Imperial passport of Kublai Khan “I am the emissary of the Khan. If you defy me, you die.” 1240 A.D. [886x960]

i don't need to explain myself you all know what i'm talkin about

nodding furiously at every second of this video

No one tell her who lives in the Netherlands.

i love how Gandalf invested in Hobbits in year one and has been pushing them ever since. Thorin, i hear you need help with a breaking and entering. Can I recommend one of these little cunts? Silent as fuck, trust me. Elrond my dude i know you're skeptical but these four chucklefucks just transported a weapon of mass destruction all the way here. Theoden, you've gotta get yourself a hobbit man, I've got a spare one here. Denathor you big prick, take a hobbit - literally this is the bottom of the range but listen to him sing. Beautiful little bastard.

The mileage on this one is totally normal Elrond. Hey speaking of can I park him here for a while

h/t to @namasteinside for the lol

In "Unfinished Tales" there's a section where the Fellowship gets Gandalf to tell his side of the story about how he recommended Bilbo to Thorin's company and this is literally how it went down:

There were just so many great additions to this post that I had to put them all in one place.

reasons.

You Are Not Immune To fanart of characters who die in canon that has them alive and well, with scars from the wound that originally killed them

dashed out a quick h/c ficlet between homework assignments! (sky & legend)

A symphony of sparks swirled up from the campfire, illuminating the pair of heroes, at once both together and alone, who staved off the darkness of the night with watchful eyes and a contemplative silence.

Until that silence was broken.

“Can I tell you something I’ve never told anyone before?“ Sky’s soft voice, rough from the long night of unacknowledged emotions, wafted amidst the cool night air.

Legend straightened where he sat, at once captivated and terrified by the question, desperate to hear what Sky had to say and yet unable to escape the sensation that he was about to find himself squarely out of his depth.

my trick for getting through grad school is learning to navigate the quadrants with all their nuances

underrated lotr moment is gandalf’s “let me risk a little more light” so the fellowship can see the ruins of dwarrowdelf.

idk what it is idk how to put it into words but like. such a quick and quiet little moment of, recognizing we’re all in constant mortal peril but while we’re here you should still witness the wonders of the world. while we are here, though it may be on a life-threatening quest, you deserve a little tourist moment. soak it in, the great city that remains long-abandoned and nearly forgotten, the grand pillars that outlived the memories of those who built them. so much of love and life is fleeting in this dark age. but the scraps of it can still be found. the remnants are still here, and even with significant risk they deseve to be beheld.

And Howard Shore went “Do it, Mithrandir, I’ve got your back.” 

#and when you consider that this comes after gimli talked at length about the glory of khazad-dum and the place it holds in their history #and then got there to find it abandoned and shattered and filled with goblins and the bodies of his kin #it's this moment of almost like... affirmation? #no you were not wrong to speak of it this way; yes it is as glorious as you have heard and more #countless dwarves fought and died for this place; it is worth the risk to see what they died for; why they believed it *worth* dying for #gimli is the only dwarf on the quest and in that moment the rest of the fellowship get to see that the creations of his people #are EVERY BIT as spectacular and awe-inspiring as those of elves and men #the movies did gimli wrong in a lot of ways but they NAILED this bit @arafinwes

The first two books are, particularly, a tour of Middle Earth and why it's worth saving. Merry and Pippin would, of course, gladly save The Shire on Bilbo and Frodo's accounts alone, and Sam will do whatever the others choose if it's right. But once war breaks out, why is Rohan worth saving? The Elves are leaving, Lothlorien will be abandoned, so why does Fangorn matter?

Well, luckily, we've been given a soldier's tourist guide to Middle Earth. And so Moria and Mirrormere are beautiful and sad places that should be preserved.

Being obsessed with your own ocs is so so good for you i seriously can't recommend it enough

The only downside is that you have to do Everything around here

You are a villain famous for “killing” heroes. In reality, heroes come to you to fake their deaths.

Sometimes they try to pay you.

You are posted out by the Hollywood sign tonight, sitting under the frame where the W used to be. It got burnt to a crisp during last week’s big superhero fight. A hero died right where you’re sitting. The whole area’s been closed down until Hero Force can coordinate a recovery effort. Usually it’d be done by now but no one’s willing to touch it until the ash has been completely blown away.

