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Surviving Sibling Suicide

@survivingsiblingsuicide / survivingsiblingsuicide.tumblr.com

Thoughts, resources, and links related to suicide, sibling loss, and grief. Made in memory of my brother Aidan, who died by suicide on September 30th, 2014.
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The many myths associated with suicide have also contributed to the perseverance of stigma. Notions that people who kill themselves are “cowards” and “selfish” persist to this day, while attempters are often viewed as “attention seekers” who are not to be taken seriously. The idea that suicidality is hereditary can sometimes serve to further torture families who experience a suicidal death.

A major mandate of suicide prevention has been to dispel these myths and to educate and inform the public in an attempt to eliminate stigma.

Suicide and Stigma By Robert Olson, Librarian, BA, MLIS, Centre for Suicide Prevention, https://www.suicideinfo.ca/resource/suicideandstigma/?utm_content=bufferb934c&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer
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“I should emphasize here that suicide bereavement is very different from the mourning that occurs after the natural loss of life (Cvinar, 2005). The mourning process, which is already an overwhelmingly distressful time, is further upset by the presence of stigmatization. Survivors suffer greatly from the building of what Feigelman calls the “wall of silence” by family, friends and the community at large. Because of the nature of the death there may also be an absence of caring and interest or, conversely, an unwelcome shower of unhelpful and awkward advice (2009). The majority of us just do not know how to broach the subject of suicide with the bereaved – so we try not to.”

Suicide and Stigma By Robert Olson, Librarian, BA, MLIS, Centre for Suicide Prevention, https://www.suicideinfo.ca/resource/suicideandstigma/?utm_content=bufferb934c&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer
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The taint of the stigma associated with suicide is no simple metaphor for those who are stigmatized. Many victims suffer from very real psychological scars inflicted by the hurt and shame of attempting suicide or knowing someone who has died by suicide. Misunderstanding, ignorance, and fear are at the root of stigmatization, and these factors have inflicted immense suffering on those who are in any way perceived as 'not normal'.

Suicide and Stigma BY ROBERT OLSON, LIBRARIAN, BA, MLIS, CENTRE FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION, https://www.suicideinfo.ca/resource/suicideandstigma/?utm_content=bufferb934c&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer

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Suicide: Helping Survivors Cope | Psych Central
Why do individuals [die by] suicide? Despite its prevalence, suicide remains highly stigmatized and survivors of suicide often suffer in silence in fear of being judged and criticized. This paper will first examine the prevalence of suicide, focusing on gender, culture, method, and mental illness. Further, this paper aims to explore the impact suicide has on parents, siblings, children, peers, spouses, attempters, and therapist survivors. A thorough examination of the areas of greatest difficulty each survivor group experiences will be done. Finally, a thorough review of treatment guidelines and efficacy will be explored. With these goals, the hope is to shape the therapist's understanding of the suicide based upon the relationship to the victim of suicide, and guide treatment based upon the available evidence of treatment efficacy. Prevalence Based upon 2004 statistical data (Laughinrichsen-Rohling, Friend, & Powell, 2009) suicide was identified as the third leading cause of death among
psychcentral.com
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In addition, siblings have a great difficulty expressing grief, and may have challenges in communicating knowledge for fear of breaking the confidentiality of the deceased sibling. Furthermore, siblings were found to be overlooked often because of a greater focus on parents, and because parents cut off communication to protect the surviving child from information. However, this severing of communication was found to result in an experience of isolation, and did not protect the siblings from developing psychological symptoms (Dyregrov & Dyregrov, 2005; Dyregrov et al., 2015).

http://psychcentral.com/lib/suicide-helping-survivors-cope/

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We know that suicide is the tragic outcome of a serious underlying illness combined with a complicated mix of individual circumstances. It is not a sign of moral weakness. It does not reveal a character flaw. It is not a sign of irresponsibility, or a hostile act. It should not be a source of shame. Reading this paragraph over and over again until it sinks in can help you to make sense of the suicide loss and begin your healing journey.

American Foundation of Suicide Prevention. afsp.org

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