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creeper vs zombie

@snailboygirlrat / snailboygirlrat.tumblr.com

About Me on pinned [Banner description: A pair of hissing roaches on colorful building blocks. End ID. PFP description: A yellow smiley face balloon, with blood dripping onto it. End ID.]
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callizinc

Y'all think the fantasy high universe has fantasy tumblr lol

(inspired by @orions-garden who had this idea first !)

🐀 stealthcheck reblogged steelwindstrike

steelwindstrike Follow

you guys remember that trend from last spring where everyone was posting these random videos and pictures and saying there was a tabaxi woman in there LMAO What the fuck was that 😂 it was like a worse version of The Gown thing from years ago

steelwindstrike

#LMAOOOO I FORGOT ABOUT THAT #wasnt that a marketing scheme for that one teen band #im pretty sure it was

LMAO WAS IT? i wouldnt be surprised LOL

🐴 princessthehorse Follow

THERE WAS LITERALLY A TABAXI IN ALL OF THOSE VIDEOS. THEY WERE LIKE REALLY SCARY VIDEOS. WHAT WAS EVERYONE ON ABOUT. WHAT FERNS WERE Y'ALL FUCKING ON

🔮 conjurdivination Follow

OP, I understand your confusion but that was very much a real event! Turns out that tabaxi was the Shadow Cat, the familiar of the Nightmare King who was actually an ancient goddess of Sylvaire who was transubstantiated into a disease. She could only be seen by people who had her disease, which was transmitted through various bodily fluids. The Court of Stars has also been putting out statements lately saying that they and other members of the Fallinel government worked with the Shadow Cat, but had nothing to do with her plot of trying to bring back the Nightmare King, since she apparently worked with them as well.

steelwindstrike

steelwindstrike

Was it still those fucking kids who did all that though

🐀 stealthcheck

it was those fucking kids

73,127 notes

🦇 nightmarekwing reblogged powerofsol

🦇 nightmarekwing

was just waiting for a meeting with my banker and i watch two teenagers show up and one puts a gun to his head and the other grabs his balls. I'm so done with adventurers bro, how the fuck do people allow this shit

🦇 nightmarekwing

One of the teenagers is the archdevil of the bottomless pit. i swear to god i'm gonna die and even Hell is gonna be a piece of shit because of adventurers

☀️ powerofsol Follow

Did you not do anything to try and help your banker?????

🦇 nightmarekwing

no why would i help a banker

11,928 notes

🧚‍♀️ tiredaasimar

I have insider information on the Central Solesian Area Polycule

5,872 notes

🔍 detectiveagent5353 reblogged alwayshappyhour

❤️ 123fantasydestiel Follow

I cannot BELIEVE that there are FELLOW STUDENTS here at Aguefort who are SERIOUSLY considering voting for Kristen Applebees for class president. Are you out of your mind? Kipperlilly Copperkettle is actually trying to campaign to make the school better for all of us when we've all seen firsthand how messed up everything is. She's actually trying to make it fair for us students, and what does Kristen want to do? Nothing! She has literally ZERO campaign promises that mean ANYTHING for the school and the only things she talks about are steelworkers of all things and a thing NOBODY knows. NOBODY KNOWS WHAT FETTY WAP IS! I looked it up and looked through every book in the library! THOSE WORDS HAVE NEVER BEEN SAID BEFORE! NEVER!

All I'm saying is if this school starts to go downhill because you all thought it was funnier to vote for the cleric who killed her god TWICE than the regular student who's ACTUALLY trying to make the school better, you all better realize that it's your fault.

🌃 alwayshappyhour

sounds like someone's salty they can't do a shrimp jump

🔍 detectiveagent5353

256.927.723.142

1,283 notes

🐗 recklessattakk

my hungry ass could never be a cleric

3,992 notes

boggyandmoggy reblogged thistleficer

🐦 infernobirds Follow

reblog to cast healing word on the person you rbed this from

23,828 notes

burntownsgetvans reblogged falloutboimaniac

🐉 burntownsgetvans

does anyone know what's going on with fig and the cig figs? i've been waiting for their new album for a while but their social media account has been radio silent, like fig and gorgug are still posting on their personal accounts but nothing about the band :(. they said a new album would be coming out soon last april, i'm just kind of sad and confused i guess

🌹 falloutboimaniac Follow

that's really rough man yeah. i don't know what's going on with them either, but i hope they'll end up releasing something soon for you. but if you wanna listen to something that's like fig and the cig figs, maybe you'd like my clerical gnomance? they've been a total breakout hit all over the radio where i'm from lately and they are sooo good lol

🐉 burntownsgetvans

well, okay, i'll give it a shot i guess, thanks for the recommendation :)

🐉 burntownsgetvans

@falloutboimaniac Listen up chucklefuck go FUCK yourself. I'm so fucking TIRED of people like you who are always trying to replace the cig figs and discredit their success and for WHAT reason? I'm so done, I'm so fucking done, I don't wanna FUCKING HEAR IT AND YOU'VE PISSED ME THE FUCK OFF. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS AND LISTEN TO YOUR OWN SHITTY MUSIC? ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FUCKING Ddid anyone see that red thing just now

823 notes

🌸 greatgnomishbaker

she kalvaxus on my emperor until i red waste

2,801 notes

lycanstropy reblogged 123fantasydestiell

🧑 123fantasydestiell Follow

Getting really annoyed by all the posts going around joking about Kalvaxus and the Nightmare King. Both of them were EXTREMELY serious and REAL entities that caused SO much destruction in the very real world, and unless you were harmed by them you should NOT be joking about them like that, that is SO gross. My great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great cousin four times removed was KILLED by Kalvaxus and it is so shitty to have to open the dashboard every day to see posts like this.

