One of the funniest failures of US school system is the fact they are legally obligated to teach us all the states but they never actually show how big Alaska is like I have actually had teachers tell me that Texas is the biggest state. We have all just convinced ourselves that Alaska is that small shrunken down thing on most US maps and the people that know it's the largest state can almost never accurately describe how large it is.

For context here is a picture

what

It has a national park that’s bigger than maine. Or Switzerland. A park. 

I lived in Alaska for two years and I will never get over the sheer overwhelming bigness of it. 

Nights where the sky is clear you can see clusters of stars or the Northern Lights dancing. When the lights are rippling especially strong and fast you can hear a static crackle in the air. When the moon is out after it’s snowed, you don’t need flashlights to see. Everything glows and glimmers like polished quartz.  

But when the sky is clouded over so you can’t see the stars, you can kind of almost sense the mountains towering over you and helping to block out the light, these giant monoliths acting like this void darker than your soul. I’ve never experience night like Alaska night. 

Everything is big, the mountains, the sky, the valleys. 

And the dark. 

what the fuck

It literally looks like the mountains are coming down from the sky like the ships in Independence Day. Scary af.

i worked in alaska for a summer and it was cool as hell bc for the first two months we were above the arctic circle so it was just, daytime the whole time

for two months

like it got quite warm actually! sthg no one tells you is that oh yah ofc, when the sun is out 24hrs a day it gets warm and STAYS warm. july in alaska actually feels quite similar to august in bc or oregon and washington, temperate rainforest during the dry season and temps just gradually tick up to the 80s at midday

and like i got there mid may just a few weeks after the last snowpack melted, and left early september right before the proper snows started again — one of the bus drivers joked that "oh yeah we have all four seasons up here, winter, june july and august" — but after the sun started getting low enough to go behind the mountains and we were, not in darkness or even twilight, but in **shadow**? it snowed one night.

IN JULY.

and it got to 75 the next afternoon so it didnt last more than 12 hours but like, what. WHAT

by the end of the summer we had cycled through twilight hours to where we were just starting to have actual night again for an hour or so, and oh also all the trees started turning orange and losing their leaves. i went from full on autumn at the start of september up in denali back down to portland where it was still summer. wild transitions

anyways so also moose are about three times bigger than you think they are

This guy raised an abandoned moose calf with his Horses, and believe it or not, he has trained it for lumber removal and other hauling tasks. Given the 2,000 pounds of robust muscle, and the splayed, grippy hooves, he claims it is the best work animal he has. He says the secret to keeping the moose around is a sweet salt lick, although, during the rut he disappears for a couple of weeks, but always comes home…. Impressive !! MINNESOTA CLYDESDALE

why are moose so terrifyingly large

Because they’re pretty much legit surviving Ice Age megafauna and almost everything was bigger back then

his moose leaves for a few weeks to Fuck

Wild / Old God sighting.

Everytime the internet shows me a picture of a moose next to a car i still can never comprehend how stupid big they are

Moves as smoothly as an ocean liner.

I couldn’t tell what it was at first, but that wasn’t what I was expecting

i thought it was an otter, then i thought it was a shark, and let me say i was wrong both times

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Animal sizes for comparison

Moose

Grey Wolf

Maned Wolf

Sea Otter

Toucan

Grizzly Bear

Polar Bear

Stellar Sea Lion

Cow

Pig

Raven

Black Bear & Bengal Tiger

White-Tailed Deer

Buffalo

Capybara

me at half the animals on the post: “BITCH THAT’S H U G E”

if you’ve never seen one before

deer are smaller than you think

raccoons are bigger than you think

bears are smaller than you think but you were pretty close

otters are bigger than you think no even bigger than that

wolves are bigger than you think

wild cats are smaller than you think but hopefully you’ll never see one

chipmunks are smaller than you think

so are mice but you’ve seen a mouse right

you were right about the size of moose, mostly

pigs are bigger than you think

coyotes are that size

so are foxes

woops bears are bigger than you think but only that one type

this is an informational post about mammals if you know more please do tell

buffalo are bigger than you’ve ever even imagined. you’ve never seen anything that big in your life i promise

i support this post except you have no idea how big are moose

moose are fucked up big and nothing will ever prepare you for it

What??? The fuck????

I am from Canada and can verify that if your car hits a moose, your car will not survive but the moose likely will

Dangerous Dogs Behind “Beware Of Dog” Signs.

Joey has killed more than you can imagine.

my dog has fine antlers with rich velvet, he is a good boy

Canadian Nightmare

JESUS CHRIST WHO THE FUCK LET THAT EXIST

The Canadian regionalization DLC for Nyan Cat looks amazing.

This is nothing I wanted and yet everything I ever needed

Bless you Canada and your gigantic dinosaur snowplow monsters

Woo woo, motherfucker!

@a-mahariels-travels

Goddamned Mezolithic Megafauna’s what that is. Goddamned warranty expired on those things centuries ago, but do they care? Do they go decently extinct, like the ground sloth, gigantopethicus, or wooly rhino? Fuck that, they’re doing downhill runs on your favorite skiing course is what. Because Fuck it, is why.

Now I understand why moose are built the way they are.

It’s so they can gallop untrammelled through six-odd feet of snow.

Jesus Christ I read those mother fuckers could run 55km an hour but seeing it is another thing especially plowing through the snow

NYOOM

By your command 

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”

like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.” Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people. I’ve always said that moose hunting season is the one time of the year we’re allowed to fight back.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING

Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.

I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 

Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 

Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.

Moose. MOOSE.

Yea. I keep hearing people be like “bears! You gotta watch out for the bears in Canada!” and I keep saying no. You don’t understand the terror that is inspired by the moose.

I almost hit a moose while skiing once… fucking terrifying she was so pretty though

Moose are terrifying is the general consensus I got from all this shit. Good job, Canada.

a moose is like two horses wearing a horse costume

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”

like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.” Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people. I’ve always said that moose hunting season is the one time of the year we’re allowed to fight back.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night. Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING

Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.

I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah. 

Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month. 

Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.

Moose. MOOSE.

Y’know from a certain point of view moose ARE deer sized.

They’re just “biggest fucking living deer species in the world”-deer sized

jared stop bothering those people

Context: top picture is a logging road.

Country folk, let it sink in

I always forget how big these motherfuckers are.

HASEEB 

wait can you ride these? Can me & my Canadian husband ride these into our snowy wedding ceremony (because you know how it’s always snowing in Canadia?)?