It’s a rule that the world must stand still when a hero dies.

“How much?”

The voice comes from behind you. The lights that illuminate the Hollywood sign are down to hide as much of the scorch marks as possible. You wouldn’t be able to see anything even if you did turn around, so you don’t.

You put some chapstick on, the glide of the balm against your wind chapped lips grounding.

“I said,” the Hero says, voice tightening, “How. Much.”

There’s the sound of gravel crunching now. They’re wearing heavy boots and the scent of fresh blood grows stronger the closer they get. Their breathing is smooth and even which means it’s not their blood.

You put the cap back on your chapstick and tuck it into your leather jacket’s inner pocket. “I don’t take money.”

“Then what do you take?” The Hero rounds the Y and comes into your line of sight. The dark hides most of their features, but you can make out a glittering gold mask and the dull shine of drying blood on their chest plate. Their breathing may be even, but their stance isn’t. They sway in place, back and forth, back and forth. Their arms wrap around their stomach. “I’ve got land. A house. You can have it.”

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being a writer leads to a genuinely helpful but also very stupid kind of mindfulness where you'll be having a sobbing breakdown or the worst anxiety attack of your life and think "okay, I really need to pay attention to how this feels. so I can incorporate it into my fanfiction."

I know discourse is the word of choice in fandom nowadays but I kind of wish we would have stuck with “fandom wank” because it carries the implication that the anger involved culminated into effectively nothing and that the act was wholeheartedly masturbatory in nature rather than for any greater cause.

I saw this post about an hour after I saw a post that said, essentially, “There should be a word for that thing where [exactly describes ‘squeeing’].”

I feel like the time has come to produce something like this:

citrus 

@vergess

Squee: The noise you make when something is so good that all you can really do is squeak or squeal. A high pitched sound of delight, often accomanied by hugging yourself or others.

Squick: A fic/art/concept/topic that is repellent to you, so you reject association with it and instead retreat to your personal comfortable spaces- all the while remembering that someone else’s comfort is not your own.

YKINMKATO: Also called “kink tomato.” Abbreviation meaning “your kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.” Used to explain why you are rejecting art or fic brought to you by someone else. A solid mantra to recall instead of sending flames in people’s comments

Flames: The comment equivalent of anon hate.

AMV: “animated music video” or “anime music video.” Often, this is stylized to fit a specific fandom, such as a “PMV” (pony music video) in my little pony. May also be referred to as a lyricstuck.

Filk: Combination of the words “film” and “folk,” this is a music genre, to which “fan songs” and “fan parody covers” belong. If you don’t really understand what this means, take a quick listen to American Pie, then compare Weird Al Yankovic’s Saga Begins

BNF: Big name fan. You know that one person who is just so fuckign popular in your fandom? Their art is always on your dash, everyone knows their fics? Being spoken to directly by them is basically being noticed by everyone ever’s senpai? That’s what these people are called.

DL:DR; Not unliked the teal deer (tl;dr, or “too long, didn’t read”), DLDR means “don’t like? Don’t read!” It’s a reminder that you are under no obligation, ever, to expose yourself to uncomfortable (or, squicky), or potentially harmful (or, triggering), material. Not ever. If you don’t actively like something? It’s not worth your time. Skip it.

Gen: or “genfic” “genart” etc. Fan works which contain no or very little romantic content. Often these are styled after the canon material, and may be called “episodic” ro “slice of life” in addition. 

Lemon: Work containing strong pornographic elements

Lime, or Citrus: Work containing mild or implicit pornographic elements

Sockpuppeting: The surprisingly common scenario of someone making a bunch of fake accounts/sideblogs to send themselves reviews or hate, to try to increase views or drama surrounding a work. The accounts they make are called Sockpuppets. 

WAFF: Warm and fluffy feelings. A genre of fic that exists just to be therapeutically sweet. Nowadays, usually just called “fluffy.”

Schmoop: Take WAFF and somehow make it even more syrupy. You’ll know it when you see it.

Whump: Imagine if you will, a hurt-comfort fic. The comfort might be considered WAFF. The hurt? That’s the whump.