🕷️ minceraftshreeper Follow

sure but kalvaxus has literally been dead for like 2 years or something 😭. like the fact that those kids killed kalvaxus very much did make national and probably international news did you somehow miss that. and the guy was a total clown be fr it'd be crazy not to joke about him

🧑 123fantasydestiell

Did you not read my entire post? I don't care if you think Kalvaxus was a "clown" or not or that he's already dead, HE KILLED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE!!!!! You cannot be making posts JOKING About him like that!!!!!!!!!!

🐈 lycanstropy

I went on a field trip to Hell in my warlock class the other day and a bunch of pirates turned Kalvaxus into a ship and tattooed his ass

9,378 notes

🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness

I fucking hate public school dude a plane almost crashed into my house at midnight and turns out it's because of a fucking club at the school and then i GO to school and i can barely even get into my bard class because everyone's lining up around that fucking pirate's kid and the principal is a fucking kid because this school is such a wreck. And can anyone please tell me why the same kid is now in every single club i am also in???? every time i make eye contact with him in one of my clubs he runs away. didn't he and the pirate kid and their party kill like 6 staff members?????????? AND WHY IS THERE A COP IN THE HALLWAYS??????????????????????

54 notes

🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness reblogged rayofdownwiththesickness

🕷️ minceraftshreeper Follow

Imagine complaining about students killing people when you literally go to an adventuring school 😂

🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness

i'd rather you say it to my face than vague me on the dashboard you know

🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness

I have been hexblade cursed

774 notes

👨‍💻 12345fantasydestiel

Has Aguefort collectively forgotten about the fact that a giant spider appeared on campus a few months ago and started terrorizing people? I'm starting to understand why so many people think so negatively of Aguefort now. I was literally there and watched it happen and then no one seemed to bring it up ever again. No teachers decided to address it or anything. We're lucky it didn't kill anyone, and, actually, now I'm remembering, wasn't Kristen Applebees there? I swear to Galicaea she was there. Is that why nothing came of it, cause her party has like 4 parents on the school staff? This place is a joke.

11 notes

infaethable reblogged alwayshappyhour

🌃 alwayshappyhour

she nightmare on my king until i cassandra

1,287 notes

infaethable reblogged alwayshappyhour

🌃 alwayshappyhour

she nightmare on my king until i cassandra

1,287 notes

infaethable reblogged alwayshappyhour

🌃 alwayshappyhour

she nightmare on my king until i cassandra

1,287 notes

infaethable reblogged alwayshappyhour

🌃 alwayshappyhour

she nightmare on my king until i cassandra

1,287 notes

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An entity found alone in the Far Plane. The entity seems to do nothing in its environment except exist. Its relationship with the plant-like organisms that grow around it is currently unknown.

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3amsnow

[ID: digital art of a white quadrupedal creature with big, shining blue eyes, a long body, snout, and legs, and a pink tinged snout and legs, lying in a white bathtub full of greenery and pink flowers in a large room full of greenery and pink flowers, with shower drains on the floor, and long oval shaped windows on the blue tile walls behind the bathtub, through which yellow light is shining, the only light in the room, casting sunbeams. end ID]

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nyancrimew

i don't believe the mailman exists, it HAS to be our parents who bring us packages and letters there's no way for one guy to do all that

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🦇 carmilla-did-nothing-wrong Follow

just because images of crucifixes cant physically harm us doesnt mean they arent still triggering, tag your crucifix pix j*sus chr*st

     silverstaked-deactivated2023100

oh? little bloodsuckers afraid of a tiny cross?

🦇 carmilla-did-nothing-wrong Follow

literally what the fuck is your problem?

fangs4fags Follow

of course its a fucking hunter

🧛‍♀️ cadaverouscathy Follow

Why are there still hunters on this site?? @staff

skellingtom Follow

silverstaked has literally sent my friend exorcisms before. nothing strong enough to send them back to hell but theyve been weakened for days because of it. block and report.

🐺 howlin4u Follow

adding these tags from @vamplovingwolf theyre targeting werewolves too i guess

👻 tombfoolery Follow

we did it ghouls

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This post is a reminder to all intergalactic citizens but especially those within the fixed universe to please be extremely critical of any “cute” videos that involve humans (bipedal hominid organisms from Earth, Milky Way, Laniakea)

I have noticed a significant uptick in viral content containing this species (probably thanks to Xarqrets Kain’s recent “Universe’s Cutest Aliens: Sol” series 🙄) and I am very concerned with how humans are treated to produce such content. We all love seeing cute human videos, so let’s break down how we can ensure the content we’re consuming is ethical!

