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#ladymurgatroid – @tangleofrainbows on Tumblr
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tangle of rainbows

@tangleofrainbows / tangleofrainbows.tumblr.com

just an enby in new york . . . agender, 29, it/itself
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@sigmastolen replied to your post: “in news that is Utterly Shocking, it appears that the australian...”

ughhhhhhhhh what a pain, good luck & stay strong <3

@shippyard replied to your post: “in news that is Utterly Shocking, it appears that the australian...”

best of luck getting the australian government to do your bidding! <3

thanks friends <3 it seems like it’s gonna be ok, it’s just been frustrating to hash out with the administration b/c of the time difference and the inability to call. plus also now i have the Added Social Anxiety of having to go to my doctor in california and be like “ok so i know i already asked you for a thing about this but now i need you to fill out this totally different form which seems like it’s asking you to say i’ve had hormones+surgery but really i promise it isn’t i even have it in writing from the pertinent state government also you need to get it notarized” so that’s fun -________-

@ladymurgatroid replied to your post: “in news that is Utterly Shocking, it appears that the australian...”

maybe they are talking about haircuts?? practically every queer person I know has gotten a rad haircut around the time they start being in charge of their own gender expression.

omg so my gay and lesbian lit teacher in high school had this Theory that whenever someone made a big life change (esp a big life change around gender/sexuality), they would get a Dramatic Haircut and i was so resistant to this theory at the time b/c i was insistent that i could make big internal changes w/o making big external changes AND YET here i am newly out with a bright purple pixie cut and i feel like ms barber-just is Newly Vindicated

#whoops#my conversations#that which we call a brin by any other name would be an error#the perils of social interaction#the great life change hair change equivalence#about me#gpoy#ladymurgatroid#sigmastolen#shippyard
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kritischetheologie
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phoukanamedpookie

Things I’ve always wondered

  1. A gentile vampire turns a promising Torah scholar into a vampire. Is the scholar still permitted to study Torah? Are they still under the yoke of the mitzvot? How does vampirism impact observant Jewish practice? Are they still Jewish, or are they apostates? Would it be permissible for the scholar to turn other people into vampires to cure them of terminal illnesses?
  2. To what degree are Jewish werewolves morally responsible for their actions while under the influence of the full moon? What must they do if they eat treyf in their wolf form?
  3. If, for some reason, we must leave earth for another inhabitable planet on the other side of the galaxy, what do we do about holidays and observing Shabbat? Would we go by earth time or local time? What if this planet has no moon or more than one moon? How would we face Jerusalem to pray?
  4. Can aliens convert to Judaism? If so, does it only apply to humanoid aliens like the greys, or would reptilian aliens and ilithids be able to convert too?
  5. Can sentient machines like the Terminator convert to Judaism? What about Agents from The Matrix?
  6. Speaking of The Matrix, are we still obligated to obey the mitzvot even if we are literally brains in jars or living in a simulated reality created by computer programs? What happens if we’re freed and whatever basis for our Jewish identity we had is no longer present or certain. Are we still Jews? Do we still have a covenant?

speaking with my minimal scholarly experience but also opening this up for all jews to contribute:

1. i don’t see any reason why such a promising torah scholar shouldn’t be allowed to continue to study torah, but practicing judaism would be difficult: blood of all animals is probably treyf, and blood of humans is definitely treyf, so a jewish vampire would have to break mitzvot on a nearly constant basis to survive. however under pikuach nefesh i feel like were the vampire literally about to die, they could consume human or animal blood. therefore a jewish vampire would have to live in a state of starvation at all times, which would probably have a fascinating impact on his torah study.

2. a shoteh is not held responsible for their actions by human or divine courts. maimonides defines a shoteh as any mentally unstable person - for our purposes, a jewish werewolf in wolf form can probably be seen as under the influence of mental instability, and is not responsible for their actions under the law.

3. this is fascinating because when we face jerusalem in america, we face east - even though, physically speaking, jerusalem is somewhere under us, on the other side of the globe. for this reason i’m inclined to avoid the obvious answer, “face earth”. perhaps it would be possible to face, in general, the stars? going by “earth time” seems logistically impossible, since earth has 24 separate times. i think this will be a separate issue for every planet.

4. we are already a reptilian alien race, this question is moot.

5. if robots cannot convert to judaism i am quitting. more seriously: this seems like a good place for the analogy of the four children: the simple robot asks, “what is all this”, i.e., judaism, and you download information about it into his database; the wicked robot asks, “what does all this mean to you,” i.e., humans, and you reply, “we are doing a human thing; if you were a human, you would not be part of it, either”; the wise robot asks, “can you please explain the laws and customs of judaism to me, fellow sentients” and you do so and allow him to convert if he wishes it; and the robot who does not know enough to ask a question does not pass the turing test, so the point is moot.

