When you’re followed by a blog with a suspicious URL and risque avatar.

2017: dumb bitch

2018: sad bitch

2019: bad bitch

LET’S GO

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HAPPY 20BITEEN!!! !!! !!!

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When I was 17 my appendix ruptured because I thought I was just having period cramps and didn’t go to the hospital so don’t tell me PMS symptoms are no big deal

this actually happened to me during my math final and i didn’t think anything of it and when i was later admitted to the hospital my math prof was asking me ‘you didn’t have to take the final! why didn’t you tell me it hurt?!?!’ and i told him i’ve had cramps worse.

he gave me 100

This is actually an extremely common occurrence simply because in sex ed they don’t teach you how to tell the difference between menstrual cramps and other more serious pains. The way to tell the difference between cramps and appendicitis is that while menstrual cramps are generalized toward the middle of the stomach below the belly button, pain from a swollen or burst appendix will start in the middle of the stomach and relocate to only the lower right side, even lower than menstrual cramps, and is a very localized pain. It also comes on extremely suddenly and will worsen over time or when you make a sudden movement, like a cough or a sneeze.

Basically, if you’re feeling any sort of pain, even if it’s menstrual cramps, don’t hesitate to tell the school nurse or a parent, or if you’re out of school and home even make a doctor’s appointment. Chances are if your cramps are that bad there’s something they can do to improve that as well.

I am boosting the shit out of that reply, because I am twenty-fucking-five years old and did not know how to tell the two pains apart

Adding another diagnostic tool! This is something we use in the ER called the rebound test. Basically, appendicitis and cramps react differently to certain things. If you’re still not sure if you have cramps or appendicitis, take two fingers and press them into your abdomen where the pain is (try repeating this on the lower right quadrant of the abdomen just to be sure.)

When you press in firmly, it will probably hurt. Here’s the test: LET GO. Does it get better or get worse? Appendicitis will immediately hurt worse when you let go. Cramps will not. Go to the ER if the rebound test makes it worse!

THE REBOUND TEST IS REALLY IMPORTANT.

My husband got sent home from the ER with a rupturing appendix. When he came back and was rushed into surgery, the surgeon was super angry – “Why didn’t anyone do the rebound test?!”

All great info, but there is another lesson to be learned here: if you’re in major pain, it’s probably important - so don’t let anyone tell you it’s not. There is a documented pattern of women who go to the ER with complaints of pain being dismissed as overreacting…when in reality women have an incredibly high tolerance for pain, to the point that some don’t even realize exactly how serious their condition is. These stories only serve to illustrate this point.

Reblog to literally save a life.

Every time I see this..

Reblog this if you want a slightly ominous compliment in your inbox

I fucking forgot that I reblogged this and woke up to some weird shit lmao

i don’t want real compliments tbh i just wanna hear the most ominous stuff ppl could come up with

Ominous positivity hell yeah

i just. really wish ex-christian goyim would stop taking out their hatred of christianity on random jews

a jew: judaism is important to me

someone, emerging from the woodwork: oho but it’s a religion and religion is evil!!! you’re in a cult!!!!

“Also all wars are caused by religion. ALL OF THEM.” - same person prob

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

*stands majestically in a bucket*

ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in

It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.

Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.

The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.

What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?

“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”

What I am saying is that there must have been a process.

Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.

It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.

Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.

Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.

okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.

could he step on land if his shoes are wet?

No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this

What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?

can he be in a wheelbarrow?

What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?

What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?

European swallows or African swallows?

this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:

In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place

why none of them got into The Good Place

What I love about this is its acknowledgment that Jason had no intentions at all

Your 12 recent emojis are how each month of the next year will be for you

In the USA, it’s 100x cheaper to take an Uber to the hospital instead of an ambulance.

I don’t know if this is true or.. Like, having to pay for an ambulance that is taking you to the hospital? That doesn’t make any sense. What kind of distopian world is that?

It costs thousands of dollars to ride in an ambulance

In America some people with chronic health conditions like epilepsy literally have to wear medical IDs that say “don’t call an ambulance/911”. Some well-meaning person calling an ambulance for you will turn into a thousand (or couple thousand) dollars that YOU are on the hook for, even though you didn’t make the call. So, PSA: if you see someone having a seizure, look for a medical ID! You should only call an ambulance if: the person is elderly, pregnant, or the seizure lasts more than 4 minutes. Otherwise, wait for the seizure to pass, then ask the person if they want an ambulance when they regain consciousness.

wtf

Oh my god what. Here in Quebec, if you call an ambulance for something they deem non-emergency, you get a bill later for like $180. But if it’s anything like a loss of consciousness, chest pains, labour, whatever, or if you’re in a public place and a a well-meaning samaritan calls 911, it’s paid for by the government. Seriously, everything about healthcare in the US makes me want to cry.

