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Transgender Teen Survival Guide

@transgenderteensurvivalguide / transgenderteensurvivalguide.com

We are a blog created for people of all ages who have questions concerning their gender identity. Read our FAQ here!
Transgender is an umbrella term that is inclusive of, but not limited to (nor forced upon), trans women, trans men, non-binary people, genderfluid people, genderqueer people, agender people, and anyone who doesn't identify as the gender assigned to them at birth.
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The Masterpost of Resources for female-at-birth Agender People who want Bottom Surgery

So, this is going to be a long post. But it’s necessary. Lots of agender people are able to get top surgery, but I never see anything about bottom surgery. Feel free to signal boost and spread around to help your agender friends. There are no other resources out there like this aside from 1 that I’ve once reblogged where the OP deactivated and all links were broken. This post won’t have any links other than for sources, so that way even if my blog ever becomes deactivated, the information will still be there. As a bigender person I feel such a sense of solidarity with my agender siblings. Peoples misunderstanding and refusal to help you treat your dysphoria absolutely breaks my heart. If I’m allowed to want both parts, you should be allowed to want neither. You are not broken or sick for being agender. You are absolutely valid, and this post is for you. I’ve been planning it for months, and it took a lot of research, but it’s still not going to be perfect, so please feel free to correct any misinformation, and add information on agender bottom surgery in other countries (as this post is very U.S.-centric).

That being said, what DOES agender bottom surgery look like? From how I’ve had it described to me, it involves wanting to look completely flat or “blank” in your bottom area. And how is this done? There are a few different possible surgeries that could be used to complete this look:

-partial clitoridectomy (removel of clitoral hood)

-complete clitoridectomy (removal of clitoral glans + hood)

-clitoroplexy(will make the clitoris smaller)

-clitoral hood reduction (will make the clitoral hood smaller)

-labioplasty(reduction/alteration of the labia)

-vulvectomy/excision (removel of labia)

-infibulation (sowing together of labia)

-complete hysterectomy (removel of uterus/ovaries-necessary for vaginectomy)

-vaginectomy(bye bye vagina)

Clitoridectomy/Clitoroplexy/Clitoral Hood Reduction

A complete clitoridectomy involves the complete removal of the clitoris (an organ that is mostly internal and partially external). It’s illegal in many places due to the fact that it is commonly used as a part of female circumcision. I absolutely don’t support the mutilation of infants body parts for any reason, and fully believe in peoples rights to make their own decisions when they are old enough to. From what I understand, the law banning FGM of 1996 (which was recently declared unconsitutional and appealed by the house of representatives as of November 20, 2018, yikes) only specifies that it bans it for people under 18, however, because of how it is often used, (as a way of mutilating babies rather than a choice for adults) it’s extremely hard to find clinics willing to do it because of the horrible connotations. According to Docdoc.com:

“Under medical use, the clitoris may be cut if it is necrotic (or the tissue is dead) due to poor or failure of blood supply to the organ, the signs of which may begin to show on the outer lips of the vagina. It may also have to be removed if the clitoris or the organs and tissues near it have been damaged due to traumatic injury or if the patient is diagnosed with reproductive cancer, which may require the resection of certain parts to control, reduce, or prevent the spread of the disease.

One of the common reasons for the procedure is clitoris hypertrophy, which means the clitoris has become enlarged due a number of possible reasons including the intake of certain drugs or congenital adrenal hyperplasia (CAH), where the adrenal glands found near the kidneys produce either too much or very little of the sex hormone.”

If you want a clitoridectomy done, and you don’t have what qualifies as the usual medical reasons, a diagnosis of gender dysphoria may be essential when convincing a doctor to perform a clitoridectomy on you. The only place I know of that openly treats nonbinary people is the Mazonni Center located in Philadelphia. From there they may be able to get you in contact with doctors willing to write notes confirming that you are dysphoric and that this is something that is absolutely medically necessary.

Please be informed that the clitoris is a sex organ, and is used for pleasure. Many people report no longer being able to orgasm after the removal of the clitoris [source]. If sexual pleasure is something that’s important to you, and you find that you’re unable to acheive orgasm mentally/vaginally/ect. and don’t want to risk losing the ability to orgasm, it’s okay to reconsider. Due to most of the clitoris being internal, it MAY be possible to only remove the external part so that one can still feel sexual pleasure while still appearing mostly flat down there, however I was unable to find any information on this. If you have an open-minded surgeon, this may be something to talk to them about. Another POSSIBLE option is a process known as infibulation-the sowing together of the labia. Again, I could not find any information on if a clitoridectomy is necessary to get an infibulation, but it is one possible way of achieving “flatness” down there without the possibility of losing the ability to feel sexual pleasure.

