@spidey-official / spidey-official.tumblr.com
↳ you obviously did cause otherwise why would you even be reading this
all original posts are under queue
id & ss is under irondad and spiderson
all of my posts are under spider speaking
dd, dp, and sm shenanigans are under team red
it’s always the quietest nights when some guy with a fishbowl on his head decides to ruin your evening
caught the lizard trying to escape through the sewers. do you know how bad sewer webs smell? do NOT recommend
not to brag, but i’ve dodged more shoes thrown by angry citizens than actual villain attacks
someone just asked me if i could talk to spiders. like... no, dude. if i could, i'd tell them to pay rent.
hey spiderman you yanked my car door off to throw at a robber are you gonna pay me back for that
chkkttt sorry you're chkkkkk breaking up kkkkkttch chhhkkkk
got called a ‘public nuisance’ by jjj. which, honestly, is an upgrade from last week when i was 'new york’s #1 threat'
sometimes i think the real villain is whatever algorithm keeps recommending me ads for yoga pants
when a villain monologues for 15 minutes straight i’m like, bro, i’m not paid by the hour
thinking about making an announcement to the avengers that we're actually three different people (and that many of them are scarily nonobservant)
are you all perhaps wearing a trenchcoat because that's the only feasible explanation for this 🧐
spiderman, you need to learn about plural systems if you truly consider yourself a hero :)
i was joshing dw
thinking about making an announcement to the avengers that we're actually three different people (and that many of them are scarily nonobservant)
are you all perhaps wearing a trenchcoat because that's the only feasible explanation for this 🧐
I'm about to blow your mind
thinking about making an announcement to the avengers that we're actually three different people (and that many of them are scarily nonobservant)
are you all perhaps wearing a trenchcoat because that's the only feasible explanation for this 🧐
do villains ever stop to think, ‘hey, maybe i should just not rob a bank today’? like take a day off, dude, it’s okay
There should just be a day that it's illegal to steal stuff so that they won't steal stuff. Because it would be illegal
that's so smart bro you should, like, be president or smt
Nah man I don't think I meet the height requirement
oh my bad man didnt mean to bring up such a sensitive topic
Please have some respect for the dwarf please
im sorry ill repent
sometimes i think the worst part of being a superhero isn’t the villains—it’s having to remember to recharge my phone
do villains ever stop to think, ‘hey, maybe i should just not rob a bank today’? like take a day off, dude, it’s okay
There should just be a day that it's illegal to steal stuff so that they won't steal stuff. Because it would be illegal
that's so smart bro you should, like, be president or smt
Nah man I don't think I meet the height requirement
oh my bad man didnt mean to bring up such a sensitive topic
sometimes i think the worst part of being a superhero isn’t the villains—it’s having to remember to recharge my phone
hi spiderman. it is me again. crime
i am quitting crime because you :(
yay