Imagine a world where you have to wear tags to tell people trying to help you that “It’s ok, don’t try to help, I can’t afford to pay if someone tries to save my life. I’ll just take my chances and hope it’s not life-threatening.”

Literally the point of this post is that Americans do not have to imagine that world. We live in it

Y'all can keep at it with that “Romeo and Juliet fell in love in five days how immature” shiz but Macbeth went from no murder to yes murder in like one afternoon and I feel like one of those is a significantly bigger problem than the other

In his defense his wife triple dog dared him and called him a pussy

When I used to work at the Plant Center, I’d usually get put on stocking inventory, and if a plant came in multiple colors, I’d arrange them chromatically.  The pansies would be arranged to be White, then red, orange, yellow, blue, purple and black.  Or the Dracena would get arranged from lightes-colored leaves to darkest.  I was genuinely surprised how many people noticed and tanked me for it.

There’s a “Welcome ____!”  chalkboard at my vet’s office for the pets who have appointments. Today I found out that if it’s not an emergency/time-sensitve and the owner has no preference, the lady who schedules them does so that the chalkboard will have a theme.   Last time my dog Charleston Chew was in for a checkup, there was also a Snickers (Cat), an Oreo (another cat, bet you can’t guess what color) and a Toblerone (Boa Constrictor) on the board.  Today there were five Baileys of varying species.  I followed her on facebook just to see her “Best Of”

There’s coffe shops and restaurants with jokes or drawings on the sandwich boards or tip jars. Churches with marquees with a good one-liner avery time I drive by (STILL mad I didn’t get a pic of the “LIT FOR CHIST: JOHN 2:1-11″ sign).  Joke flavors of ice cream, Terrible puns for your Wifi Network, my friend who took advantage of her house’s to paint a pair of eyes, a naose, and a wide grin on the otuside of her blinds so the four windows make a face. There’s a million little works of art- color studies and wordplays and small theatrical performances- all around us.

They mean a whole awful lot to me.  I would drive a whole extra mile longer on the way home from school in high school to see what the neighbors with the extensive collection of inflatable lawn ornaments had done now.

If you do these things, please keep it up. I noticed, and it really did make my day that much brighter.

Listen.

Most of us didn’t expect this to be anything but stopping the slide into the abyss.

Don’t kid yourself.

I don’t think any of us are naive, or so idealistic that they can’t see what’s happening around them. Today was simply about giving us time to have a Plan B.

And we’ve achieved that. Control of the House by the Dems is a big deal, or COULD be a big deal. Some of the people who have been elected today – Halland, Davids, Omar and Ocasio-Cortez, for example, though there are many examples – are canaries in the coal mine for some of the fossils in Congress, or they should be, if Pelosi wants to fucking listen to what people are telling her and the other Dems.

So now we have time. What next?

You don’t have to know right this second, but tomorrow, when you wake up and shit still stinks, what’s our Plan B? What do we do tomorrow?

Congratulations. We’ve hit a mile marker on the marathon.

Tomorrow, we wake up, and we keep going.

because apparently this needs to be said AGAIN

in the most general aesthetic terms possible

1600s: most witch-hunts ended in this century. no witches were burned in North America; they were hanged or in one case pressed to death

1700s: the American Revolution. Marie Antoinette. the French Revolution. the crazy King George. most pirate movies

1800-1830: Jane Austen! Pride and Prejudice! those dresses where the waist is right under one’s boobs and men have a crapton of facial hair inside high collars

1830-1900: Victorian. Les Miserables is at the beginning, the Civil War is in the middle, and Dracula is at the end

1900-1920: Edwardian. Titanic, World War I, the Samantha books from American Girl, Art Nouveau

1920s: Great Gatsby. Jazz Age. Flappers and all that. most people get this right but IT IS NOT VICTORIAN. STUFF FROM THIS ERA IS NOT VICTORIAN. DO NOT CALL IT VICTORIAN OR LIST IT ON EBAY AS VICTORIAN. THAT HAPPENS SURPRISINGLY OFTEN GIVEN HOW STAGGERING THE VISUAL DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ERAS IS. also not 100 years ago yet, glamour.com “100 years of X” videos. you’re lazy, glamour.com. you’re lazy and I demand my late Edwardian styles

