in the dark there is discovery

He killed them

justin mcelroy has said many powerful things but honestly no set of words in the english language conveys the same energy as “that’s a funny trick to play on god”

[Video description: Sydnee McElroy opening a door to the bathroom of a hotel room. Inside is Justin, blowdrying a piece of cheesecake. He smiles and continues to do so, accidentally blowing a plastic fork into the sink. Sydnee motions for him to stop and says “You want to explain what you’re doing here?” Justin replies “The cheesecake’s frozen.” Sydnee starts to say something, but is cut off by Justin restarting the hairdryer.]

justin what the ever living fuck

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One of the funniest things in the world to me is that comedy podcaster/video game journalist Justin Mcelroy will occasionally get emails intended for Crime/Politics Vancouver reporter Justin Mcelroy

an update

sydnee is so fucking funny I Cannot Even Believe

justin be like: *wheeze* *unintelligible babble* *unholy squeal*

Justin’s (at the time) 2-year-old daughter decides to fight the moon

Justin: What about–?

Charlie: Fire is hot.

Justin: Fire is hot, that’s a great point. Salient and well-made.

Charlie: [singing] Mister sun, sun! Mister golden sun, please shine down on me!

Justin: Oh, the sun. [Charlie sings the same lines again] What do you think about the sun?

Charlie: It’s shining bright!

Justin: Mm-hmm. When does the sun come out?

Charlie: First–it–lights up the day!

Justin: And when does the moon come out?

Charlie: It’s at night.

Justin: What happens when the moon comes out during the day? [long pause] Now, I noticed you’re balling your fists up. What is that for?

Charlie: [long, high-pitched noise of consideration] Punch it!

Justin: You’re gonna punch the moon. [Charlie: Yeah!] Why?

Charlie: Because we’re knights!

Justin: We’re knights? [Charlie: Yeah.] Okay.

Charlie: Come on, Daddy, let’s fight the moon! [muffling sounds as she gets down]

Justin: Well. Um, I’m not sure we should fight the moon. It’s a very long way away. I’m–would– [Charlie babbles about the moon in the distance] Where’s the moon? Okay, she’s left the room. [Charlie makes punching sound effects in the distance] [Justin starts laughing] Can you punch the moon here, in the room with the microphone?

Charlie: [at a distance] Come on, Mommy!

Justin: Well, I guess that’s gonna do it for us. Um, is there anything else you’d like to say?

Charlie: Um…well. Look! Up there!

Justin: What do you see?

Charlie: On the bookshelf! [Justin: Uh-huh?] Look. There’s a present up there!

Justin: There’s a present up there? I don’t think so.

Charlie: Who is it?

Justin: You’re just…taking your headphones off now. Oh no, they’re falling apart. Okay, well let’s say goodbye. Say “bye-bye, Mommy.”

Charlie: Bye-bye, Mommy.

Sydnee: [at a slight distance] Bye-bye!

Charlie: Uh, that was a great podcast we did! Bye-bye, Daddy!

Justin: [laughing] Bye-bye, Charlie.

Charlie: We’re gonna punch the moon! [Justin bursts into laughter]

Computer, enhance

There’s only one jumpscare you’ll see on my blog this spooky season

Justin’s TV Looks™

Clint, Justin, Griffin, and Travis for EW