i'm a writer irl (can't say who because my agent would put me into a blender and press go) and honestly the funniest and most humiliating incident of my life was the time my finished manuscript triggered a plagiarism flag with the publisher for two lines of prose in my literary fiction novel...

.... which was word for word similar to a paragraph in a certain explicit work on FFN starring elrond and his batsman from the hobbit films, aka that one elf that looked like he ate panic attacks for breakfast (i forget his name but it's Figwit II) where the lord of imladris bends said twink over his writing desk and gives him the battering ram treatment.

and if you think i had to sit in front of one if the biggest publishing companies in the world and admit that it was, in fact, me who wrote the fic where the lord of imladris bends said twink over his writing desk and gives him the battering ram treatment in order to avoid being wrongly flagged for plagiarism, you would be absolutely correct.

(yes they published the book)

This takes a lot of courage in a lot of important ways good job OP

this is so funny to me theyre talking about him like they strapped a gopro to a dog

@anon here's one I took last week that's a bit better

MANKEY??

How do they choose which sand to be the glass and which sand to be the sand in an hourglass... Imagine you and your best friend were two grains of sand and you had to be in the hourglass and your bestie had to be the glass. Ur together but youve never been more apart. A Sick and twisted practice hourglassery is...

This was me off 1 chocolate croissant

This is a documented thing! It occurs most often with hearts but can happen with any transplanted organ. It's called 'cellular memory' and I wrote a whole paper on it during my freshman year of uni. It's also why some transplant recipients experience new preferences, thoughts, and sometimes behaviors their donor was known to have. Like favourite foods or drinks, subtle changes in personality (like becoming a bit more daring, etc), and more. It's usually temporary as the organ adjusts to its new person's preferences, experiences, habits, etc. It's fascinating and awesome and I would love to study it in-depth someday.

Which is why I want all of my organs upon death given to the same person. Hostile takeover from within.

I'm just trying to figure out what situation would require multiple organ transplants all at once.

Doctor: well the bad news is that all of your everything is fucked. The good news is that someone with an odd final request just died

i love tiktok comment sections

go white boy goooo

no white boy not like that

white boy i've never seen anyone fuck it up like that

truly the only way to get through to audio terrorists

not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]

How does it feel to ask for a drink and instead you get a whole artistic experience.

this can’t be real

He put them together at the kids table that doesn’t exist I’m fucking crying

This had the tradwife tag and I’m dying

omg this is heavy skills here. She completely maintains the format of a trad tiktok, the tone and whispered voice, all while completely reversing the plot. Reeses should fucking pay her, this is the best ad they'll ever get.

20th Century Marriage Discussion…