injuries on the fingers make it hard to thoroughly wash the hair, even as blood, skin, and debris crumble away under the water. Turning your head just the wrong way can get water in your ears or nose or can encourage shampoo to run into the eyes. Plucking shirt fibers from sores with tweezers is a tedious and agitating exercise.

Perhaps even the unraveling towel catches on a loose stitch or staple. Perhaps Whumpee can't recognize themselves the first time they see their reflection in the mirror. Perhaps all Whumpee feels is the aftermath of all they've endured. Perhaps Whumpee has to do it all by themselves, including redressing their wounds.

Bathe your Whumpees, lovelies ✨

vehicles and violence: cars

cw: mentions of kidnapping, restraints, drugging

I’m not usually one for conditioned whumpees, and especially not for recovery, but I think I would really enjoy those types of scenes more if the trauma responses were allowed to be more nuanced and complex.

This isn’t a criticism of anyone specific, it’s just something I think I lack in the community, and I don’t think I’m the one to write it either, but I think that what puts me off is that I know what it’s like to be triggered by something, and it’s such a complicated and not always conscious process.

Like yes they might feel that someone they’re with is angry or upset with them and suddenly try to do anything they can to please them, but that might come with a wave of shame and self loathing once they’ve realised that nothing was wrong and they’ve just embarrassed themselves in front of someone close to them.

Or maybe they’re scared of that part of themself, and they’re so scared that other people will see it or hurt them again that they push them away, maybe they test their boundaries, maybe they hurt the people they love instead because they want to see what happens when they finally do get angry.

Maybe they hate that part of them that makes them become someone else, that makes them get lost in their mind. Maybe they resent how it makes relationships hard, how they try to move on but some small thing ignites a carefully buried spark of fear and the whole thing starts again.

I also wish there wasn’t so much of a power dynamic of whumpee and caretaker, where the whumpee is someone who is mentally ill and traumatised and not expected to ever be independent or live alone. No, I want them to have friends and partners and lovers, and struggle and find joy in equal measure, on their own terms.

There’s absolutely people writing this sort of content, and there are things I will read because I think they capture that complexity, and of course these are my personal feelings but I do urge people to think about this when they write, if they want to.

most writing of conditioning bugs me because it tends to be whumpees desperately trying to please whumper because they really do LOVE them now and loathe themselves,

not because they know they're supposed to and this is the safest thing. Like I prefer some more realism. Where the narrative at least shows it isn't love, it's self deceit out of self defense. Whether the whumpee realizes it at first or not- and they will nearly always eventually have their taught ideas break down in the face of the evidence of reality. It might take years.

I know some say Whump doesn't need to be realistic! And mostly no it doesn't. but if you're going to write about things real people have gone through, that shape them for life, and need a lot of therapy to work through, I feel it's respectful to at least know a little about it.

CW ahead for survivors of ABA or Conversion Therapy- Maybe don't read. Yes that is Conditioning and I'm about to get close to describing it.

I very much agree with what @redwingedwhump said!!!

So. Background. My knowledge of conditioning comes animal cognition (just finished a masters in animal behaviour!) (activate science mode!!!). But basically:

Conditioning is associating something else (food) with stimuli (a bell) with some kind of behavior (drool) in its most basic form. But it can, and does get more complicated than Pavlov.

So for example: (Abuse cw)

It's possible to associate the raising of a hand. With a slap. And that provokes a flinch.

Usually conditioning itself can become almost involuntary. (Not always but often). For example that flinch or the drool from before.

There are other examples of like: (sex cw)

Orgasms being learnt to be associated with certain smells and so that smell along becoming able to one it's own, turn someone on.

..

Anyway!!! The point I'm trying to make is, if you wanna add some realism to conditioning:

Add that conditioning can become a reflex.

Add that the behavioural response of the whumpee isn't under their conscious control or them having to think consciously to avoid those reflexes.

And then it means that recovery is just that more slow and means they have to work at deconditioning themselves slowly. They have to unpick what is their normal response and what is their body freaking out.

It also means that a whumpee's internal and external dialogue may not match what their Body forces them to do.

Their conditioned response to a situation would override their actual desired response.

Which I personally think is more interesting.

The fear of your body not cooperating is interesting.

I hope that helps! And yay! Look at me using my masters!!!

I do feel like although there are situations where people can learn to associate say a raised voice with danger or a belt or a raised hand with impending pain and punishment, the way that people’s trauma responses and triggers form can be more complicated. Their captor wouldn’t be able to accurately predict what aspect of the situation their brain might latch onto and then have locked as a trigger.

But I also really like what you said about it being involuntary, because I think it’s really interesting when it is an unconscious response, so their body is panicking but mentally they know they’re safe. And there’s this disconnect and that can be so frustrating because they know that things are okay but some part of their mind won’t let them relax.

One thing (of many) about the way most conditioning whump is written that bugs me is that the premise is "they are a sobbing stuttering mess because the whumper hit them a lot and now they think everyone will" as if they were taught this crying etc behavior by the whumper. In the first place, my brothers and sisters in pain, please think about how a whumper is going to react to that kind of display. Because I have a lot of whumpers with a lot of different motives and methods and I can't think of a single one who would put up with that from a whumpee. In the second place, speaking from experience, conditioning doesn't rob you of your ability to distinguish between whumpers (abusers) and friends. You know your friends are not your whumper (abuser).

You don't kick into that level of distress because you're used to getting hurt and expect everyone to hurt you. You kick into that level of distress because you're used to one person who had you in isolation hurting you, and now that you know you're with friends, you don't know WHAT to expect. They are probably not going to behave like a whumper, but how much is that accustomed (NOT universally expected) hurt actually going to be mitigated? You don't know. Do your friends have their own unspoken "rules" you'll have to learn like you had to learn your whumper (abuser)'s unspoken "rules"? You don't know! They’re unspoken! So you're panicking, and most whumpers (abusers) do not in fact tolerate panic or tears, and now that it's happening it creates a spiral.

But at that point you're not afraid of getting hurt for whatever you started panicking about. You're afraid of getting hurt--or worse, left--because you know from experience that panic and tears are not tolerated. You have been told a million times that panic and tears will never be tolerated by anyone ever, not just the whumper (abuser). You're not sure about whatever set this off, but you are 100% sure about THAT.

Also, echoing the flat caretaker who is always patient and cuddly as a pet peeve. If you have ever been in a cptsd panic spiral, you know that people for the most part are not always patient or cuddly. They snap at you when you can't break out of an apology loop, or ask for the 20th time if they're absolutely positively sure they're not mad. Almost nobody will hold your hand 100% of the time. The people that do tend to be former whumpees (victims) themselves. Because those are the only people who really understand why your freakouts are happening.