I’m sorry but I’m just here crying and feeling all the feels because Killian Jones is fully convinced that Emma Swan will want nothing to do with him once she learns he killed her grandfather. And yet, even after learning the truth, Emma will still say yes. She will still choose to marry him because there is nothing this man has done in the past that will make her stop loving him and wanting him.Because she loves him fully and completely.

I really think this is the final thing Killian needs so he can finally forgive himself. Because if Emma and the Charmings can forgive him for having done THAT, there's nothing else he has done in the past that they won't forgive him for.

Nothing. Yes, not even Killian unknowingly having killed Charming’s father during his pirate days.

Random thought of the day: today, while doing research for my thesis, I came across a comic book character that seems to now be forgotten in the shadows: The Black Pirate.

The Black Pirate, whose alter ego was Jon Valor, belongs to DC Comics and first appeared in April 1940. Comic Vine describes him as having “no super powers or extraordinary abilities” but he was “a superb swordsman, superior athlete and an accomplished sailor”. He was also known for his strong moral code, sense of justice and for being a “swashbuckling adventurer”.

However, more than anything else, what called my attention was how much the physical appearance of the Black Pirate/Jon Valor resembles our favorite pirate’s (pics under the cut):

Why was Emma so weak and OOC in the wish world??

Because the woman who made the wish was the same who said this:

Up until wish!Emma stopped wish!Henry from killing Regina, she was pretty much exactly what the EQ thinks of her outside of her savior qualities: pointless.

As @whimsicallyenchantedrose​ eloquently said in her episode analysis:

“The characters in this verse are influenced by what the Evil Queen thinks of them, and what she wants their experiences to be.  Why was Princess Emma so weak and ineffective? Because the Evil Queen sees her that way outside of her savior status.  If it wasn’t for the Evil Queen turning her into a savior by casting the curse, the EQ sees her as having no drive or fire at all.  In a way, the EQ sees her act of casting the curse as making Emma what she is. Are we really surprised that the EQ—the unquestionable villain—has such a terrible and skewed image of Emma? Wouldn’t it have really been more OOC if the version of Emma the EQ helped concoct via her wish was just as strong and passionate as real Emma is?” 

(GIF credit)

I think this quote may be foreshadowing what will happen in the future regarding Killian and the shears. When he said this to Emma, he obviously wasn’t thinking about the decision of ordering pizza or chinese, which is why the writers decided to have him respond so seriously to such a mundane thing. When I first watched the scene and saw that he had kept them, I instantly thought he had done it so that Emma can still have a choice later on, in case they don’t manage to help her escaping her fate and she decides to change her mind. What he told her here reinforces that interpretation - it makes me think that he is keeping the shears so that she can have another option in the future instead of immediately throwing away the only thing that can keep her alive. But, ultimately, he knows it is her decision to make and to follow her heart’s desire. This quote shows he is still very aware of that and that he will respect whichever decision she makes. It’s almost as if he’s telling her (and himself) why he is doing this, but of course that, not knowing he kept the shears, Emma will take it as a general statement of his unconditional love. But it did seem to me like he was trying to justify his action and to also ease his own guilt over hiding this from her.

As having always been team “CS haven’t banged yet”, after this last episode, I am now 100% sure they actually have. They have moved in together and in that scene on the docks Jen very clearly played an Emma with bedroom eyes:

(x)

(x)

Like seriously, if we ignore all the angst, Emma was pretty much dying to get home and get some pirate d:

(x)

I just feel like this acting choice of Jen’s can’t be interpreted as anything else.

For the first time in her life, Emma Swan finds herself in love with her now confirmed True Love. They have a house to themselves and they can finally start thinking about their future together.

For the first time in her life, Emma Swan feels loved - by her boyfriend, by her parents (the ones she’s been searching for her whole life), by her son and by her friends. All the holes and voids in her heart are slowly starting to be filled - and then she learns that regardless of what she does, she’s going to die. Soon. There’s no escaping it. And suddenly her entire world, the one she always dreamed of having, just collapses.

