Communism

Deamus Thoughts; because I can’t these two out of my head

i like to think that draco malfoy’s boggart is himself

but not like sixteen year old draco malfoy, i mean six year old malfoy.

like he’s not afraid of himself and what he could do, but what he’s done and how his younger self would react to what he’s become. 

he’s a war criminal and he’s pretty much an accessory to murder, the murder of his headmaster bc no matter how much the malfoys and purebloods and slytherins hate dumbldore he was still dumbledore.

and i just: 

he’s seventeen, its been less than a year since the war and somehow he fids a boggart. he expects it to be his crazy aunt bella like it was when he was four and he accidentally ran into one in the depths of the manor, or his mother disappointed in him like it was when he was 13, but no. its him and he’s six and draco cant handle it. bc its not just him being afraid of what happened during the war or what he did during he war, or anything else that he would have guessed. its the startling, paralyzing realization that he’s afraid of who he’s become and how he’s react to tat if he was still six and he’d never heard ofa death eater or voldemort and didn’t know how heavy the weight of the dark mark was and that the snake and skull on lucius’ arm was only a tattoo that he and his buddies had gotten out of hogwarts when they were young and stupid and it didn’t mean anything.

children are the best judges bc they see only truth and the good and i think that for draco to be scared of what six year old malfoy would say to him means that he expects even his own past to hate im for what he’s done.

GIVE MY SON A BREAK

Do you think drag broomstick races were a thing? Like late night quidditch pitch obstacle courses with idiot wizards and witches and their modified brooms trash talking and false bravado? aerial maneuver competitions with shitty bottles of liquor as rewards?

love the idea that they had to have someone handy w/ healing charms on hand

And would give bonus points for special moves invented by generations past

And I said quidditch pitch but this was probs more of an outside school activity – behind those awful, ostentatious pureblood manors and empty fields

ϟ 95) When Teddy was an infant, his hair turned color to match that of the person he wanted to hold him. This worked well when he wanted his godfather, which was often, but it became incredibly confusing when he sought a Weasley. There were many hasty rounds of pass-the-baby-because-dear-god-stop-the-crying.

What about when his hair turned pink and they could do nothing about it :’(

what have you done

@some-like-it-luke-warm

@calicogals

Ok but can we PLEASE talk about Remus in Sirius’ sweaters? And they’re too big for him? So the sleeves are too long and he just walks around ths commin room with bear paws and James is just like “you’re like a teddy bear moony” and Remus pretends to be upset but Sirius loves it he thinks his bf is adorable

omg but imagine the jumpers being too short for him bc remus is tall as shit so like remus walks around with these baggy crop top jumpers and sirius like dies

@calicogals

@calicogals

My favorite head canon is that Mcgonagall actually had a pet cat that looks EXACTLY like her animagus form and lets it wander around Hogwarts to put all her coworkers on edge

It’s only after it pisses in Snape’s office, jumps up on Flitwick’s lap and starts kneading, and serenely and thoroughly licks its ass in front of Sprout that they begin to suspect. Dumbledore, of course, knew the whole time, and played along–having entire one-sided conversations with it, letting it sit in on meetings McGonagall didn’t particularly feel like attending, and occasionally Charming objects like quills and parchment to make it seem like the cat was grading

omg just imagine how the marauders would’ve dealt with umbridge

charmed her plated kittens to mew obscenities

locked her out of her office (and classroom)(on multiple occasions)

eaten loads of mcgonagall’s biscuits because she would’ve been a teacher on staff and been aware of remus’s lycanthropy, so there would be loads of issues there. daily detentions because they would put up with zero percent of her bigoted bullshit.

fucked in some way with that horrid black bow

charmed her personal quill(s) to act as the detention ones did

come up with appropriate nicknames

transfigured her cardigan to be two sizes to small

trained the suits of armor (and perhaps peeves) to croak like a toad when she walked by

ensuring she knew they still made it out of the castle even though she’d banished them from going to hogsmeade

changed the wording of all the decrees by one or two letters to completely reverse the meaning of said decree

sending mock (horribly inappropriate) suggestions for clubs and societies to be formed at hogwarts

put doxy droppings in her sugar bowl

pissed in her tea

maybe started an illegal dueling club

if they had to go the loo, inviting her to join them in the loo so she could make sure their gathering of more than two students was alright to form

changing the lyrics to every christmas carol to abuse her

dungbombs are child’s play–her office would’ve been fucked with on a daily basis

harry and draco wouldn’t even realize they were being romantic half the time

they’d still be bitching and snapping at each other and ron would walk in and be like

omg harry wots malfoy doing in your lap

and harry would be like oh

idk he just decided to sit there

and draco would mutter some slur about poor people

I am so here for this

idk he just decided to sit there

I want a short story on Fred and George staring at this blank piece of paper and trying to figure out why Filch would label it “Dangerous”. Then I want them going through every possible variation of “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” before actually hitting the right words.

Example: “I promise I’m gonna fuck shit up.”

Mr. Moony would like to ask Messrs. Weasley why they think such foul language is necessary to accomplish mischief.

Mr. Wormtail would like to inform Messrs. Weasley that they are getting warmer.

Mr. Padfoot would like to high five Messrs. Weasley.

Mr. Prongs would like to have a pint with Messrs. Weasley as they seem just like his kind of people. As long as they solemnly swear it.