*youth pastor voice* "You know who else had 'mad drip'? The serpent that Skaði placed over Loki's head—"

Sometimes witchcraft is having elaborate rituals and dedicating entire hours to your dieties

And sometimes witchcraft is channeling a message from one of the old ones while chilling on a recliner in a charizard onsie

Sometimes heathenry is preparing a mixture of hand-ground herbs, pouring mead, reading runes, and reciting a ritual you wrote beforehand by the light of flickering flames.

Sometimes heathenry is offering a winning game of Sudoku to the All-father.

I love hearing the creative ways pagans and witchy folks intertwine their secular lives with their faith or spiritual practices. I find the act of dedicating something mundane--or inviting them to join an everyday activity--to be a very intimate way of connecting with the gods/ancestors/spirits x0x

For me, the best instance of wild worship I had was when I played Skyrim as an exact version of myself (only as a Dwemer/Dwarf), tamed a white unicorn, and it randomly generated a name for the unicorn which was "Loki". I sat at my computer with a flat stare for a moment in total silence, glanced up at the ceiling, and said, "Welp ya got me good on that one."

The solemn prayers and moments of worship are as valuable as the hilarious and unexpected ones.

You can sit there reading runes and communing directly in heart and soul with full intent, putting mind and body forth for the gods to know and see, or you could also just be at your PC during insomniac episodes and somehow wind up with the one and only unicorn ever that's suddenly named Loki.

When they say the gods work in mysterious ways, it's kinda our way of saying be ready. What for? Just. Be. Ready.

Well I think we all know which one I'm voting for, at least.

Vikings didn't have horns on their helmets but I bet if you showed them a single modern Viking depiction they'd all start doing it like gangsters imitating The Godfather

a beautiful man with long black hair dressed in all white sat next to me on the train back from denmark. i complimented his outfit, and he asked me where the train was going. after i told him, he then pointed at my shirt which says 'catastrophe' and said "oh i know a lot about those." and laughed uproariously.

and then he asked me "do you know about norse mythology?" and i said yes a bit because i read the edda a decade ago, and he said "i met fenrir in denmark" and i said that's probably not good if fenrir is walking around. and he said "oh don't worry about it, vithar will take care of it" and i replied oh but that's ragnarøk, that's still pretty bad for us mortals is it not? and he grinned at me like i said something incredibly funny. and then he ignored me for the rest of the train ride?

Rogue: "Aaaaand that's a 23 in investigation"

Sorcerer/warlock: "You rolled a 6!"

Rogue: "Yeah, this character is a little overpowered..."

correct tag by @we-are-ninja

(I mean Rogues are only overpowered in skills, meanwhile Barbarians wreck monsters and spellcasters wreck whole battlefields, IT'S FINE.)

"HOT VIKING GUYS ARE WAITING TO MEET CHASTE ENGLISH LADIES IN YOUR AREA"

Happy Lindisfarne y'all! 8-6-793

It's that time of year again, y'all!

I maxed out enchanting and smithing, then used elixirs, just to see what the fuck would happen.

I killed a revered dragon in 1 hit.

Y'all I've been having the time of my life playing Skyrim lately lol.

BTW this is my dude, Hagen.

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A DIME

THATS WHY I MAKE MEADE

OUTTA THE COMPANY SLIME

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A DIME

THATS WHY I STEAL HONEY

TWO ATTA TIME

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I MAKE A CENT

THATS WHY I TAKE HONEY PACKETS,

BOTTLE, AND FERMENT

BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR

I DONT MAKE JACK

EXCEPT FOR THE MEAD

#MEDIEVAL LIFE HACKS

Viking Character - Realtime UE5 by TriGon Art

@vikings-til-valhalla

i like sailing myths and superstitions because most of them can be boiled down to "if the ocean doesn't like you it will chew you up and spit out your bones. and if it really loves you it will swallow you whole and never let you go. good luck 👍"

"In 2000 years, archaeologists will still be able to tell your skeleton was male!"

False. Any credible archaeologist would be far more interested in your burial goods than in your sex. Use whatever pronouns you want, but be sure to have them bury you with 120 bronze axe heads so they know what a powerful warlord you were.