I’m going to say something that may seem a little “gross” if you’ve never experienced depression, executive dysfunction, or disability. But this post isn’t for you.
This is for everybody who has watched their plates grow mold in the sink. Had no energy to even look at what’s in the back of the fridge. Had clothes get mildewey from sitting so long. Closed whole rooms because it’s the sight of how messy it is makes you feel worse. Can’t remember their last shower. Just can’t summon the motivation to begin, because how can it ever end?
I see you. I see your struggle. You’re still a valid and valuable human being, and your difficulty caring for yourself is not a moral failing. You are not an evil person because of a struggle partially outside your control. I hope that you get help in the forms you need it, and can feel at peace in your space again.