Does anyone else also do this thing where when you find media you enjoyTM you put off consuming more of it because it feels too strong/you don't want it to be over/you're saving it for the perfect moment to consume (newsflash the perfect moment never arrives.) Or are you, like, normal.
Not normal, no
actual scene as it happened in the show
Reposting again because I love it so damn much
Did I really just make GIFs of this entire interaction? You bet your butts I did. The members at our discord server asked, and I delivered. So, here you go. (Watch out for part 2 soon)
Oh god, the vulnerability on Crowley’s face 💔
Okay so we've all talked about the scene where Nina asks Crowley if Aziraphale is his "bit on the side" or whatever and Crowley has that visable fanfiction "oh" moment on his face afterwards. And I know a lot of people think it must have been Crowley realizing that he was in love with Aziraphale, but that's never sat right with me. Crowley is emotionally repressed and oblivious, sure, but he's been down bad for that angel since the beginning. I just can't believe he didn't know it the whole time. That can't have been what he was reacting to. Hell, just the nervous swallow he does at the beginning of that conversation implies that he knows exactly what Nina is about to ask him, meaning he at least already has that idea in his head.
I think what he was reacting to was Nina's last comment, "other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own" (I'm quoting from memory but I got the gist of it).
Crowley has been in love for a long time by this point. He's also, for that entire time, understood that nothing can be done about it. Up until Armageddon failed, there was no universe where Crowley and Aziraphale could safely be together, and Crowley cares too much about Aziraphale to truly risk his safety (although he does have his selfish moments--that need to know that Aziraphale cares for him too, that he's not completely alone in this partnership). Nothing could change, so there was no point in doing anything about it.
In the few years post Armageddon, though, it seems like QUITE a bit has changed for the two of them. Remember, these are two immortal beings...a few years is milliseconds to them. But in those milliseconds, it seems like Crowley has become a regular establishment in the bookshop, glasses off and all. Aziraphale felt comfortable enough with him to ask to borrow the Bentley, Crowley's prized possession and his literal home. They've gotten COMFY in a very short amount of time, objectively, and I'm sure it felt like big change to Crowley, who knows better than to ask for things he doesn't think he can have.
But Nina's comment. "Other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own". A direct parallel to exactly how Crowley has been thinking about her and Maggie this whole time--two people who just need a push (romantic awning, anyone?) and everything else would fall into place. Easy. Uncomplicated.
Crowley's "oh" moment isn't that he's in love with Aziraphale. It's that maybe being in love with Aziraphale doesn't have to be complicated.
Other people's love lives DO seem more straightforward than Crowley's own. But if Nina feels that way about him, as sure as he is about her and Maggie...could it be that easy? Could he have that with his angel? I don't think at this point that Crowley has any doubt about whether or not Aziraphale feels something for him (whatever that something may be in Crowley's mind), but after all...Aziraphale asked him to slow down. So he's been taking it slow. Hanging around more. Leaning into his space. Soaking up every second of Az's smiles like a dying man, content with whatever he's given.
But Nina. She thinks they're together already. No doubt in her mind. She thinks it's so straightforward, that of COURSE they're together, two people who look at each other with that much love in their eyes must be, right? And I think that "oh" is Crowley's realization that maybe it IS straightforward. After all, they're them, right? No more Heaven, no more Hell, no actual reason they couldn't just...be together. In that moment, Crowley isn't realizing that he's in love with Aziraphale. He's known he's in love for a very long time. No, that moment was him realizing that, maybe, he can stop pretending not to be, that maybe all they have to do is stop pretending they aren't everything to each other. Does he need to slow down if there's no danger to avoid?
When Nina and Maggie confront him at the end, encourage him to confess...objectively, I don't think Crowley as a character would agree to anything nearly that vulnerable without a LOT more convincing. But he does agree. And you could argue that it's because of Gabe and Beez, sure, but when has Crowley ever used other angels and demons as reasoning behind his choices? No, consistently, Crowley has followed humans every time. Gabe and Beez are nothing but conveniently timed examples. I think that even without G and B running off together, Nina and Maggie could've convinced him after nothing but this "oh" conversation with Nina.
When Crowley is choking out his confession in the final 15 of episode 6, so desperate to make Aziraphale understand...he says "we're a pair, a group, a group of the two of us, and we've spent our existence pretending that we aren't". That's the point he's trying to get across. They can stop pretending, they can stop pretending, please, god, stay here Aziraphale and don't make him keep pretending.
Please, Aziraphale, he's saying. Don't go back. I only just realized that it doesn't have to be complicated. He realized that, maybe, finally, he was allowed.
Oh, he thought, out there on the sidewalk with Nina, there's nothing left but me stopping me from being happy.
Oh, he thought, while Nina and Maggie urged him to communicate, the couple that so perfectly mirrored his own wants, I could tell him how I feel.
Oh, he thought, as Aziraphale looked at him with excited eyes and explained that he wanted them both to go back to Heaven, that Crowley could become an angel again, that they could go right back to working for the very thing that had been keeping them apart for thousands of years. Oh, oh god. I thought it was over. I thought we were free. I thought that, finally, maybe, it could be easy. Maybe we can stop pretending.
