(via umblrgumblr)

This post hurts

(via witch-with-a-dick)

(via naidje)

i have this month’s glamour. THEY REALLY THINK GEAR SHIFTS ARE A MENORAH

I’M SCREAMING

wat D:

part of me refused to believe that a mainstream magazine could really misidentify gear shifts cuff links as menorah cuff links and advertise them as an appropriate hanukkah gift, but no, the goyim have gone and done it. 

SPACE TREKS THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE STARPRISE ENTERSHIP

Long Live and Prosperous

Space, the fronty finalier;

These are the voyages of the starprise Entership;

It’s five-mission year to sort out new light and new symbolizations

To badly go whence none men has before gone!

** Star Trek theme starts playing off-key and performed by a kazoo band**

I just dies.

Here Are Some People Who Are Very Confused About What “No Makeup” Looks Like

Woman: wearing foundation, powder, blush, bronzer, highlight, false lashes, mascara, nude lipstick, brow powder eyeshadow

Man: she doesn’t have red lipstick on so that means no makeup

like 3 of them are wearing very visible winged eyeliner i’m screaming

the cursed child plot is the worst thing ive read in my entire life please read it i’m losing my mind

Okay people, history-fail story-time...

So back in the 1780′s when our country was still figuring crap out and ol’ George Washington was just elected president, G.W. decided to send a letter to Congress along the lines of ‘Looking forward to working with you all, this will be exciting!” Congress, not wanting to slight the president and also trying to express their own enthusiasm, sent back a letter along the lines of “Glad you’re excited, we are also looking forward to working with you!”

Then George sends another letter back saying something like “Cool cool bros, glad you’re just as excited as I am,” and Congress, again not wanting to be awkward or just ignore the PRESIDENT, sent back ANOTHER letter saying some dumb crap that was probably along the lines of “Glad you’re excited that we’re excited that you’re excited.”

Democracy at its finest.

And while this in itself is funny, that is not even the best part.

George Washington, while being powerful, was not extremely eloquent, and at this point was also aging, busy, and overall very stressed about his new position (which he did not want in the first place).  So he asked his old friend James Madison, who had a much better way with words, to write the first note to Congress.  Good old James Madison, wanting to oblige his friend, did just that and composed the note to Congress.  Now, J-Mads was himself a member of Congress, so when the note arrived, he was in session to hear “Washington’s” letter read.

Congress got nervous and worried about who could possibly compose a formal and acceptable letter back to Washington.  Who better than his old friend, James Madison?  So Jimmy, being obliging, wrote the response.  When Washington received the reply, he once again asked his friend to write the response.  

And who did Congress choose to write their final letter? That’s right….none other than Jimmy-James-Madison himself.

So James Madison, future 4th president of the United States, wrote himself 4 letters under the guise of George Washington and the first Congress of the U.S.  And he was too embarrassed to admit it.

catfish of the millenium

I was scrolling through my dash on mobile and I saw this drawing by Rob Liefeld and I was like

“Hey this doesn’t look too bad.”

“oh”

“oh god.”

“she’s like fucking long cat”

“enough”

Make-up at Rodarte Fall 2014

how can you take this post seriously with the photos arranged like that

~*~moisturize meeeeee**~*~**~~

Unfortunate sign at pride. “A positive place until there’s a cure” (then it’s negative)

“british sense of humor” isnt a thing yall just arent funny lmfaooooo

Lol Americans

Americans have literally no banter

why did u colonize 90% of the world

lol idk Just seemed less barbaric than slaughtering millions of native americans, robbing their land, claiming it as my own and buying human beings from across the Atlantic to build my country :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)))))))))))))

idk how to tell u this but…..ur people did that

finish him

Brand New Congress: 535 progressive candidates, 1 ticket

Some of the technology activists who were key to the Dean, Obama and Sanders campaign have a new, audacious program: they’re going to run 535 bipartisan candidates for office in the 2016 election, backed by a single website for fundraising, grassroots organizing and messages, based on Bernie Sanders’ political platform.

A recurring criticism of Sanders’ platform is that without a Congress and state-level governments to support him, President Sanders would just be one voice (albeit a powerful one). This hasn’t escaped the attention of activists who worked on the campaign. With Brand New Congress, progressives will have the chance to work together, across the country, in solidarity, to replace the incumbents who owe their jobs to the rich and powerful with new entrants who owe their jobs to the people and have sworn to fight for “a unified economic, social justice, and climate change platform.”

http://boingboing.net/2016/04/26/brand-new-congress-535-progre.html

… replace all of congress with 535 somehow bipartisan candidates who all believe in Bernie’s platform, through an effort currently organized by 37 Bernie staff and volunteers, some of whom, I guess, are technology activists?

“Get ready for the most beautiful campaign ever” it says. I believe them, of course, because they have a very nice minimalist website. Look at those clean lines. I just can’t wait for my government to be disrupted by a single, simple website, folks! Finally, the revolution is upon us, and, yes, as we all knew it would be, it has abundant, fashionable, whitespace!

I mean, by all means get your dander up, but perhaps a proposal of such… breathtakingly audacious scope… should have a little bit more behind it than a vertical scroll down to some social media links?

oh my god

“don’t like the Congress you have? just get a new one!”

imagine if cis people had to follow extreme gender roles to be “passing”

Imagine if people stopped blaming their low grades on literally everything other than their stupidity and lack of motivation to study. If you’re staying up to 4am every morning reading Supernatural SamxDeanxCastielxLuciferxTheCatInTheSecondEpisode fanfics, your gender proooobably has nothing to do with your grades.

This is sooo embarrassing and is a very good example on why you should keep your mouth shut instead of attempting to join conversations you know nothing about

I can’t stop laughing because…

like I don’t know how you can get more obvious than tweeting “I’m sure I’m bisexual,” but clearly The Sun isn’t convinced

and then the caption “marnie simpson ‘thinks’ she ‘might’ be bisexual” jfc