my fish army is ever-growing

in the anthropomorphized world i have just envisioned it’s rude to call animals of male and female gender “man” or “woman” because those are Human gender terms and animals dont have identical gender experiences. so u have to call a male goose a “gander” and a female horse a “mare”

they would come up with a species-neutral gender term for male and female too, maybe something like “wer” and “wif,” to honor the old english words for male and female humans & play on the “werewolf” concept. so a man and a bull are both weres, and a woman and a cow are both wifs. and any animal that doesn’t have a gender term uses those ones too

they have the nastiest cross-species gender discourse you could imagine.

2025.1.9

not gay not bisexual but developing a new sinister sexuality where im looney toons level obsessed with a single guy and put him into contraptions

One of my co-workers has a standing desk that he uses sitting down. It looks like this

i cant stop saying "grisp it"

As far as Pokemon trainers go I'm basically a huge badass. Any kid who enters my line of sight is going to get destroyed by my Pidgey. And if that doesn’t work? I have a second Pidgey with the exact same move set.

i wish depriving yourself of food and sleep wasn't seen as fun and quirky. like listen man i get it, you tell people how little you survive on and they go "omg you're crazy how are you standing!!" and you feel cool and special. but it's not worth it dude. sleep more than 4 hours before class. have more for breakfast than a single coffee. please.

he goes from beanie baby to hammerhead shark so quick

went to an art exhibition and the artist was drawing a self-portrait dressed up as a dog and i wish this was my job so fucking bad

tested positive for needing a kiss

cats being capable of understanding accidents and even giving you a little head bonk to let you know you're still cool makes it infinitely funnier that they don't understand when you're trying to help them

cats when you step on their tail: i'll admit that was rather ouchie, but given the lifetime of goodwill and trust between us, one must conclude this booboo is but a fluke.

cats when you try to get their claws unstuck from the couch covering: this nefarious bitch has never had a single honorable intention in their dishonest and shameful life, this must be one of their sinister plots or perhaps even an attempt on my life,

it should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. like no i shut it off and back on again why are you still here

is the ocarina (light blue) too much?