the-asexuality-blog reblogged
"we need more weird gays" you can't handle aces & aros. you can't handle queer-platonic relationships. you can't handle it/its users. you can't handle neopronouns and xenogenders. you can't handle polyamory.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
“For many years in Poland shameful words have been directed at numerous individuals simply because they chose to decide for themselves who they are and whom they love,” TVP host Wojciech Szeląg said on a Sunday night broadcast, as translated by The Independent. “LGBT+ people are not an ideology but people, with specific names, faces, relatives, and friends.”
“All these people should hear the words ‘I am sorry’ exactly from this place,” added Szeląg, who was hosting two LGBTQ+ activists, Bart Staszewski and Maja Heban. “I am sorry.”
Poland has recently had a change in government, with the far-right, anti-LGBTQ+ Law and Justice party losing its majority in Parliament. There is now a governing coalition of liberal and centrist parties, and Donald Tusk, a moderate, has succeeded Mateusz Morawiecki as prime minister. Conservative Andrzej Duda remains president, but the president has less power than the prime minister.
Szeląg’s words were a repudiation of something Duda once said — that the LGBTQ+ movement was not people but an ideology. Under the Law and Justice government, many Polish leaders claimed LGBTQ+ people were a threat to the so-called traditional family, and some cities established what they dubbed “LGBT-free zones.”
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
adamantine-system-deactivated20
someone should coin white queer liberation as a similar term to white feminism
adamantine-system
like I need white queers to understand that their lack of interest in supporting queers of color isn’t a harmless thing that happens on an individual scale. It’s a pattern and phenomenon that leaves a huge number of queer people feeling isolated from their own community.
If your queer activism doesn’t include queer people of color, you’re the problem.
If you tell qpoc to stop complaining about the lack of queer characters of color because white queer rep should be enough for us, you’re the problem.
If you don’t know anything about qpoc outside of That One Activist and only value qpoc because “we gave you your rights,” you’re the problem.
If you don’t care about queer people in countries where queerness is still illegal, you’re the problem.
If your queer friend group only includes white people, you’re the problem.
If your idea of what queerness looks like only accommodates whiteness and white beauty standards, you’re the problem.
If you don’t understand how your race has contributed to centuries of harm for qpoc, or how queers like you openly and systematically exclude us from our own community in the past and present, you’re the problem.
If you throw a fit when qpoc tell you you’re not the most oppressed person in the room, you’re the problem.
If you hide behind your queerness to excuse your racism, you’re the problem.
If you can’t accept other cultures’ gender structures without trying to fit it into the Eurocentric binary, you’re the problem.
Learning about qpoc and our experiences isn’t a fun extracurricular you can do if you feel like it. It’s a core class if you truly care about queer unity and liberation.
(qpoc can add on. white people can rb without comment. do not tag as q slur.)
adamantine-system
so I have a few popular posts on this topic that have circulated quite a bit in far left spaces. Here are some tags to support my statement that this is widespread and a problem everywhere, not just in less progressive areas
here’s what qpoc are saying
ID: 12 different sets of tags. Set 1 reads “seeing yt queers be so vocal on what queerness is like is what’s the most alienating for me and other black queer youth.” Set 2 reads “OMG this exactly… I can’t even express the frustration” in all caps. Set 3 reads “all of this. white queers are so exhausting. we’re nothing but tokens to you lot. y’all talk about diversity and deface the rainbow to remind yourselves that we exist, and yet there is no difference in your incuriosity about our lives and willingness to grant us space and voice. race to y’all is something tacked on top of our queerness rather than the thing that shapes and defines it.” Set 4 reads “no they don’t know anything abt us. they created segregation and violently maintained it even in the gay community.” Set 5 reads “it’s so hard being black and queer. white queer people are so fucking antiblack that it’s actually mind-boggling.” Set 6 reads “i feel so uncomfortable in physical queer spaces a lot of the time because the only people who show up are white.” Set 7 reads “people rarely think of blk queers if they can help it.” Set 8 reads “my Blackness is a huge part of both my gender and sexuality. YES. and SO sick of the gentrification of our language. they know absolutely nothing.” Set 9 reads “the answer is no*. most of them don’t care. i tried to explain it to a white [person] before and they abruptly stopped me and tried to tell me i was wrong? hmmm.” Set 10 reads “in my real day to day life i don’t hang out with white queers for so many fuckin reasons.” Set 11 reads “This This This. in all caps. The lgbtq community is sooo antiblack it’s unreal. it’s part of the reason why i do identify as queer (even though that’s a struggle too). i’m just. so glad more and more posts about the racism within the community and within certain groups of the community is being expressed on here because a lot of them really need a reality check on their racism even though they think being gay means they can’t be racist.” Set 12 reads “they memorize one or two names n wash their hands. this nailed what i find so frustrating being in lgbt groups now. yes you can parrot a slogan what else.” end ID.
