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#body – @thesunflowersqueen on Tumblr
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Ramblings from Apalapachia...

@thesunflowersqueen / thesunflowersqueen.tumblr.com

Helen Sunflower. 34. Enby/Demisexual/Queer. They/Them. Feminist. British-Canadian. Traveller. English Language Teacher. Artist. Reader. Writer. Dramatist. Whovian. Sci-fi & fantasy lover. Talks too much. Wants more than ordinary. Willing to fight for it. Sometimes NSFW.
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bloodytales

Teach boys about periods

My mother also talked about periods to my brothers.

When I first got mine I had terrible cramps. Crippling cramps. I once was camping with my family and a few of my big brother’s friends when my period came. My cramps were so bad that my mom gave me a full pain killer ( I was 13 and before that she only gave me pills cut in half).

I literally laid down on my parents’ air mattress and cried in pain for an hour before the pill kicked in.

My brothers friend came in to the big tent and I was just curled up and sobbing. Now, I was quite the tomboy and was known to rough house with my brothers and their friends and made sure I wasnt seen as just “a little girl.” So my brother’s friend was confused to see me openly weeping in the fetal position (seriously, these were the worst cramps I have had in my life. My vision went white). He asked what was wrong with me.

My big brother stood up immediately and suggested a nice long hike. During this hike I am sure he had a pretty awkward conversation with his friend explaining menstrual cramps, because when they got back the pain pill had (mostly) kicked in and I was sitting up at a table when my brother’s friend sheepishly asked me if I was feeling better. I said I was better, and he said good.

When we made s'mores that night my brother and his friend kept me well supplied with chocolate.

Making sure sons know as much about periods and menstruation as daughters makes them better brothers, better sons better fathers, and better men. A man that understands a period will not lightly accuse a woman of “being on her period” if the woman is in an argument.

Raise better sons Teach them about normal bodily functions.

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last week i saw some article on buzzfeed or or the cut or wherever describing the new phrase “body-neutrality” by which they mean roughly the same thing that i call “weaponized ugliness” or my other tag “existing as revolutionary praxis”. body positivity is well-meaning but not for everyone and sometimes harmful.

i have a body, it has a certain shape and function, it has certain colors and marks and scars and curves and angles and sexy parts and unsexy parts.  i don’t need to love it and i don’t have to hate it.  i’m allowed to just have it be there, a tool for my use and an essential part of my humanity.  i can be ugly or pretty, that’s irrelevant to my right to decent medical care and clothes that fit and respect from strangers.  i can be any shape or size or color or gender and still deserve those rights.

telling me to love my body is still policing my energy and my thoughts and my spending habits and my self respect.  instead tell me i’m allowed to feel however i want about my body. give me bodily autonomy.  body neutrality means let me decide what i need or want to do with the skin i’m in.

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