paint me in all my mistakes 1/1
PAIRING: Steve /Bucky
SUMMARY:
Brooklyn, NY. Seven years after HYDRA has usurped freedom and democracy, there are rules about personal liberty. Rules about how to conduct yourself in public, and who to be, who to love, who not to love, and so on and so forth, down to which tattoos you can get. Bucky navigates this world like a sleepwalker, mostly detached from all inklings of emotion and reality, until he decides to get a tattoo. And meets Steve. And then emotion and reality come crashing back, because you can only sleepwalk through your life for so long, and also because quite possibly there's more to Steve, and more to life in general, and more to Bucky's life in particular, than anyone could have predicted. A story about the power of love in uncertain times, and the strength you find inside yourself, sometimes in places where you least expect it. Also lots of softness and connection, snappy comebacks, real snark, realer feelings, and the customary Happy End.
A/N: This story is a gift for the incomparable @mxaether and @buckyismybicycle, who are nothing short of amazing. They deserve all the gifts, and here is a tiny little offering from me.
i screamed all about outlined how this story came to pass in my opener notes on AO3, so i won't repeat myself here, but rest assured that without either kam or HR there would be no story. Kindness and support (and also cheerleading and encouragement) go a long way.
(Look, you throw shouty love my way, or you hold my hand in times of trouble, you'll get Words in return. Eventually. 😂 NO. THIS IS NOT AN INSTRUCTION.)
Extra special endlessly grateful love also has to go to the AMAZING @maichan808, who collaborated with me during last year's Shrinkyclinks Double Bang, which was one of the greatest experiences of my life, and who said "yes!" when i asked her if she wanted to contribute art.
AND THEN SHE DID HER THING AND IT'S AMAZING AND SO GORGEOUS AND i CANNOT EVEN. Darling. You make everything better. EVERYTHING. i cannot thank you enough. 💖
Shouty love also needs to go to @anxioussquirrel who beta-ed with endless patience and consummate skill, the way she always does, as well as my Lovely People @booksandabeer, @bittersweet-in-boston, @hanitrash, and @sparkagrace -- because they keep me sane and also encourage me in all the wrong places.
Darlings, ilysm. 💖💖💖
...
Last but not least -- i know the world has changed since i wrote this story, and yes - this is a HYDRA wins speculative scenario - but i promise you, this fic is here to give you hope.
And we all need hope.
OK? OK.
i love you all. 💕💕💕