Mixing Memory and Desire

which lucky lady gets to be subjected to me behaving like this 24/7 🧍🏻‍♂️

I'm literally this dad

I love these videos they're all having so much fun

omg this was hilarious 💀

the editing ✨ the acting ✨ the tension build-up ✨ the line delivery ✨ 100/10 video

You all are the coolest people I vaguely know

dear people with OCD: the next time you have spiraling & intrusive thoughts, what-ifs, or catastrophizing scenarios, I am sending a cardigan-wearing 46-year old NYU professor directly into your brain and he says "Aaaaand scene!!!" and he claps his hands slowly. and he says "Wow. Wow. Powerful stuff. Evocative imagery. A little bit post-modern, a little bit hysterical realism in the vein of Don Delilo but let's pause right here." and you will recognize your thoughts as a perplexing avant-garde film shown to an audience of 15 liberal arts students who are now trying to get a good grade and sleep with their professor.

I almost posted this without the professor-fucking part but I decided that it is in fact crucial to combating OCD. sometimes you have to fight fire with fire i.e. spiraling thoughts with strong negative emotions get countered with strongly emotive surprise, cringe, and humor

sometimes the OCD brain can't just be stopped from fantasizing completely, but you can redirect that anxious mental energy toward crafting a fictional setup and story that doesn't involve you or your fears at all

another thing I do is interrupt intrusive thoughts with a very conscious and deliberate "and then an elephant walks in." and I'd make myself commit to the bit. it would force me to reframe everything and specifically understand it in an absurdist context, make me confront how ridiculous the initial thoughts even were, and there is honestly no way to keep being serious and distraught about your what-if scenarios when you've introduced a fucking elephant into the mix. film studies professor is also that elephant.

so it goes from scary thoughts about my life -> step back. this is a weird fictional film now. -> characters are analyzing the film -> those characters are super messy and have their own problems, and I'm watching them now and eating popcorn at this soap opera

I need you to understand that now I am seeing this whole scenario but the professor is an elephant. Exactly as described, an elephant wearing a cardigan and no I do not understand how it is managing the clapping noise with legs that bend the way an elephant’s do. And yes the students all still want to sleep with him

A+ ADDITION

every time i write i think about that maya angelou quote where she talks about her editor asking her why she uses semicolons instead of colons and says she has often responded by threatening to never speak to him again

she’s so fucking funny

Patrick Stewart's very own on-set AU

Spooky season is closer than you think.

Are you frustrated you can't leave second kudos on AO3? or third kudos? or whatever-who's-counting kudos?

Well, have I got the html for you!

Plop any of these in a comment (by copy&pasting the code) to make an author's day and show your appreciation!

It will look something like this (and will be transparent with white outline on dark backgrounds):

Feel free to spread and use these as much as you like! (and if you have ideas for other variations, let me know ✌️)

So happy to see people enjoying these and spreading the love 💖

UPDATE with some suggestions from the replies! And bonus: cookie kudos.

HTML codes under the cut.

Love this!

There's also a rekudos converter tool by @honestlyvan if you're interested in that!

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

what if the turian fringe was a bit more expressive? 🧐 drew some examples based on our favourite boi

Lmaoo

It's disrespectful

This is SPECTACULARLY done

I feel called out

We know that Facebook is brainscorching your parents and tiktok is brainscorching your cousins, but some of you refuse to admit that you got your brain scorched here. However unlike those sites there isn’t an algorithm here you just make bad choices.

That’s all we ever wanted. To arrive at Hell as a result of our own dubious navigation skills instead of as the result of Satan owning all the road sign companies.

I wasn’t expecting much. Maybe Vader’s baritone with hints of melody. I was *not* expecting it to be a masterpiece, what the fuck, this is a million times better than I was expecting and it’s unironically really good. Turn on that volume button.

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

@victoriansecret I found your friend!!!