*context for this is that the post asked the question “Do they know x” multiple times. number 3 in the links list
and here’s what white queers are saying
ID: 11 sets of tags from different people. Set 1 reads “I actually didn’t know this before!! important.” Set 2 reads “ohh okay i actually did not know this. makes more sense though i guess.” Set 3 reads “huh i didn’t know this.” Set 4 reads “actually didn’t know abt this.” Set 5 reads “oh i never knew this. always thought it was just a right wing term. but no. it’s another thing they stole. great information to know.” Set 6 reads “didn’t know this.” Set 7 reads “interesting. I did not know this.” Set 8 reads “oh i didn’t know this! I genuinely thought this was something the far right made up.” Set 9 reads “oh neat. i didn’t know about the history of it.” Set 10 reads “i didn’t know about the majority of these issues.” Set 11 reads “recognized zero of the people listed in this post.” end ID.
y’all need to do better.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
The way that exclusionists treat ace and aro people often reminds me of how the average person would treat me when I started being open as non-binary. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it a thousand times, we are not enemies. Our experiences do not oppose each other, they are intertwined. If you’re ace, if you’re aromantic, if you’re any variation thereupon; your home is here. You belong here, too. You are beautiful, and powerful; and you don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. You are a valued part of this community.
i’m crying
Aces are family in the community. It’d be wise not to forget that.
Aros are also family. That's important too.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
this korean butch lady is so cool she legally changed her name to lesvos, a variation of lesbos the birthplace of sappho. which is also the name of her lesbian bar, the first one ever established in south korea in 1996.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
god i am always the FIRST to rally against the failures of just fighting for tolerance from straight cis ppl, but also we haven't even fucking reached tolerance yet.
we still need "We're Queer We're Here Get Used To It", because i don't know about you guys, but from what I'm seeing, they aren't fucking used to it.
we need that old school "we're your hairdressers, your teachers, your neighbors, your siblings, your friends" energy back ASAP. quietly queer isn't cutting it for me anymore. in your face dykes fag queer trans forever until i'm fucking dead.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
imo if you’re going to call yourself queer and seek out queer community, you need to let go of the idea that the way people identify, present, and choose to interact with other queer people can be labeled and explained. queerness is about saying “fuck societal norms” and sometimes those societal norms include what you think lesbians, gay men, trans people, women, etc. look like, act like, sleep with, etc. queerness is in direct opposition to hard lines and strict definitions. if you are uncomfortable with that, you’re probably not ready to fully immerse in the queer community. get used to being confused and freaked out. that’s the point. celebrate it.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
Anonymous asked:
Hey miaro, a few days back, there was this small discussion around queer and mentioned the different spectrums within it, I'm actually like I want to educate myself with the identities and what's happening around, can you suggest some books and blogs or people or any reference, any YouTube channels or tumblr blogs anything...
Sure !
@genderkoolaid make a lot of posts surrounding gender, it might be a bit harder to understand fo beginners, but once you got the basics you will understand queerness a lot deeper thanks to em !
@vaspider has some queer tags with very interesting things,especially queer history, and butchness as well as many many many clever additions.
There are two Youtubers named Ash and Gray who did entire series in the past about queer and LGBTQ terms and i tihnk at least two solely dedicated to Aro and Ace spectrums and QPRs !They also discuss BDSM and thr kink community, because they are our siblings !
Thomas Sanders i think has some old videos about the community as well !
MacDoesIt is gay and funny as hell, makes reaction videos mostly
QueerKiwi as well makes react videos that can br informative as well!
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
Please if you have the means consider donating to the following:
- Queer Svit - https://queersvit.taplink.ws/ helping LGBTQ+ and BIPOC аffected by the war and political repressions
- Center-T - https://centre-t.com/english helping transgender people in Russia
- КилькоТ-Действие - https://boosty.to/kilkota
- Delo LGBT+ - https://www.delo.lgbt/ || https://boosty.to/delolgbt
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
the point of my masculinity and male positivity posts are to underline that masculinity and manhood are seen as a threat or in direct opposition to queerness, and that often times in order to be seen as queer you have to be partially or wholly feminine or gender neutral, or express your manhood in a feminine or gender neutral way in order to no longer be threatening, invasive, or a problem.
it is very difficult to exist in queer spaces as a hyper masculine person & a man. you're made to feel like you need to walk a tight rope feeling like you're inherently out of place, as if you existing and being masculine or a man in queer spaces makes others uncomfortable inherently.. just know that when i make positivity posts it is to remind us all that masculinity/manhood and queerness are not opposites and that you do not have to be a feminine man or masc person to be viewed/seen/heard as queer.
chasing men, masculine people, and masculinity out of queer spaces isn't helping anyone currently and won't help anyone down the line. please accept masc enbies, butches, bears, and masculine trans men with the same kindness, love, and passion that you do neutral and feminine people. that's the point when i make these kinds of posts. thank u
This is 100% thanks to the “No kink at Pride” people. Because?
