none of what you said is canon, per all three aftermath books, bloodline, and all of the tfa tie-in material that mentions anyone in the organa-solo family. and also tfa itself.
Han lived with Leia and Ben except for BRIEF PERIODS when he would go host a charity ship race, sometimes taking Ben with him. he was not a smuggler or gambler during Ben’s childhood and returned to that life only after Kylo Ren ~became~, causing Han and Leia to become estranged. canon. per bloodline.
Leia was not a negligent mother; she took baby Ben with her everywhere and SHE IS FORCE SENSITIVE HERSELF, so when she sent Ben to Luke it was because he’d already hurt someone by accident (per ppppablo? iirc? at any rate –) Luke is??? Ben’s uncle??? they’d known each other Ben’s whole life??? it’s not like she shipped him off to Siberia with strangers?? she was literally doing what was best for for the child she ADORED AND KEPT UP CONSTANT CONTACT WITH – CANONICALLY – until BEN cut off that contact… as a 23-y/o adult man. canon, per bloodline and to a lesser extent empire’s end.
also canon things: Ben was capable of normal and happy childhood socialization! he had friends! he grew up on a safe planet that was not a war zone and he was in no physical danger there! he was literally doted on and spoiled by lando, chewie, and Luke! Kylo Ren chose to become a warlord all by himself as an adult man! he chose to murder Luke’s students! he chose to spit in the face of bail organa’s legacy even though bail was the man he grew up knowing to be his grandfather! he is an adult making those choices as an adult, not a poor lamb-child!
i know it’s cool and edgy to act like his behavior can be justified by pretending like the OT trio is The Actual Evil, but that’s literally canonically not the case. blaming a grown ass man’s crimes on his mother is bullshit
