@thesunflowersqueen / thesunflowersqueen.tumblr.com
My friend sometimes brings her six-year-old to our DnD sessions and my husband (the DM) lets her roll for all enemy attacks and sometimes he will show her a few figures and let her secretly pick what creature we meet next. Who needs encounter tables when you have a first-grader around
She cheers when the monster is winning.
DM: *places an ugly, slavering, repugnant, spine-tingling creature on the battle map*
Child who can barely see over the table: ᵗʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ᵐᵉ :)
I’ve been thinking about this daily since it crossed my dash
little mans is 100% correct.
I'm gonna put I AM BRAVE OF THIS MEETING on my cubicle wall at work and never explain it.
Think about the donuts of your day!
Before COVID shut the library down, I was helping a little boy and his mom find books.
“What do you like to read about?” I asked. “Dinosaurs!” This is common request, but can mean different things, “Okay. Do you want a story about dinosaurs, or facts about dinosaurs?” “Facts.” I took him to the dinosaur section (567.9) of the juvenile nonfiction. He picked out a couple books, and I asked him if there was anything else he was looking for. “Do you have anything on DNA?” I had to think about that for a second. “I think so…but I’ll have to look it up.” The boy beamed, “I want to find out how DNA works, so I can bring them back!” “We just saw Jurassic Park,” his mom explained with a smile that did not waver when she added, “We didn’t learn anything.”
Certified Library Post
so when i was at camp we had a dress up superhero day and so i dressed up as black widow but like super cheaply (cheap wig, black leggings, black jacket) so it takes most ppl a second to figure out what i’m going for anyway i ran into a little girl who loved my costume and after a brief conversation it transpired it was because she was under the impression that i was ariel. i was like oh cool yeah that makes sense, how did you guess? expecting her to be like “the hair!” and she gave me this ‘duh’ look and said “it’s her costume from the avengers” because she’s under the impression that the little mermaid is also the black widow and i love her and the world she must live in
oh my god
Today one of my students threw a stuffed animal across the room and it landed directly in a plate filled with paint
And I had it narrowed down to a few kids but no one would confess so I made them all put their toys away and have five minutes of quiet time to Reflect on Their Behavior
During that five minutes of relative silence, this group of three year olds INVENTED A NEW CLASSMATE, named him, and unanimously blamed him for throwing the toy across the room
There was not a single weak link, they were all ride or die
Unreal
I was talking to a kid in my daughter’s class today, and she said that she thought it would be fun to write a story about the Titanic, but with supernatural creatures.
So I said, “Yeah, that would great! What would the creatures do? Would they save the Titanic from sinking?”
And she gave me the most disgusted look. I have never seen a 9 year old face look so appalled.
“No,” she said, speaking very clearly so as to never be so grossly misunderstood again, “they’re going to eat the passengers.”
God I hope she lets me read it.
Funny story from the other night:
A dad came into my cafe with his 3 year old daughter. He bought her a cookie and himself a coffee. They sit down, and I go back to my pre-closing cleaning. Three minutes later the dad walks up to the counter again, so I stop cleaning and walk over to greet him again.
As I’m in the middle of saying “hi” he cuts me off and says “Water.”
Not “Can I get a glass of water, please?” not “Where can I get water?” not even a confused “water?” like he’s not sure how to get water in this cafe. Just a single word demand.
I work in silicon valley, so I’m kind of used to techies talking to me like I’m Siri or Alexa, but it still always drives me crazy when they do this. Like, I don’t even care about the “please” anymore, I just want people to talk to me in complete sentences. So I get the guy a cup of water, and he sits back down.
As I’m about to go back to cleaning I hear his daughter go “Daddy, you did that WRONG. You have to say ’CAN I have a glass of water PLEASE’”
My jaw hit the ground. The dad suddenly became flustered and tried coming up with excuses “I-I said please…” “No you didn’t!” “Well she was busy…. I didn’t want to bother her…..” “You still got to be polite!”
When they were done eating the dad brought the dishes back to the counter and said “Thank you so much!” It’s amazing how fast someone’s manners can improve when a 3 year old calls them out.
Shout out to whoever is teaching that little girl manners, because you know it’s not her dad. I hope she never stops calling rude people out.
So, I moved recently. And my new neighborhood is full of kids. I met about 20 of them the day I moved in because they helped me chase down my dog when he got loose and I can already tell you, me and these kids are gonna be besties. They come over to play with my dogs at least once a day. A few little convos we’ve had so far:
(On the day we met)
6yo: My name Kendrick but you can call me KJ cause my friends call me KJ and you my friend now.
~
KJ: I’ll walk your dogs for 5$!
Me: Imma think about it, okay?
KJ: Ok ok, 3$!! But that’s the lowest imma go. What a deal right?!?!
~
9yo: You know my Mama’s got a boyfriend.
Me: That’s nice!
9yo: My grandmama don’t like him cause he ain’t got a job.
Me: Oh.
9yo: Do you got a job?
Me: Yeah.
9yo: *screaming across the yard* GRANDMAMA!! THIS GIRL GOT A JOB!
(I might be her new stepmom, y’all. Idk)
~
12 yo: You ain’t got a man?
Me: Nope.
12 yo: You got a woman?
Me: Nope.
12 yo: It’s just you and these dogs?
Me: Yep.
12 yo: Girllllll! You living the life!
~
9yo: *banging on my back door* HEY!! Open the door!!
Me: *opening the door, freaking out* OMG! WHATS WRONG!
9yo: Nothing. You got a popsicle?
Me: Ummmm...no.
9yo: You want one?
Me:???
9yo: *pulls a popsicle from behind her back* I think you need this.
Me: Thank you.
9yo: Alright. Imma see you tomorrow. Bye!!
Me:...okay
Protect these kids at all costs
6 year old fan asks Sebastian a question.
THIS POST
THIS FUCKING POST
I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR MONTHS