So what does she do? She tries to preserve it the most she can, she desperately tries to keep everything as it is. That way she can enjoy the genuine and natural current “ideal” status of her relationships with the ones she loves. Why? Because she knows that the minute she tells them about her doomed fate, the relationships she has always wanted to have will change : everyone will be heartbroken, they will treat her differently and possibly put themselves at risk to save her from her fate. And Emma just won’t have that. So she’ll do whatever it takes to keep things as they are, even if that means keeping everything for herself and lying to them. Anything but causing them any more pain and destroying the near bliss she’s always dreamed of having.

Even though she’s completely wrong by lying to Killian about it, it is human and it makes sense.

Emma Swan Meta: 1x01 (Pilot)

Recently, I decided to re-watch season 1 (still one of my favorite seasons of the whole show) with the goal to pay special attention to Emma and to analyze her character. Hopefully, I’ll be able to put together some Emma metas and to offer my interpretation on the growth and journey of the character. Maybe I won’t be saying anything new but I wasn’t in the fandom during season 1 and I rarely come across season 1 metas so here’s my contribution. These will be under the “Emma Swan Episode Meta” tag on my blog.

So… who is the Emma Swan we meet in the pilot episode? More under the cut.

Emma’s Smile in 5x02

Maybe I’m not really saying anything new here, but I haven’t seen anyone talking about this so I’ll take my chance.

I was rewatching the 5x02 scene in Emma’s house and I remember how we were all wondering why Emma smiled as soon as Killian rejected her advances and walked out the door.

Now it’s quite clear: this was the first time Emma and Killian were alone after Killian crushed Merlin’s heart and Emma erased his Dark One memories. In the beginning of the scene, Emma tells Killian “I was looking for you too”, which suggests that she was probably keeping a close eye on him ever since they got back to Storybrooke, so that she could see if the darkness was having any effect on him. However, watching him from a distance wasn’t enough: Emma needed to spend some one on one time with him to truly know whether the Dark One inside of him was awake or not. She had to test him somehow. And that’s why she seduces him. We know from the events in “Broken Heart” that Dark Hook isn’t opposed to some making out while they should be doing more important things (ahem, finding ways to get rid of the darkness).

So if the Dark One is still messing with his mind, Killian will certainly say yes to some sexy times (just like he did in Camelot), right? Wrong.

“This may be who you think you are, but it’s not who I am”

Oh, the irony. Killian shows no signs of being under the influence of the Dark One and acts as the honorable man Emma loves by refusing to be with her when she’s not herself. He passes the test and she now has the answer she was looking for: her plan to erase his memories and make him forget he is a Dark One worked.

That was her real Killian. Mission accomplished. 

I couldn’t help but notice how similar these shots were. What do they have in common? Excalibur is the symbolization of faith. Just like the magic bean symbolized hope in season two.

In the first moment (5x10), Emma is giving him Excalibur because she doesn’t want to control him - she trusts Killian can fight the darkness. She believes in him and, as a result, she is literally handing him her faith in him. Both it and the sword are now his to take and to either prove whether or not that faith she’s putting on him is justified. We know that in the same episode Killian betrays Emma and I look at this scene as the moment that represents just that - he literally takes her faith in him (Excalibur) from her by playing her. 

However, in the second moment (5x11), Killian has finally decided to be the man (hero) he wants to be. He is now the one handing Excalibur to Emma. In doing so, he is symbolically restoring her faith in him and giving it back to her. Now Excalibur is Emma’s to take - and she does take it, regaining her faith in him. Emma knows that his sacrifice is the ultimate proof of how justified her faith in Killian truly was - and dying as the man he wants to be and as the man she always knew he could be is something she can’t possibly take away from him. Not again. 

“It’s one of those heartbreaking things where the decision that represents love is actually just terrifying.”  ~ Jennifer Morrison (x) 

Love is a weapon.

Speculation for tonight

Work hasn’t allowed me to be around as much as I would like, so forgive me if this has already been stated by other CSers, but I haven’t kept track of what the fandom’s been talking about lately. 

I think we should brace ourselves and prepare our hearts to be completely devastated once today’s episode ends. I don’t know about you, but when dealing with angst I can always handle everything a lot better when I prepare myself in advance to be heartbroken: if everything goes as expected and there’s only pain, I was already mentally prepared for it. If things turn out to not be as bad as I initially thought, great! So it’s a sort of win/win situation here if we’re already expecting lots and lots of pain.