And he kissed him. Because fuck, just like with Nina and Maggie, he thought it could finally be easy, but then communicating didn't work and nothing was easy and all he had left was one fabulous kiss and vavoom and he was desperate and off script and so, so scared and then he was alone in the Bentley, driving away from the bookshop, completely alone.
Maybe Crowley should've kept pretending. It would've hurt less.
Oh 💔
So this morning, my fic The Last Angel reached 700 comments on AO3. And I know, for some authors in this fandom that's peanuts, but for me? It's a BIG deal.
It's 700 precious moments of interacting with the beautiful people in this fandom to talk about something I created. It's 700 beautiful opportunities where I was able to see how my words and my story affected someone else. It's hundreds of tear-filled thank yous and emojis and hearts that I tried to shower like fairy dust onto every single person who took time to read my work and talk to me about it.
So, thank you again, to EVERYONE who spent a few extra minutes after reading my angsty, action packed, overly-ambitious story and decided to share their thoughts with me. Our discussions were always SO joyous and wonderful, at least from my side.
Tagging a few of the MVPs of commenting on here. There are SO MANY more, but I don't know their tumblr usernames🥺: @masnadies @di-42 @lickthecowhappy @beerok23 @smua70 @ochre-sunflower , @addledmongoose , @crowleysgirl56
And to everyone else who questions the importance of commenting on fics, PLEASE DO. Comments are a spark of joy in an otherwise dim world, where authors can shower you with thanks for the generosity of your time.
Please give us an opportunity to thank you.
Each comment you've received and will receive is so, SO very well deserved!
It's us who have to thank you for dedicating your time, talent and energy to writing the beautiful stories we can enjoy! ❤️❤️
GOOD OMENS 1.02 “The Book”
Underrated bitchy Aziraphale moment.
But look at Crowley in that last gif. He’s doing everything in his powers to not let that smitten smile take over.
Recently I am terribly afraid of loosing the hyperfixation I have for Good Omens.
I love them with all my soul so much but im terrified of waking up one day and not loving them anymore.
It's almost like I wasn't the one who choose what I love but a random part in my brain with a gauge that will end at some point or another while I would have liked it to last forever.
Does anyone relate to this ? Has anyone written something about it ?
Dear Friend,
I've been through this kind of thing before, so please let me try and give you some comfort.
When I was in high school, my hyperfixation was Lord of the Rings. I knew all the lore, I could write in Cheater's Elvish, I learned the movies and special features line for line, I knew a recipe for lembas bread and made it with some regularity. I had posters and puzzles and a shrine. And one day, I felt it fading until one day it was no longer my favourite thing in the world.
Here's what I learned: the love never leaves. The hyperfixation does - the desperate need to consume every drop for the sake of your soul leaves. And what's left is a steady, solid love that lingers forever. I still love Lord of the Rings. It takes almost nothing for that part of my soul to wake up and join the party. It's never left. And everything I've ever truly loved as a piece of media or community has been the same.
These things that we love so deeply and dearly touch our souls, and help us to grow as people. They are a part of us, and we carry them with us even when the desperate hunger of hyperfixation fades. That's why I got a Good Omens tattoo. For me, for you, for so many of us, it has become something that's so much more than a book or a show. And I know that, decades from now, when my walls are no longer plastered in Husbands fanart, I'll be able to look at my arm and think fondly of Crowley and Aziraphale. And still, even then, I will love them.
I guess you could say it's ineffable.
So I hope this helps. I hope it helps you rest easier.
With Love,
Puffin
Omg, this! I relate so much.
Also, the Lord of the Rings, yes. “When he had gone and passed again into the outer world, still Frodo the wanderer from the Shire would walk there, upon the grass among elanor and niphredil in fair Lothlórien”.
I wish I could be normal about things. Here's an animation I made after watching Season 2 of Good Omens. Spoilers?
Something to be watched over and over
Danny Motta's good omens final 15 face journey is so relatable. 😭
God, I thought I was having fun watching Danny watch ep.6, and then I remembered how much it hurts. It still hurts so much! Fuck 😭
Today Crowley walked into the kitchen and found Aziraphale on his toes trying to reach something in the cupboard. He walked up behind his angel and grabbed it for him, laughing softly at Aziraphale’s huff of frustration. He blushed when he received a thank you kiss.
Aw
Crowley still dreams about Aziraphale
Crowley and Aziraphale don't need a quiet retirement in the countryside.
What they really need is for their South Downs cottage to be part of an HOA and spend the rest of their existences facing a common enemy of powertripping geriatric citizens and nosy neighbours.
I want 10 seasons of Crowley's plans for a carnivorous garden being turned down and him going scorched earth on the head of the HOA comittees' award winning Dhalia patch. I want 10 seasons of Aziraphale sniffing out HOA policy loopholes like a truffle pig or maliciously complying when he can't get out of something.
Oh gosh, this. This.
It would be the best spin-off ever.
Bildad the Shuhite is workin' 9 to 5!
Bildad. I love you.
Good Omens + Parallels
I'm a demon. I booped.
