I was gonna say “what you think he had insurance???” but 1) at least in the early aughts to mid-teens, NY was one of the less excruciating states to get medicaid in, and 2) he was a minor and it’s a LOT easier to get medicaid for a minor, especially when said minor’s legal guardians are retirees on fixed incomes I’d wager.
So yeah they’re all just fuckin dumbasses! I love them.
This is why I think it would be peak comedy for the radioactive spider to be of a non-venomous species and for there to be a scene of a new Peter Parker/Spiderperson looking up the spider’s features or posting a photo to an identification subbredit before being informed of the fact that nothing will happen
entemologist reddit: oh yeah, that one’s venom isn’t strong enough to cause anything other than a bit of localized pain at the bite site, no worries.
Peter Parker the next morning, stuck to his ceiling: Well someone fucking LIED!!!!
Peter Parker typing out an angry internet rant to send back to the entomologist about “this is fucking bullshit I feel like ass I walked into six walls and I’m sweating fucking GLUE”
People keep asking him for updates and he does two more before deciding to become a superhero and deleting his reddit account
Six weeks later someone else posts about how “so that one spider bite guy. The one who kept. Sticking to walls. And this, uh. New hero guy. Climbing walls. Spiderman. Connected?”
