being a cat is like hellooooooo is anyone here going to be small and loud????? and then you dont wait for an answer

she let me hit cause i support my public library

vehicular manslaughter chappell roan be like you can hit a hundred boys with cars

entomologist chappell roan be like you can keep a hundred bugs in jars

nasa scientist chappell roan be like you can put a hundred probes on mars

rapper chappell roan be like you can spit a hundred fire bars

russian revolutionary chappell roan be like you can overthrow a hundred czars

scandinavian chappell roan be like you can fuck a hundred guys named lars

polish chappell be like you can eat a hundred bowls of barszcz

twilight sparkle chapell roan be like you can pretend that a hundred airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars

Spider solitaire chappell roan be like you can sort a hundred playing cards

SOMEONE FINALLY PUT IT INTO WORDS!!!

guYS THE FUCKING SIGNS

Not only would this work on me this is the best thing you could ever do

noncon friendship

Coworkers

scurvy has got to have one of the biggest disease/treatment coolness gaps of all time. like yeah too much time at sea will afflict you with a curse where your body starts unraveling and old wounds come back to haunt you like vengeful ghosts. unless☝️you eat a lemon

can’t get over when famous gangster lucky luciano was like “hey lansky seems like quite a hassle getting all those nazis offa your terf you want us to help ya out” and meyer “Left Russia Because of Pogroms and Became A Gangster In The US” lansky was like “no. no getting to beat the shit out of nazis is reward enough for us. sorry lucky this one’s personal don’t worry about it”

here’s a quote from a New York Times article abt it

also bonus quote from that article

“quick question about the punching, judge perlman: how about murder instead”

everybody says that “the government” enlisted these mobsters to beat up nazis, but like. no. no that didn’t happen? judge nathan perlman illegally called up a man who could have him shot dead at a minute to say “hey. i’ve scoured the fucking law books tryna find a way to get these fucking nazis out of here, but my legal means have unfortunately run out. so-” and meyer fucking lansky was like “ah say no more boss lemme call a buncha friends and we’ll get this sorted out real quick don’t even bother paying me.“

can you imagine that phone call. like genuinely. how am i supposed to continue living my normal life knowing this happened. people who loooove talking about punching nazis, taKE FUCKING NOTES

this is my favorite Meyer Lansky story.

my second favorite Meyer Lansky story is about the time, many years later, that he was at a meeting of mafia heads and one of them started bragging about how his son was following him into the family business.

Meyer Lansky said “That’s nice. My son works for NASA.”

If you see your USA mutual looking at the news and then producing a burger from their pocket and eating it, that can mean nothing good. This is the »emergency burger« used to strengthen oneself in times of dire need, and resorting to it is an unambiguous sign of great distress

Real and true

No joke this vine has a better understanding of transmisogyny than 40% of this website

"It doesn't have to be like this. We could have it so much better"

Calligraffiti in Chicago, Illinois

Jay’s rizz in It Follows is insane like this girl has an STD that is actively hunting her down and will do the same to whomever she sleeps with and she still has all these guys (who know about this thing) trying to sleep with her

TV Appreciation Week '24 Day 6 : favourite miniseries | THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE

why are so many automatic soap dispensers so shy

come on, beloved… You know i am here….