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#jaehyun angst – @trashlord-007 on Tumblr
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Did I ever tell you the definition... of insanity?

@trashlord-007 / trashlord-007.tumblr.com

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byeolhyesisi

When I Kissed You Goodbye; JUNG JAEHYUN

You finally had the courage to read the letter he left you before he kissed you goodbye.

genre: angst, mafia!jaehyun x reader au, short fic

words: 1,3k+ words

To my dahlia,

When I kissed you goodbye...

I regretted it.

You knew I was no good for you but you didn't care. I tried to push you away but you keep on coming back until I was fond of your presence and until I was in love. In our relationship I realized maybe I was actually harsh on myself and to you. Why was I trying to shut myself away from the world? Why did I try to discard my emotions and act like an emotionless doll? I cherish every moment with you and it will be with me 'til the day I die. You loved me and I felt it every second of our everyday. It was timeless, I don't want to let go of that moment. You made me feel alive, as if there was something more for me. In a world that is nothing but darkness I was used to isolation. It was a bland world filled with shades of grey but you somehow made it all ok. You brought color to my life. You painted my everyday and brought a smile to my face. I was mad in love to the point I adore every detail of you. I love the way you smile, the way you laugh, the way you pout, even the way you snore softly in your sleep. I never thought that I would be able to feel this way and I will be forever grateful that you were the reason for this.

But who knew it wouldn't last forever? The day I left, I cried like there was no tomorrow. I didn't want to leave you but I had no choice. I hated seeing you in tears, I hated seeing you in pain and I hated seeing you become a mess because of me. Why did you fall for a person who had many enemies willing to kill everyone I loved? Out of all the people in the world you chose me who was just going to put your life at stake. I forgot there was a reason to my emotionless self and that was because I didn't want to see people who are dear to me die. I hope you understand that I only wanted to keep you safe even if it meant that I had to lose you. Forget about me if you must. But I just want you to know that I will never erase you from my mind and from my heart.

I love you. I'll always will.

From yours truly,

Jung Jaehyun.

a/n: the velvet series will start soon i promise, have a short angst for now 😔

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