Because of the terrible reputations of a clitoridectomy and the horrible way it is used, I was unable to locate a single clinic openly stating that they are willing to do so.

Clitoroplexy and clitoral hood reduction are usually done by plastic surgeons on adult women for aesthetic reasons. They are another possible solution for agender people unable to find a surgeon as they can help to make that area appear flatter, and it *may* be more likely for someone who already does genital surgeries to be willing to do a clitoridectomy.

(Please feel free to add on to this with more areas you were able to find willing to perform these procedures. I will edit the original post to include the information as I’m made aware)

Labioplasty/Excision(vulvectomy)/Infibulation

Like before, excision and infibulation are practices that sadly are done as a form of mutilating infants. Again I don’t support any unnecessary medical procedure before someone is old enough to make that decision for themselves. Regardless of religion or culture, it is unethical to have circumcision done on someone who cannot consent to it.

In the west, excision is used as one form of vulvectomy. It’s primarily done as a way of removing cancer. According to cancer.org, there are 4 main types of vulvectomy (I have omitted the first due to it only removing the top layer of skin on the vulva, thus not being a relevant resource for agender people)

“In a simple vulvectomy, the entire vulva is removed (the inner and outer labia; sometimes the clitoris, too) as well as tissue just under the skin.

partial or modified radical vulvectomy removes part of the vulva, including the deep tissue.

In a complete radical vulvectomy, the entire vulva and deep tissues, including the clitoris, are removed. A complete radical vulvectomy rarely needed.”

You may notice that oftentimes in a vulvectomy a (partial?- it doesn’t specify how much of the clitoris)clitoridectomy is performed as well. It appears to be reserved for cancer patients, but I was able to find a clinic willing to do it for “aesthetic” reasons.

Unfortunately, almost all of these surgies are considered “cosmetic” so if you needed your insurances to cover them you would, at the very least, need one or several reccomendations from doctors confirming that you are dysphoric and that these are life-saving surgeries for you.

Infibulation is sadly used as a part of FGM in order to make the vaginal opening smaller;the labia sown together partially cover some of the vaginal opening. I am unable to find any clinic openly willing to perform it due to the horrible way its used. If you are with an open-minded surgeon it may be possible to discuss. Again you’d probably need an explicit reccomendation from a doctor due to the connotations of this practice.

Labioplasty is a more common practice, and is usually done by cis women for aesthetic reasons. It means reducing the labia, rather than complete removal, however, a doctor who already does labioplasty *may* be more willing to do a complete removal. It’s such a common practice that I don’t even need to add a list of clinics where it’s available, which is good, since it means this post will be a little shorter.

Hysterectomies

This is a big one, since without a hysterectomy, you cannot have a vaginectomy due to there being nowhere for the blood to escape during your menstrual cycle. It’s also a very hard one to get. There are countless stories from cis women whose doctors refused to perfrom/refer them for a hysterectomy, because they “might change [their] mind and want kids in the future”. For trans men on the other hand, there seems to be less difficulty with these. Possibly due to the health effects of being on testosterone for an extended period of time making your more likely to develope ovarian cancer. In fact, the clinic where I have my phalloplasty consultation lists a hysterectomy as a requirement for having surgery (although, I may attempt to negotiate this, since I am already off testosterone meaning there is less cancer risk).

If you’re between the ages of 40-45, or have been on testosterone/can pass as a trans man, you shouldn’t have much trouble finding a doctor willing to do a hysterectomy. However if you’re young, it may be difficult if you don’t have some sort of pre-existing condition such as endometriosis to “justify” it. I was unable to find any advice from young people with no “justifiable” condition on how they got hysterectomies, nor was I able to find any comprehensive list or links to clinics willing to do them. Whether they’re just that rare, or I’m searching with the wrong keywords, I don’t know. I urge people who have experience or advice in this area to reach out, and I will edit this post accordingly. Definitely reach out to your gender therapist if you have one for a letter of reccomendation, it could go a long way in convincing a surgeon you are sure you want this procedure, and won’t change your mind.

