Oh wow. Thanks for letting me in on what you know here.

Oh FUCK I forgot to mention I lived. Thanks! Glad to be here. My mod is also still alive.

For the past few years, I have not been able to physically use computers, so I have not been able to do any liveblogs for a very long time. But that whole deal seems to have improved, and might be slightly less of an issue these days. And by these days I mean literally the past few weeks. That is about all I can say to that extent. It may change at any time.

In some very specific ways, I stayed safe in this pandemic thanks to Homestuck. I have received a lot, lot of help from people I met from liveblogging. Life saving help.

Later this year is the 10th anniversary of this blog. Everyone who followed me in the beginning is an adult now. I say this every time I come back around, but I will say it again anyway. My followers saved my life. Back then, and just recently too. I mean that literally. I took a risk that has kept me alive, and the only reason I gave it a chance in the first place was because of everyone’s support. I still remember that day. I remember so many hospital trips just thinking in my head about my followers, because it was so much fun to get to know new people. Specific ones. In general, too. To me, as a terrified teenager isolated from worsening chronic illness, you were most of what I had. And the most I ever had. Many of those people became my best friends. And even more of you, I have been lucky enough to meet. All across the United States.

So much has happened in the past 10 years. So, so much...you guys remember Dashcon? I mean, not to bring it up, but...you guys remember Dashcon? Wow. And that one time we lost post editing rights. And all those Newgrounds crashes. A lot has changed in the past 10 years. All of us have changed.

A lot of you are no longer on this website. And I know some of you have surely died. But there are people reading this, right now, you included, that are still here. From whenever you joined me. That is so amazing to me, almost all of you have been here for most of those 10 years. It has been a pleasure to grow up with you. I want to stay together for many years more.

Thinking back on just those 10 years, we have watched so many unpredictable things. Witnessed so many moments of hopelessness. We are still here. You are still here with me. This pandemic will end. Life is total bullshit, and nothing is certain. Nothing at all. I think that is something to take a lot of hope in. However bad things are, you do not know that they will stay that way or get worse. No matter how bad anything is. The memories we have shared give me so much hope for who is out there in the world.

There will be more than just than this pandemic. It is not impossible to be happy again. Many of you are now chronically ill after becoming infected. You might be afraid, sad, angry. These emotions are not the end. Most of my happiest memories happened, and nearly all of my best friends I have met after becoming sick. I have been sick for a very long time, and it will get worse. Even now, I am happy. I am so happy. I am so, so happy to have been able to meet all of you. I have had joy while in agony, I have learned how to live, and I can say for certain that it is possible to be happy while in pain. There is so much to enjoy out there in the world, and so many different ways to enjoy it.

Isolation can be overwhelming, crushing. I have been there. This pandemic itself can be overwhelming, for all of us. Right here with that too. There is joy on the other side of this worth looking forward to. The world is changing, but so are we. We can do this. Today you may be standing (or sitting) in a room by yourself. Tomorrow, who knows. Life is bullshit.

How exciting!