Master manipulator Ash

I was planning to write a meta on how Shorter also saved Ash’s humanity and was indeed the first to do so (and no, I’m totally NOT under the influence of @sevenflats​’ gorgeous shorash fanart) but then I realised that the main idea I had for that meta actually overlaps with what @ash-in-the-rye​ inspired me to write about power relations in Banana Fish.

Content/trigger warning: This meta discusses child sexual abuse.

All his life Ash fought against people who sought to dominate him for his beauty, intelligence and skills. While the odds were always in favour of his opponents who had resources he didn’t have, Ash made use of the very same qualities they were after to fight back. He tipped off the power balance to his favour by pretending to play the part they expected him to and caught them unawares. 

How did Ash learn to do that? Well, in the worst possible way. When he was repeatedly raped by his baseball coach in Cape Cod, he killed him to put an end to what his abuser was doing to him because the adults around him couldn’t. According to James, the guy thought he didn’t have to kill Ash like the other kids because he was paying him money. So here’s the thing. And this is really difficult to think about, let alone to put into words. Ash was only 8 years old and he knew this. He knew the money was keeping him alive. That’s why James, the genius that he is, suggested that Ash ask the guy for money in the first place. Ash also knew that as long as money was involved, the abuse would continue and there would be no way out. By then, he must have observed the guy many times and learned his routine. So one day, he took his father’s gun. 

It’s shocking to think that an 8-year-old would commit premeditated murder. The fact of the matter is that when the adults around him who should have protected him failed to do so, Ash took matters into his own hands. And he learned something from this experience: how to turn his vulnerability into an advantage.