starfish boi

where am i

i love twitter i love twitter i love twitter

Fun fact about Tobi: I have a blistering personal hatred for Alex Jones. Mostly because he was my mentally ill, brain damaged mother's (I'm not being cruel she literally has a hole in her brain from cancer) introduction to the world of conspiracy theories and alt right bullshit.

So for years, every now and then, I put a curse on him. Curses are fun because they let you feel like you're hurting someone without ever actually doing anything illegal that could conceivably harm them. My curse was in the form of a drawing- Anubis, the Egyptian god of death and judgment, as a jackal, eating the heart out of Jones' chest.

Today I wake up to the news that Jones' stupid fucking Infowars channel was bought by the Onion, who intends to gut it out and use its corpse as a puppet to mock the ignorance the channel once espoused as truth.

I'm not saying there is or is not a god. But I have a sneaking suspicion there might be an Anubis.

Drew another one to celebrate why not. Suffer and die you stupid motherfucker.

with access to the 2022 tumblr vernacular, he'd be unstoppable

#pushing for a house md remake for one purpose only: so we can hear gregory house say 'god forbid women do anything'

grinding and cramming for finals when I'd rather be grinding and cramming. in like a sex way or something. i guess. i dunno. shuffles away sadly. hits my head on a low-hanging branch and bleeds out in the snow

Being a trans dude is like being Schrodinger’s man. I’m a guy when it can be used against me and a woman when it can be used against me, but I’m never “trans” to these transandrophobic fucks

the first person to turn an apple to sauce... what hubris. no other fruit gets this treatment. well, except for the wretched tomato. but that's a punishment, because the tomato is morally corrupt.

joe biden, you stupid fuck. listen to me. Crimes are legal for sitting presidents as long as they’re official actions. Listen: Joe. You have one chance

Even if he decides not to do, y'know, the obvious, there's gotta be some creative ways he can fuck shit up for Trump. Nothing he does in terms of actual policy will stick, but make Trump spend his first hundred days undoing Biden's last 75.

Especially make him undo stuff that will be incredibly popular. Executive order legalizing marijuana nationwide. Declare a free pizza party for the whole country, scheduled for the first week of February.

Declassify Trump's IRS records, his FBI file, and everything available about his personal habits during his previous stay in the White House. Did he ever order any pay-per-view porn? Clog a toilet? The American people deserve to know.

I'm just spit balling here; I'm sure there are even better ideas.

Humbly submitting that it would also be very funny if he resigned and then Kamala did all those things

Honestly resigning so that the country gets a black Asian woman President whether the assholes like it or not would be the funniest thing he could do all on its own.

And actually we all live on a planet that's going to be ravaged by climate change on account of America's absolute and cowardly surrender to big oil.

going back to op’s blog to see the directors commentary in the tags

Bro wake up 116 new genders just dropped

My gender

ah, yes

never gets old.

house is a girl you have to take care of her

the house. a house. your house. building. residence. abode. not that faggot from the tv show

Murphys law of being a trans man is that you're only considered a man when it can be used to hurt you

Discussing baby’s future