Vaginectomy

This is pretty much exactly what it sounds like. A full vaginectomy (Colpectomy + Colpocleisis) is almost exclusively done on trans men during bottom surgery and the only clinic I could find that even mentions colpocleisis without phalloplasty or metiodioplasty is here and even then it’s specified that its treatment for a prolapse, so I have no idea if an agender person would be able to get surgery there. It’s highly unlikely without a note from a gender clinic.

This is the most information I could gather on possible surgeries for agender people. I am genuinely sorry I couldn’t find any more than this. Hopefully if you’re an agender person this post showed you some options or at the very least gave you some hope. This post is by no means complete and I am 1000% open to suggestions and correcting any misinformation (as long as the corrections are sourced). I encourage you to do your own research and share it so I can edit this post accordingly. Feel free to signal boost and spread this around to give the word to any agender person this may help.

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Anonymous asked:

Anytime I mention wanting a meta I get mocked by people because the results would mean I can't penetrate a partner. I don't really care about that one con, but now I'm worried I won't be able to find a partner if I get a meta. Will getting a meta mean nobody will want to date me?

Kii says:

I don’t think so. Not everyone likes or wants penetrative sex, and a lot of people who do like penetrative sex also like other kinds of sex. You’ll just have to work through you and your partner’s wants and find a solution you’re both happy with.

Lee says:

The other thing is getting a meta doesn’t mean you can’t give your partner penetrative sex. 

You could use something like The Hot Rod on top of your penis or or you could get a pack n play that has enough room for your penis and use that as a strap on. And you can hold a dildo and penetrate your partner, or use your fingers.

So if your partner wants penetrative sex, you don’t necessarily need to have biological genitals capable of penetrating them to still fill that need.

And, if it helps any, I’ve met multiple guys who have gotten a meta and still have hookups and/or long term partners.

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Anonymous asked:

I haven’t saw this anywhere but how long did it take for the Stiches/stables to be removed after bottom surgery? I want to know because I’ll have to be careful during that time after surgery

Kii says:

When asking questions about bottom surgery, please state what surgical procedures you’re referring to, or we’re not able to provide you with the most accurate information.

If you need language to help ask your question, check out the following:

Lee says:

You should ask your surgeon how long they think the stitches will be in, and whether you need to get them removed (and how many weeks post-op should you see someone to do that) or if they’ll dissolve, and when to expect that.

But your surgeon will also tell you what activity limitations you should follow (ie no exercising for X amount of time, no baths until Y has happened, etc) and you should base your activities on those instructions rather than when you have stitches.

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Anonymous asked:

I'm researching different types of metoidioplasty and I'm confused. Is there a type that would give me clitoral release and urethral lengthening without sctrotoplasty? Also, could external surgery happen at the same time as a hysterectomy, or would they have to happen separately?

Lee says:

Yes, you can get a UL and clitoral release without scrotoplasty, but you usually need a vaginectomy if you get a UL. So you can opt out of creating a scrotum and balls, but you usually do have to close the vagina.

It’s possible to get a meta at the same time as a hysto- with some surgeons. The lower surgeon I’m going to see said to have a hysto first, which I did, and I think most lower surgeons prefer that you have the hysterectomy before you get lower surgery. But it depends on who you see, so you should ask your surgical team about that when you have a consultation. 

More info on both: 

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Anonymous asked:

So, I know trans guys can't make sperm, but can they get boners? Cuz I hate the idea of being bottom, but idk if I can f*ck

Kii says:

From here

How does a penis get erect after phallo?

  • You can choose to have another stage of surgery around 9 months after the first stage of phallo to get an implant that will enable you to have a rigid penis for sex.
  • Without an implant, your penis will be flaccid all the time, but don’t worry- you can still orgasm.
  • There are two type of implant- inflatable pumps and semi-rigid rods.
  • The pumps allow you to go from flaccid to hard, and the rods are always hard but you can position them downwards in the flaccid position.
  • The rod implants usually last longer than the pumps because there are less moving parts so it’s harder for something to go wrong. You still can lose the implant though if there’s an infection or it extrudes and pokes out of where it should be.
  • More info- Can you still get an erection after phalloplasty?
  • More info- Penile implants guide
  • Video- This and this are NSFW videos of someone with phallo and a pump implant getting hard, do not click on the links if you’re under 18 or don’t want to see genitals
  • Personal experience- Pump vs. Rod- How I decided
  • Personal experience- 1 Year w/ My Semi Rigid Erectile Device
  • If you don’t get an implant, you can use devices like the Erektor, The Elater, the Stays-Hard, and the Reversible Sheath to penetrate your partner during sex.
  • More info- Insertion Of Penile Implant

Lee says:

Since this segment from my new Bottom surgery (genital surgery) page which you should totally read only addresses phallo:

If you get a meta, you can have unassisted spontaneous erections like a cis man would have, it’s just that your penis is smaller.