I just saw people referencing witch burning and Marie Antoinette on a post about something happening in 1878. 1878. when there were like trains and flush toilets and early plastic and stuff. if you guys learn nothing else about history, you should at least have vague mental images for each era

“Les Miserables is at the beginning, the Civil War is in the middle, and Dracula is at the end” sounds like the longest weirdest worst movie I’d pay to see in theatres five times.

Interviewer: where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Me: I used escapist fantasies as a coping mechanism to get through years of trauma and therefore never learned how to plan for a real life future

Alternatively: I went through periods of depression so frequent and intense that I never considered that I’d actually make it to my 20s so now I’m kinda just making it up as I go

hey yall? you can change at any point in your life. you can make the plan that you didn’t make in your teens or whenever. its never too late to stop and take a moment and reflect on what you want to do. especially now that you’ve gotten through the hardest parts of your lives. you got this!! go be your best selves! 

Listen. I know you mean well. But this post is about how people with childhood trauma literally never learned how to do that and how it takes years of therapy to learn the life skills necessary to do so. It's like telling someone they should start biking to work when they never even learned how to ride a bike.

[Text of Tweet: George Takei: If you are turned away at the polls because your name is not on the register, don’t walk away. Say this: I REQUEST A PROVISIONAL BALLOT AS REQUIRED BY LAW.

Don’t let them steal your vote]

Additional info:

“Provisional Ballot Laws are laws that require a provisional ballot upon verficiation of the idenity of the voter if a voter fails to present proper identification at the polls or when registering before voter registration deadlines.”

More here on national provisional ballot laws

Copied from facebook (source: John Young)

Poll worker here! Let’s talk about this “I DEMAND A PROVISIONAL BALLOT AS PROVIDED BY LAW” thing.

== TL:DR; Yes, provisional ballots are important! And yes, you should absolutely ask for one if you need to. But there’s a couple of things to try first. A provisional ballot is a last resort. ==

It’s very common for voters to come up to the “check-in” desk, and not be found in the poll book. Some non-nefarious reasons why that might be the case:

1) The poll worker doesn’t understand how to spell your name. 2) You’re not in the right precinct (this happens ALLLL the time) 3) New married name? 4) You’re a college student, and you are registered, but you’re registered at home.

Here’s my recommendation for what to do: * Make sure the poll worker is looking in the right spot (the book will be right in front of you; you can help find your name.) * Mention your home address to the poll worker. THey may very well immediately say something like “Oh! Yes, you should be voting in the cafeteria. Here in the GYM, we are your next precinct over.” * Ask politely to speak to someone to verify your status with the county. They will get on the phone with county folks, who will look you up in their BIG COMPUTER.

The steps above will, eight times out of ten, change you from the scary status of “Huh? you don’t exist!” to “Oh, right! Okay, here you go, voter!”

If that doesn’t work, ask firmly and politely for a provisional ballot. If you say “AS PROVIDED BY LAWWWWW”, you will only get an eye-roll from a tired and hungry poll-worker. But hey, you do you – it really IS the law.

If you don’t get satisfaction, all is not lost. Step outside the precinct and call the ACLU, and they will send someone over to have some FIRM WORDS with the Judge of Elections.

How do I know? I’ve had ACLU lawyers sent to talk to me during an election: “Hey, we heard that you were turning voters away!” they said.

I wasn’t, but I DID NOT MIND having someone smart and informed come to check on what was up. The ACLU counsel was smart, engaged, and knew the rules. Had I been trying some crap, this person would have SHUT. IT. DOWN.

So, the BOTTOM bottom line is: 1) Provisional ballots are a last resort. You can read up on them; they’re definitely riskier than a full, “real” ballot. You want to vote at your proper precinct as your first choice. 2) Don’t panic if you’re not in the book. Are you in the right place? 3) If you decide you do need a provisional, be firm, polite, and persistent. There’s no “secret phrase” that’s going to make us poll workers hiss with dismay: “CURSESSSSSSS! They know about the provisionalssssss!” 4) But do stick up for yourself! And if you don’t get what you want, call it in! There’s LOTS of folks to help!