They didn’t want these men at Pride. This is a leather daddy. (A rather covered-up leather daddy, because this addition doesn’t do anyone any good if it’s flagged into invisibility, but best believe that dude has hella abs under there, and a 50/50 chance of heavy tattooing.)
Here’s another. Again on the modest side for the sake of not triggering the automod thing, but you can see the interplay of queerness and masculinity—particularly a kind of forward, unashamed sexual explicitness, if you take a look at their crotches. That’s a kind of…for lack of a better term, mating display. “I have this and want to use it, or at least know there are men here fantasizing about me using it.” It’s akin to a woman wearing a plunge neck. You’re supposed to look, and if you’re a dude, he’d like you to like it.
These dudes (well, most of these dudes)? They’re bears. (I said “most” because the guy in the sunhat is technically a cub. He’s too young to be a bear.) The furriness and the beards and the age and the bellies ARE THE POINT. The name “bear” is an affectionate one. Literally “I’m big and hairy!” In the 00s there was a stereotype(?) that bears were also super-cuddly. I don’t know how true it is, but I can confirm every bear I’ve ever met gives amazing hugs. They will readjust your spine, your touch starvation, and your entire outlook on life.
None of this touches on the rather large queer kink communities around “men in uniform.” Military, police, construction, I can’t tell you how many strip nights I’ve been to at a local gay bar with a guy dressed as a sexy firefighter getting absolutely swamped with dollar bills and lap dance requests.
You aren’t seeing these men because they’ve been forced out of spaces THEY CREATED. One of the best things you can do is to help bring them back.
They’re not threatening, they’re not disgusting, they’re not somehow dangerous just by virtue of being open about their sexuality and sexual desire. They’re just human beings who human slightly differently than you.
But more importantly?
They’re family. And don’t you forget it.
Leather daddies, imho, are fucking around with hypergender performance as much as drag queens. It's two sides of the same coin. Leather daddies literally have beauty pageants.
Also, there's a solid 50% chance that when you talk to those masc-looking leather daddies and bears are just much femme sissies as more femme presenting gay men.
Sincerely, a genderqueer amab bear who dresses like a dad half the time
Your local leather historian here to add a little bit of context to the "this is the fault of the no kink at pride" thing.
The leather community has existed formally (in the United States) since the mid 50s. The Satyr Motorcycle Club was founded in San Francisco in 1954, it is still around today making it the oldest continously run gay organization in the country. This is 15 years before Stonewall. The first gay leather bar, the gold coast, opened in 1958 in Chicago. 11 years before Stonewall. Informally the leather community has existed since the end of wwii when men who had spent years wearing leather, riding motorcycles, and having gay sex came back home and kept doing those things.
Gay men have been arguing about whether or not the leather community belongs at pride since 1970. Since the inception of pride, or more accurately, "Gay Freedom Day." Because the leather community has heavt ties to the SM community. (Whether or not the Leather community is a sub community in the larger SM community, or there's just a lot of overlap is a conversation leathermen have always been having) but there has always been push back because of the tie to radical sex and because of accusations that leathermen are trying to "act straight"
In an essay in Leatherfolk: Radical Sex, People, Politics, and Practice Leatherman Michale Bronski recalls hearing a lesbian tell a gay man "“Give me a break. You think that someone wearing chaps, a black leather jacket, a motorcycle cap, handcuffs on his belt, two different color hankies, and 36 inch high black boots looks Straight!”*
Which brings us to their presentation of masculinity. If you'll excuse me for becoming An Academic(tm) for a moment, if you look at these communities, Leathermen and Bears, what you find is that popular theories of masculinitu don't work when describing these men, at least not when they're in the spaces that the audence that their gender performance is for also exist. Queer masculinity is a performance for queer people, framing it in the lense of heterosexuality does not do anyone any good and erases the nuances of what is happening.
The leather communities are some of the oldest queer communities in America. To push them out of the queer community or suggest that they're toxic, or somehow harming the community as a whole is to ignore history completely, and engage with an argument that's half a century old.