6. oh yeah, we’d totally still be jews! it’s like finding out for sure there’s no god - maybe it’s gonna stop some people from practicing judaism, but not most of us.

#amazing#beautiful#judaism#science fiction#attn#ladymurgatroid#what a time to be alive#blood#vampires#werewolves#aliens#hiss hiss motherfuckers
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tintinnabulation-of-the-bells
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as-seenon-tv

I love working at joann fabrics today a guy asked me to show him the fake fur and when I did he goes “noooo… this won’t do” and part of my job is giving advice for projects so I asked him what he was using it for and he looks down at the floor and quietly says “… I wanna make a yeti costume to scare people with when we go skiing…”

#omg#incredible#an inspiration to us all#pranks#yeti#costumes#fur#when sad#attn#ladymurgatroid
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sxeli answered your question: “also i just realized! while i was out and about this afternoon, i hit...”

🎊🎆🎇🎊🎆🎊🎊

so going by the tiny versions of these that are showing up on my computer screen, i can only assume that you think i should rain glitter and fire down on the populace as a majestic apparition in the night and while i must say this is hugely tempting and an excellent suggestion my glitter rain privileges are currently suspended after The Incident With The Frogs so i will sadly not be able to carry it out :(

#sxeli#glitter#destruction from on high#randomness#silliness#attn#ladymurgatroid#can neither confirm nor deny#being partly responsible for what went down in your dryer today
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ok internet, i need your help: because REASONS i am looking for a yarmulke with pusheen on it, or, failing that, a solid yarmulke crochet pattern and some guidance abt how to create custom designs. anyone know where i can find either of these things?

#tagging#sxeli#b/c you know internet#and#ladymurgatroid#for reasons that should be obvious#yarmulke#patterns#pusheen#this must be a thing that exists#i cannot believe that this is not a thing that exists#come on internet#i'm counting on you#operation pantsnare
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so this past saturday i went down to the garment district with ladymurgatroid to get some alterations made on my new concert dress, and it was such a good experience? like, we walked around, found the tailor shop, went on a SubQuest to find fabric that matched it, went back to the shop, spent another two hours bouncing around, and then went back and picked it up and slowly moseyed back towards our bus stops. and like, doing that on my own would have been completely overwhelming and terrifying b/c like YIIIIIIIKES so much overstimulation and so many possibilities to make Gross Social Missteps or The Wrong Choices About Fabric or to Find A Sub-Par Option But Go With It Anyway Because Saying No Is Hard and like i probably could’ve done it? but it would have been stressful and made me v v sad and lbr i probably would have gotten not as good a result in the end

but instead it was so much fun! b/c i had someone else to anchor me in social situations and be like “no it’s fine we’re fine we can walk into this shop and look at things and not buy anything and also this fabric is not what you want so you should not buy it also you are being silly they definitely said five thirty and that’s probably also what they meant they must be open past five we don’t need to be there an hour early just in case they misspoke hush” and also (window) shopping with someone with a similar aesthetic is just . . . fun? like, finding ways to describe the aura of fabric is so much fun! imagining garments with various prints and whether they would be Good Life Choices is so great! gawking at absurdly tacky things gives me life. and like, do i want to spend six hours doing that every day of my life? no. but do i like that i can do that sometimes? yes. very very very yes

#shopping#window shopping#city of messengers#garment district#ladymurgatroid#my friends are the best#friendventures#the perils of social interaction#social anxiety#nonconfrontational#caps#good things#my life#note to self#squad goals
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ladymurgatroid replied to your photo: “it is still Too Warm to practice today, so i’m trying out some of the...”

ugh I know. lipstick should never smell like anything and nothing should ever smell like fake fruit. mine is ignorable, at least, but still annoying. on the plus side, it looks hellafab

the smell faded after a couple of hours, actually, which was a relief. (or maybe i just got used to it?) tbqh it’s such a perfect shade of purple that i am 100% willing to deal with some residual grape smell to get it on my face. one MUST make SACRIFICES for one’s ART, after all

(it also came of liek woah when i was eating. like, even more so than i am used to, to the point that i basically had none left on after lunch. hopefully it’s non-toxic? it’s gotta be non-toxic, right? it’s made to go on people’s lips they wouldn’t make something like that that would be bad to ingest in small quantities would they???)

#adventures in makeup#lipstick#caps#my conversations#ladymurgatroid
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