@v8roadworrier / v8roadworrier.tumblr.com
on hold with the pest control company for work, and their hold message seriously just hit me with
"did you know there are a million ants for every human on earth? someone will be with you shortly"
i'm so afraid they're gonna connect me with my million ants
it's taking so long because they can only pick one of the million ants to take your call and all of them want a chance
such a profound sense of delight when I realize that a piece of media is matching my freak to the very letter. there are creators out there who are my exact kind of sicko and we are reaching out to each other as if across the cosmos.
unmute for the love of god please it's amazing
the Big Present for my mom this year is a coffee grinder, which is literally the only option she gave me the several times i asked for ideas
i did research on brands models etc and then just got a kitchenaid because i figure it'll last at least a couple years before she burns it out, and i love her but not enough to get a $500+ grinder which she will use a single setting on once a week
after purchasing it i discovered that i just so happen to have a mini tiny dollhouse scale box for this exact same kitchenaid coffee grinder, from one of those blind-box toy sets
they shipped the real grinder with its retail box inside of a second shipping box marked up on the outside with what is inside (which i'm sooooo annoyed at btw when i bought it i marked off "this is a gift" and "hide the packaging" and they still shipped it bare, so my mom who grabbed the box off the porch certainly saw what it is!!!!! >c )
so i'm gonna take the retail box out, wrap that, and hide it in the closet. then i'll use the shipping box, which is marked up so you know what's in there, and put the teeny tiny toy version inside. and nothing else. wrap it all pretty put it under the tree for her to open >3
actually maybe i will try to find some bricks or something to make it heavy??? idk i've got a couple hours to refine the idea, the important part is having the big empty box with this tiny shrunk version inside
alright i just dug the perfect rock out of the garden, i'll let that warm up & clean it off, and then when it's ready i will build a false bottom in the box so you don't see the rock you just feel the weight of it which adds to the joke imo
the other thought was to put a different gift inside the grinder box, and present the tiny grinder toy box wrapped up as its own present, as a double fake-out
.......but i think that is more convoluted than necessary & loses the thread of the main gag so i probably won't
omg there's actually a tiny grinder inside the box i thought it was empty aahhhh
the ONLY downside is the real one is a different color
i think everyone deserves a large rock a short distance from their home. i dont like that discussions about walkable cities never include plans to allow wider access to large rocks. the people need large rock
the Big Present for my mom this year is a coffee grinder, which is literally the only option she gave me the several times i asked for ideas
i did research on brands models etc and then just got a kitchenaid because i figure it'll last at least a couple years before she burns it out, and i love her but not enough to get a $500+ grinder which she will use a single setting on once a week
after purchasing it i discovered that i just so happen to have a mini tiny dollhouse scale box for this exact same kitchenaid coffee grinder, from one of those blind-box toy sets
they shipped the real grinder with its retail box inside of a second shipping box marked up on the outside with what is inside (which i'm sooooo annoyed at btw when i bought it i marked off "this is a gift" and "hide the packaging" and they still shipped it bare, so my mom who grabbed the box off the porch certainly saw what it is!!!!! >c )
so i'm gonna take the retail box out, wrap that, and hide it in the closet. then i'll use the shipping box, which is marked up so you know what's in there, and put the teeny tiny toy version inside. and nothing else. wrap it all pretty put it under the tree for her to open >3
actually maybe i will try to find some bricks or something to make it heavy??? idk i've got a couple hours to refine the idea, the important part is having the big empty box with this tiny shrunk version inside
alright i just dug the perfect rock out of the garden, i'll let that warm up & clean it off, and then when it's ready i will build a false bottom in the box so you don't see the rock you just feel the weight of it which adds to the joke imo
the other thought was to put a different gift inside the grinder box, and present the tiny grinder toy box wrapped up as its own present, as a double fake-out
.......but i think that is more convoluted than necessary & loses the thread of the main gag so i probably won't
the Big Present for my mom this year is a coffee grinder, which is literally the only option she gave me the several times i asked for ideas
i did research on brands models etc and then just got a kitchenaid because i figure it'll last at least a couple years before she burns it out, and i love her but not enough to get a $500+ grinder which she will use a single setting on once a week
after purchasing it i discovered that i just so happen to have a mini tiny dollhouse scale box for this exact same kitchenaid coffee grinder, from one of those blind-box toy sets
they shipped the real grinder with its retail box inside of a second shipping box marked up on the outside with what is inside (which i'm sooooo annoyed at btw when i bought it i marked off "this is a gift" and "hide the packaging" and they still shipped it bare, so my mom who grabbed the box off the porch certainly saw what it is!!!!! >c )
so i'm gonna take the retail box out, wrap that, and hide it in the closet. then i'll use the shipping box, which is marked up so you know what's in there, and put the teeny tiny toy version inside. and nothing else. wrap it all pretty put it under the tree for her to open >3
actually maybe i will try to find some bricks or something to make it heavy??? idk i've got a couple hours to refine the idea, the important part is having the big empty box with this tiny shrunk version inside
I want a beauty and the beast where he's a monster and gets cursed to be a human. And the woman comes and they fall in love and yada yada. But he gets hesitant whether he wants the curse broken because what if she thinks he's scary as his original form?! So he talks about it with her and she's like "you big doofus I love you no matter what" and he turns back and is very shy and hesitant and "what if she's scared now!?" Meanwhile she's like already taking off her clothes
i have so many hobbies and interests but each day the four horsemen (instant gratification, shortened attention span, procrastination, exhaustion) grab me by the throat and shake me until i collapse in my comfy bed
shit man tomorrow is christmas eve i swear yesterday was June 2010
As is tradition in tumblr culture the locals unearth the corpse of a long deceased figure and drag it across the streets merrily, laughing at what is preserved of the person’s words. This custom, seen as morbid in other cultures, is instead done gleefully and with an unmatched enthusiasm
what was the first type of alcohol you ever tried/drank?
TV Appreciation Week 2024 : Day 7 : Free choice → Favourite show nobody watched (Galavant)
♫ Give into the miracle that no one thought we'd get. ♫
I remain astonished that this show got the green light, much less renewed for a second season.
"Good morning! Many of you are halfway through your first week here at Greendale, and as your dean, I thought I would share a few thoughts of wisdom and inspiration."
COMMUNITY | “Pilot” Happy 15th Anniversary, September 17th, 2009.
History loves to repeat itself
god what can't dr pepper do
i understand why old-timey people thought soda was medicine this shit like crack
you vapid sluts Dr. Pepper NEVER had cocaine or laudanum or opiates in it. it was one of the original selling points
don't EVER slander my fucking GOAT you get out of this house and stay out
you little shits
