a thought: the clone wars lasts a very long time, long enough produce a clone who is (accidentally) very force sensitive, long enough for them to train as a jedi and long enough for them to fight alongside their brothers.

so this clone is created, and because of one-in-a-billion genetic mutation their midichlorian count is sky high. the jedi overseeing the clones’ training requests that they be brought to the temple. in this scenario, the accelerated aging process is able to be turned off.

how would that feel? what would that be like? on the one hand the jedi is an environment where most people are displaced early on in their life from their original culture, where family and origins aren’t considered of importance. the jedi don’t culturally go through a process of seeking out their birth families which the jedi clone would lack; on the flip side, the potential pain and consequences of that displacement isn’t recognised at all in canon, there’s little discussion of what it feels like to be taken from your culture and have all your important life choices made for you.

it’s also an environment where all needs are catered for, and where war may have been the prevailing purpose for years (and begins to weigh on the older jedi somewhat), but is not the sole purpose of the jedi. this clone knows that they’re made for more than war, but they’re keenly aware of what, in another life, their life might look like.

by the point the jedi clone is old enough to begin training properly as an initiate, clones have been thoroughly assimilated into coruscanti society and temple life. they’re probably aware the moment they leave the temple (and even within it, at times) that they are part of a class of people that is considered inferior, that is considered subhuman in some respects, who are treated much more like useful objects than people by many.

yet they are also a jedi, a class of people who are considered superior by many and receive great respect, they are also highly prized whilst being exactly the same as others who are treated like dirt, and it’s a cause of conflict. they are also exposed to all of these societal attitudes as a child, whereas most clones don’t leave the sanctuary of kamino until they are adults, where most work on the battlefield. and perhaps don’t internalise their social status as strongly as this jedi clone might.

i think as a jedi clone you might be tempted to strongly distance yourself from the category of clone, to distinguish yourself, to make yourself something else. you might dedicate yourself more strongly to jedi culture and traditions than most. at the same time, you would want to show that you’re more than just diligently following orders, you might allow yourself to be rebellious. you also might - before you begin to fight yourself, before you recognise them as brothers - look down your nose a bit at the rest of the clones (this comes from a place of fear and insecurity), if possible avoiding interaction with them (you are not only an oddity to the world, but also to the clones themselves).

this would likely change as soon as you become a padawan and have to fight alongside them of course. you’re aware that these people are brothers you never truly knew, they are a lost family that you can’t really ever be part of. they refer constantly to a life you didn’t know, an upbringing that’s alien to you, because they do eventually slip up around you and forget you’re not exactly one of them. you ask them questions about their lives which most jedi refrain from - or at least, the adult masters refrain from - about kamino, about home, about what family is to them.

you ask your weary captain, who’s done and seen it all, who’s seen too many brothers fall, who’s been out in the field for years now, his age: he’s fourteen, the same age as you. he asks you if you know your CT number: you don’t. you know it exists on a file somewhere that is clearly accessible which you have never attempted to seek out. the next time you return to the temple, you go to the library and look it up, scribbling the numbers it down on a piece of paper (a rarity on coruscant, an item considered luxurious by many), and lock it in a small, plain box in your chambers. it’s your only possession; your master was a stickler for that are rule. you meditate on the meaning of your conflict, how your lives aren’t so different yet so completely different. “brother”, you decide, has a nice taste to it.