The Bear
I sometimes glimpse bits of steam
some fault in the old snow
and bend close and see it is lung-coloured
the chilly, enduring odour of bear.
I take a wolf’s rib and whittle
and freeze it in blubber and place it out
on the fairway of the bears.
I move out on the bear tracks,
until I come to the first, tentative, dark
running, following the splashes
of blood wandering over the world.
At the cut, gashed resting places
where he lay out on his belly
to overpass some stretch of bauchy ice
dragging myself forward with bear-knives in my fists.
On the third day I begin to starve,
at nightfall I bend down as I knew I would
at a turd sopped in blood,
and hesitate, and pick it up,
and thrust it in my mouth, and gnash it down,
living by now on bear blood alone,
I can see his upturned carcass far out ahead, a scraggled,
the heavy fur riffling in the wind.
and stare at the narrow-spaced, petty eyes,
face laid back on the shoulder, the nostrils
perhaps the first taint of me as he
a ravine in his thigh, and eat and drink,
and tear him down his whole length
and open him and climb in
and close him up after me, against the wind,
stabbed twice from within,
splattering a trail behind me,
splattering it out no matter which way I lurch,
no matter which parabola of bear-transcendence,
which dance of solitude I attempt,
which gravity-clutched leap,
which trudge, which groan.
Until one day I totter and fall—
stomach that has tried so hard to keep up,
to digest the blood as it leaked in,
and digest the bone itself: and now the breeze
the hideous belches of ill-digested bear blood
and the ordinary, wretched odour of bear,
my sore, lolled tongue a song
or screech, until I think I must rise up
and dance. And I lie still.
I awaken I think. Marshlights
come trailing again up the flyway.
In her ravine under old snow the dam-bear
and drizzly eyes into shapes
hairy-soled trudge stuck out before me,
the rest of my days I spend
was that sticky infusion, that rank flavour of blood, that poetry, by which I lived?