Okay, so tonight’s episode is called “Broken Heart”. Just like “Birth”, I think this has both a literal and a metaphorical meaning. The literal one is connected to Dark Killian (likely under Nimue’s influence) crushing Merlin’s heart to cast the curse. What about the metaphorical one? It will likely be related to CS. How? The episode description says “Hook’s centuries old lust for revenge against Gold puts both of their fates in jeopardy while Emma’s love faces the ultimate test as she tries to convince Hook to turn away from the darkness before she, Mary Margaret, David and Regina embark on a new mission as an unsuspected evil is released”. 

I think dark Killian will fail this test. I’m expecting Emma not to be able to convince him to turn away from the darkness, which will hurt a lot, but... I think we will have some parallels to the season 2 finale:

(GIF credit: ?)

Here Emma also tried to convince Killian to turn away from the darkness by starting to give her the bean back. And we know Emma’s words didn’t change Killian’s plans right away since he gave her an empty pouch.

But then, and also because of his past with Baelfire (as I explained in this post), Emma’s words really got to him and he ultimately decided to turn away from the darkness and he went back to help Team Heroes.

The only difference is that all of this happened in the same episode. This time around, I think 5x10 will end with Hook “stealing the bean” and making everyone think he’s truly a villain now, leaving Emma with a “broken heart”. But then in 5x11 his love for Emma and his strength will finally win against the Dark One in him and, most likely, he’ll end up sacrificing himself to finally get rid of the darkness once and for all. And I’m certain Killian Jones will be the one doing it. When we look at past episodes, the answer was always there, really:

And he definitely will.

Brace yourselves! Lots of pain is coming, but next week our hearts will likely melt like they never have before!

Emma Swan: giving credit where credit is due

I’ve already seen people downplaying Emma and her journey against the darkness, trying to put her on the same level (or even worse) of previous Dark Ones and other villains, so here’s a small reminder that if her True Love wouldn’t have died, Emma would have done what nobody else could do before and she would have destroyed the darkness herself.

(GIF credit)

And no, it wasn’t just because she is the Savior and because she was born without darkness. It was because she was able to fight against her own monsters that tormented her for years and found the courage in herself and those who love her to finally recognize her own value and self-worth, despite all the pain she’s had to endure all of her life.

(GIF credit)

So here’s a post to celebrate the recognition and credit Emma Swan doesn’t always get.

Why the sudden change in Camelot Emma?

From the reactions I had the chance to see (and read) about 5x05, I think it’s consensual that there seems to be some confusion in the fandom as to why, in Camelot, Emma changed so suddenly from one episode to the other. After all, by the end of 5x04, she was no longer seeing Rumple, thanks to Killian’s love and unfading support. Having ended that episode in such a good place, what happened to Emma to the point where she ended up ripping Violet’s heart and metaphorically crushing Henry’s? It sure seems like a dramatic change from the (apparently) peaceful and relieved state of mind we had last seen her in. 

I was confused at first, and it is true the show can still give us some missing pieces that will help in making (more) sense of Emma’s actions in 5x05, but in case that doesn’t happen, I do think there is a 5x04 scene that may help explain the sudden change:

(GIF credit)

By saying this, Emma was basically acknowledging that she really, really wanted a white-picket-fence life with Killian. However, her tone here isn’t hopeful at all. She doesn’t truly believe that such thing is within her/their reach. What changes the way she feels?

(GIF credit)

Killian’s optimistic and hopeful words remind her of who her boyfriend is, of who she is and how they will have to fight for their happy ending together and how giving up simply isn’t an option. And, just like that, Emma’s faith in having a white-picket-fence life with him is restored. Just look at her reaction:

(GIF credit)

Her entire demeanor changes. Faith in Captain Swan is restored. (Killian taking her to a middlemist field and making Rumple disappear certainly helped, too). After this reassurance by Killian, it is then logical to assume that Emma got even more determined to rid herself of the darkness, so that their happy ending was closer and finally within reach.

But this is a double-edged sword, because the darkness is still there, and whereas the real Emma wouldn’t hurt anyone close to her to get what she wanted (or needed), the Emma infected with darkness begs to differ. And suddenly ripping out a 13 year-old’s heart so she can break her son’s heart seems a perfectly legit thing to do (yes, I’m still crying over that scene). And after that, things can only go downwards. And they will.