king of the lost boys

i am but an old man and tumblr is my porch

*gets 2 notes on a post* i am beloved

there goes the dumbest bitch that this town has ever seen

Head not empty, head filled with the same song on repeat over and over for like a week

i express all of my emotions by saying “fuck” in varying tones

I have the lower back of a 62 year old man and the mind of an infant

I may be exhausted and broke but at least I’m gay

Never related to anything else more

friend: you should watch that

me: i definitely will!

narrator: she never watched it

i wanna talk about it but i really dont wanna talk about it

Imagine finishing a show and moving on with your life. Can’t relate.

mark fuckerburg

slap your balls and die

at this point comedy is a moving target and im just flailing my arms in a vain hope to hit it

I hate when people ask me how I’m doin  I’m fuckin terrible thanks for reminding me.