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Anonymous asked:

is it transphobic to not like having sex with a trans girl? i would definitely date a trans girl, its just that i wouldn't have sex with one because im afraid their genitalia. the same goes for cis guys, i would date one but im really afraid of their genitalia. is that transphobic?

Kii says:

I mean, the fact that you’re assuming you know what the genitalia of every trans girl looks like is pretty transphobic, because intersex trans girls exist and trans girls who have had bottom surgery exist. Trans guys who are intersex or have had bottom surgery also exist, so you literally have no clue who has a penis unless you’ve asked someone or seen them naked. 

There are also many different ways of having sex no matter what genitalia you or your partner have. Ultimately no one, including me, should be pressuring you to have sex with someone if you’re uncomfortable with it, but it’s definitely good to figure out what specifically makes you uncomfortable- is it penises themselves, or a specific sex act (ex: p-in-v sex)? Once you know what you’re uncomfortable with, you can figure out ways to discuss that with any potential partners in a way that explains how you feel without making them feel like there’s anything wrong with their bodies.

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Anonymous asked:

Is vaginal atrophy only noticeable during penetration and stuff or can you like feel it/do you notice it all the time too?

Kii says:

Atrophy can be noticed outside of penetration. Here’s a post with more information about it.

Lee says:

It depends on the amount of atrophy. I’m about 11 months on T and I have some vaginal atrophy, so I sometimes bleed during penetration, but I never notice it outside of having sex.

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azuraspyte

Finished the first packer. I had to completely redo the pattern I had. But I think it looks pretty good.

Willing to send one of these out to any trans guy in need for only the price of shipping. I also plan on putting the pattern up on a blogspot (for free) with ads and a PayPal donate link so that i can buy yarn to make more and possibly send out some to trans men who cant afford shipping.

If you’re interested in one let me know by ask or fanmail. If you would like one for cosplay purposes i plan on selling ones for $10 on etsy as well.

Thanks @transgenderteensurvivalguide for reviving this post! If you would kindly help circulate this update I would really appreciate it!

There’s been a lot of renewed interest in these and I’d be more than happy to make these to those who’ve contacted me, or have contacted me in the past. I’ve been inactive for some time and havent been very responsive to some requests.

I’ve unfortunately misplaced the pattern, however I’d be more than happy to recreate it (I did it once I’ll figure it out again) and post an updated picture for you guys.

As this post is old and I’m just reopening my shop I will need to change the prices and I’m no longer able to provide them for free, however, if there are enough purchases I can likely start doing that as well. I will also provide the pattern as well as a step by step guide on how to make it for free.

I believe it will take me roughly a week to create the pattern and make a batch of packers to sell but feel free to continue to send requests and I’ll be in contact as soon as I can.

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Anonymous asked:

Does testosterone make you grow a penis?

Kii says:

Lee says:

If you actually want to see a picture of genitals on T this NSFW post has you covered: https://datgenderqueerboi.tumblr.com/post/171747488759/genital-growth-isnt-something-you-can-opt-out-of

Sidenote: I’m actually doing an anonymous survey on clitoral growth right now! Any assigned female at birth person can fill it out. If you want to see the range of sizes possible, take the survey and you can see everyone else’s responses at the end.

I’d really appreciate any reblogs of the post if you don’t fill it out yourself since I’m trying to get as large of a sample size as I can.

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Anonymous asked:

I really want to go on T (I’m FTM trans) but I’m extremely nervous about genital growth, I’m also not sure if I ever want to get bottom surgery because there are a load of risks.

Kii says:

I just answered a nearly identical question here. If you sent both of these questions, please remember to not re-ask the same question unless it’s urgent!