Wapanese: When white autors pepper their anime fanfic with random, tonally inappropriate japanese words. 

Anthropomorfic: Nowadays we just call these “humanstuck” or “humanized AU.”

Wank: Wildly disproportionate drama that crops up because someone wrote/drew/did something that someone else didn’t like. Seriously, I cannot begin to express the fiascos that have come about from all this. Just… Just go look at this.

 Plot bunny: Story ideas that you probably won’t ever actually deal with, but that multiply entirely out of control, creating huge worlds in your head that you’re probably not going to write. But hey! You might! And until then they make great sideblogs/askblogs/tumblr posts.

Casefic: Fanfics that try to create an episode-like feel for procedural and crime dramas, moster of the week shows, etc.

Jossed: When popular fan theories and fanon are addressed in the canon of a series, and whoops, turns out we were all very, very wrong.

Kripked: When popular fan theories and fanon are addressed in the canon of a show and, hot damn, we fucking called it.

Secret Masters: The people who run the websites/ communities/etc that we all do our fanning on. Less relevant now that we have things like tumblr, but when everyone had to run their own archival and social sites for each fandom, it was more important to pay our respects to the strange and powerful beings that brought us all together and gave us our fannish homes. Think the staff of AO3, for example.

Bashing: When a writer purposefully writes a specific character as a horrible, horrible person so that they can throw them out of the storyline, usually to allow their OTP to get together without trouble. Distinct from fridging in that it doesn’t require the character to die, but rather to be such a screaming harpy that they get rightfully removed from the main characters’ lives for being an abusive hell beast. Generally, a type of character hate. Be wary of people who bash women, queer people, and POC with consistency: they are not safe to be around.

‘Squick’ also has an alternate horrible meaning for Harry Potter fans who were in fandom a while back. Dear god.

Drabble: A fic that is EXACTLY 100 words. Often used as a creative exercise in telling a story in a very small constraint.

Ficlet: Fic that clocks in somewhere between 100 to 2.5K words.

Crossover: A piece of media in which two or more source materials are treated as the same universe. Characters from Fandom A can meet characters from Fandom B. (The Doctor Goes To Hogwarts And Meet Harry Potter!)

Fusion: A fusion takes the characters of one source material and *surplants* them into another universe entirely. Characters from Fandom A cannot meet characters from Fandom B. (Dave Strider is part of an Inception team!)

TPTB: The Powers That Be. Almost always redundantly referred to as “the TPTB.” A collective term for showrunners, actors, producers, writers, et al, anyone who is part of the team that creates the source material.

YMMV: Your Mileage May Vary. A shorthand way of saying “this is how I see it/have experienced it though I realize others might have a different perspective.”

Tinhatting: Often used in RPF fandoms, the situation where some fans are convinced two celebrities are in a relationship but its being kept a secret.

I’m…I’m home

Useful beyond all reason. I’ve learnt so much!!

how long has drabble meant exactly 100 words i always used it to describe anything super short

That was it’s original form, the limerick of prose.

[image: the yellow, green, and white cover of Merriam-Webster’s Old Fandom–New Fandom Dictionary. it is “Completely revised and updated” with “More than 40,000 entries, including verb conjugation and all citrus categories”. the New York Times calls it “An indispensable resource”; the Onion calls it “a flawless translation guide too good for this world, too pure”; LJ user bofq1138 says “I can’t believe we’re still having this conversation.”]

There have been wars over the word “drabble” since the first time I ever saw the word. People who write proper drabbles insisting that the word means exactly 100-word stories (not including title and/or summary), and lots of people going “doesn’t it just mean any short story?” and the people who write the 100-word fics retorting that there are many, many words for “a short fic” (vignette, ficlet, one-shot, etc), but drabble is the only one that tells you exact word count. However, these days it may be a losing battle; in Ye Olden Days back on LJ and DW, part of what kept the “100-words” meaning as the primary meaning was that there were whole communities of nothing but drabbles in the strict sense. My favorite was tth100 (https://tth100.livejournal.com/), a community for people to write Buffyverse crossover drabbles. Let me tell you, it’s tough enough to write a story in 100 words. Writing a crossover in 100 words is much harder.

greenest wolf ive ever seen.