In 1982 leathermen founded AIDS Emergency Fund in San Francisco. Consistently through the first decade of the AIDS Crisis leathermen (and other radical sex communities) were promoting safer sex, and hosting all kinds of fundraisers to raise money for PWAs and reseach (a lot of leather beauty pagents popped up just for the purpose of rasing money.) All this while they were being told BY OTHER GAY MEN they were the ones killing everyone, they and their weird gross sex were the problem (never mind that a lot of what the leathermen were doing was already safer than monogamous anal sex)
Leathermen are your family, we're part of your community and have every right to be here, even if you don't understand our masculinity.
❤️🖤💙🤍💙🖤
*none of this even begins touching the surface of the discourse leather lesbians and feminists have been having since the 70s. It's tied to TERF rhetoric and the anti-porn movement.
Historic note on bears: the origin of the community is shouded in myth, but certainly by the late 70s the beginnings of the community were there. The AIDS Crisis shot the community to popularity. Because AIDS will cause incredible weight loss, the eorticization of fat bodies was the eroticiaztion of safe bodies. If you read porn written by bears in the 80s and early 90s you'll notice the use of condoms where in other erotica that is lacking.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
I’m all for going about queerness with the goal of not being able to be understood by outsiders but like. you’ve GOT to be normal about aro & ace people if you do. you can’t go on about being confusing to cishets for fun and then complain about ace & aro people who go about sex and romance and attraction in ways that don’t make sense to you.
supporting queerness that confuses others should include queerness that confuses YOU too even if you’re queer yourself.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
To any transgender person that is worried for their life, there is hope!
These are pictures from a Trans Rights rally at Purdue University at Lafayette today. HUNDREDS of students showed up and people not even going to Purdue showed up.
Citizens from Lafayette and beyond, students from all parts of the world, and even PASTORS from local churches came out to show their support for trans people and the LGBT+ community as a whole
If people are willing to come out and support trans people they don’t even know, image what they would do for people they DO know. You matter, you specifically, you are loved, and don’t you dare forget it, because you are worth it, these people all care about you enough to fight for you.
Like and reblog and do whatever else the algorithm needs you to do because we need to give as many trans teens hope as possible. the current wave of legislation is so depressing, I can only hope that I reach at least one person. If you want to message me, I am open talk at any time. I already know I would love to meet you! 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
Pride history posts on here seem almost exclusively to revolve around Stonewall which can leave the impression that America is the only place where anything important ever happened and obviously is not true so I have compiled a few links where you can learn about LGBTQ history in other countries! Feel free to add
In the spirit of acknowledging places and moments in queer or LGBTQIA+ history - and specifically because I'm a Bay Area native - I'd also like to note that the Compton's Cafeteria riot happened in San Francisco in 1966.
If you watch the 2019 'Tales of the City' miniseries then you saw a reenactment of it.
It's almost folklore, however - even with the people who were there still alive, or at least they were a few years ago - because "the police records of the riot no longer exist and the newspapers didn’t cover the incidents at all."
That means that it officially never happened, kinda.
The revolution will not be televised and the riot will not be published.
That's why it's always important to document, to photograph, to record, to share. People have to count on themselves; it has been proven over and over again that we can't rely on institutions to care or be accurate.
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
happy pride ! to the faggots and freaks, the trannies, the boygirls and girlboys and the he/him butches and she/her twinks ! to the gendervague and the genderfucked !! to every trans and nonbinary person at whatever stage they're at !! and to the eggs and the questioning ! to my bisexuals and pansexuals and omnisexuals and polysexuals and the lesbians w/ boyfriends and gays w/ girlfriends !! happy pride to the queers who wear battle jackets and the queers who stealth and every single one of you in between !! happy pride to my aces and aros !! happy pride all you funky sexual deviants and kinksters !! to my elders who faced decades of bigotry and lost many a loved one, and the youngsters learning our history and experiencing it themselves !
I love you all so so much I love us and who we are and I ask you: be kind to each other
the-asexuality-blog reblogged
all this fucking talk of "stealing" with the queer community. "gays are stealing from lesbians" "aces are stealing from gays" "transes are stealing from everyone" absolutely convinced white queers learned about cultural appropriation and decided it could be applied to sexuality and gender and it became entrenched becuz ppl are fucking obsessed with gatekeeping and exclusionism
besties, we are all in the alphabet soup together. the lines between us are blurred as hell. we are not stealing, we are inspired. our culture is bright and beautiful and a street fair that everyone trades at. quit being so goddamn individualistic and embrace the community. it's the only way we have solidarity