Lee says:

Kii didn’t answer about lower surgery, but basically there are different types of lower surgery with different risks. I plan on getting just a clitoral release at some point and that has way fewer complications than a phallo with a urethral lengthening, for example. Also remember that some complications can be fixed. Phallo often has multiple stages of surgery and if you get a complication in the first stage, they’ll fix it in the second stage.

In the end, getting lower surgery is your choice- if you don’t feel comfortable with the risks involved then you don’t need to do it.

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Anonymous asked:

hey! i'm ftm trans and i I'm thinking of taking t but i'm really scared of genital changes and i really don't want them to happen at all. what should i do?

Kii says:

Unfortunately, you can’t pick and choose which testosterone effects you want. The genital changes will happen if you take T no matter what. If you are very strongly against them, maybe T isn’t the best option for you, but if you think this is something you can get over with time and/or deal with until you can get bottom surgery, then T might still be an option for you. However, we can’t make that decision for you.

Lee says:

To clarify what Kii said about bottom surgery: getting lower surgery probably won’t be able to return your genitals to how they were pre-t, you’d be getting a penis created.

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Anonymous asked:

(Nsfw ask) Is it normal to not want to be touched down there? I'm ftm and like, the thought of anyone touching my genitalia, sexually or not, is really uncomfortable, and I just feel like, really weird at the thought of that. Even if I had my bits were the ones that I feel I should have, which is a penis, it justs makes me wanna back out like 'oh hell naw.' Is it dysphoria, or something else? (Like asexuality, for example.)

Kii says:

It might be sex repulsion, which often is brought up alongside asexuality but is not exclusive to people who identify as asexual. You can read more about that at @sex-repulsed (but obvious content warnings for talking about sex).

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Anonymous asked:

(nsfw???) hey so i want to start T as a nb/trans masc guy, and im fine with almost all of the effects and want them to happen to me except for the bottom growth. I know that you can't pick and choose, but thats just something that bothers me. id much rather have ambiguous genitals. idk.

Lee says:

I’m not sure what you’d view as ambiguous genitals or if you mean you see your current genitals as being ambiguous, but you could get a simple meta once you’ve had lower growth and keep your vaginal opening so you’d basically have a small penis and also a vagina which is sort of ambiguous. 

You sent more of a statement than a question, so I don’t know exactly what type of response you’re looking for but hopefully that helps!

Sidenote: I’m actually doing an anonymous survey on clitoral growth right now! Any assigned female at birth person can fill it out. If you want to see the range of sizes possible, take the survey and you can see everyone else’s responses at the end.

I’d really appreciate any reblogs of the post if you don’t fill it out yourself since I’m trying to get as large of a sample size as I can.

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Anonymous asked:

Quick question. I was afab but I’m a trans man. Is my sex still female or is that now male? I always thought gender was who you are but sex could not be changed. But I was talking to my partner about it last night (who is also a trans man) and he believes that since he identifies as a guy he is a male.

Kii says:

Sex is a social construct, so you can identify however you like. Some trans guys identify their sex as female unless/until they get bottom surgery, some identify their sex as male because they identify as a man, and some always identify their sex as female. (And these identity choices exist for people of all genders; it was just easier to give a specific example)

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Anonymous asked:

Hi! (Bottom surgery warning) so I may or may not want to get a phallo surg in the future, but I also want tattoos, so I was wondering if I were to get the surgery, if I would choose what arm the skin graph comes from? I don’t want t doctors picking the wrong one and having a bunch of tattoos on my penis :/

Kii says:

Different doctors have their own preferred skin graft locations, but I also highly doubt a doctor would encourage you to get a skin graft from tattooed skin because it would ruin the tattoos and likely wouldn’t give very aesthetically pleasing results. Unless your un-tattooed arm has scars or other characteristics that would make it not ideal, I can’t imagine a doctor having a preferred arm? There are also locations other than arms to get skin grafts from. You can also just get tattoos in other places until your surgery.

Lee says:

While I agree a doctor wouldn’t specifically encourage a phallo patient to get a skin graft from tattooed skin, I have seen phallo results from people who have tattoos on their phallus because both arms were tattooed and I think that it’s rude to say that it isn’t aesthetically pleasing bc that’s someone’s body, and if they’re happy with their results then that’s all that matters. It’s okay to say “I wouldn’t want tattoos on my phallus” but not okay to say it looks bad and judge other’s bodies. It’s really important to be extra careful in what language you use when you’re discussing someone’s body, especially when discussing phallo since people sometimes disparage other’s results.

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