Red Flag Human videos to watch out for:

ANY video featuring a human on a planet other than their native home of Earth.

  • These videos are particularly concerning considering the increasingly pervasive (and highly illegal) human pet trade. Humans are a remarkably adaptable species, but even those who appear well-adjusted to life on another planet are in great danger. Exposure to novel pathogens in humans are not well-studied and any human placed in a new environment could be at risk of death or corruption. These creatures are also highly gregarious and removal from their established social group on Earth can be detrimental to health and well-being. Responsible scientists will only remove humans from their planet as a last resort.

Be cautious of videos that show humans inside their homes

  • Access inside human domiciles is highly restricted to legitimate research studies only, and bootleg streams from illegally placed monitoring systems are highly unethical. If you are curious about how humans behave in their homes, please seek out streams from accredited research organizations that have collected footage by methods undetectable to humans!

Beware of content that shows captive humans engaged in dangerous situations

  •  Humans are illegal to own for many reasons, but one of the most crucial is that this species has a dangerous tendency to get into things they should not. Humans are pathologically curious, and captive humans (especially bored ones) WILL find the most dangerous place in their environment to “explore”. I recently saw a video circulating of someone’s pet human approaching a field of Termakhan, solely because it wanted to get a better look at them. I shouldn’t have to tell you how dangerous that situation was.

This one should really be a no-brainer by now but please do NOT share videos where humans are curled into a ball on the ground or producing excessively intense acoustic waves. These are signs of extreme distress in humans!!

  •  The unfortunate reality of most encounters with humans (by non-trained individuals) is that they are highly frightening to the humans involved. That “adorable” video of a human vibrating the air molecules around it to an extraordinary degree when touched is actually an example of a behavior that is now well documented as an extreme stress response called “screaming”. Just because humans display fear in a way we don’t immediately recognize does not mean they’re not distressed by contact with us.

There is plenty of safe and ethical human content you can find if you look, and there is really no reason to support videos that put this amazing species at risk! Instead, seek out videos of adorable humans exhibiting normal behavior in their natural habitat on their planet- walking along coastlines, interacting with other species’ on their planet, playing with their young (so cute!), sharing meals with one another, and so on. Do your part to limit the human pet trade and avoid media that endangers or distresses these creatures just to make a “cute” video!

I just want to add one minor caveat about the “scream” stress response, because I can already hear the crowds of angry people ready to counter it:

Yes, humans also have a pleasure response that creates extreme air vibrations around them, and also also have a recreational form of vibrating the air around themselves on purpose. And yes, if you’re not trained in recognizing the differences between “screaming” and “laughing” and “singing”, they can be difficult to tell apart.

But that’s exactly why you need to check in with someone who is trained, and can tell you whether this human is happy, upset, or just having fun!

(It should also be noted that sometimes humans curl up to rest and not as a stress response. Watch for whether their muscles are tensed or relaxed! It’s not a sure means of differentiating, but it’s a good starting point.)

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👻 corpsecourse Follow

dni if you support relationships between vampires and the vampire they sired. i am so serious, i dont care what your justification is, that is an unforgivable power imbalance. its almost as bad as vampire human relationships (and if you support that i hope you get a splinter in the heart)

🧛‍♀️ vampbites Follow

op what the fuck is your problem? more maggots in your brain than usual? go out into the real underworld and touch some graveyard dirt. i know at least 7 vampires who are in happy healthy relationships with the vampire who sired them. me included! this may shock you but we started dating when i was human and she was a vamp!

👻 corpsecourse Follow

i hate to tell you this but you're in a toxic relationship and i sincerely hope youre able to get out.

🧛‍♀️ vampbites Follow

HELLO???????

🦇 battybrained Follow

i keep seeing people saying this shit and honestly i think it stems from the infantalization of humans. humans are capable of making decisions for themselves. do some vampires abuse their powers over humans? of course! but you cant assume that every single human vampire relationship (or sire and sired relationship for that matter) is some unhealthy power imbalance, especially when you dont even know them!!!

fangs4fags Follow

i think op is forgetting that humans can be just as harmful to vampires as they can be to humans. dont tell me you completely just forgot about the existence of vampire slayers

🧛‍♂️ coffincreeper Follow

next thing you know op is gonna be saying that a hundred year age gap between fully fledged vampires is problematic

👻 corpsecourse Follow

it literally is. i dont care if you are a 1000 years old vampire, if your significant other is 100 years older than you they have more life experience than you. god you guys are stupid why dont you all step into a sunbeam

🩸 f33d3r Follow

hey guys i just went to ops account and their pinned post was about how they dont consider werewolves part of the monster community cuz theyre not undead. just block and move on it is NOT worth it

🐺vamplovingwolf Follow

isnt it funny how whenever theres some rancid discourse like this its always made by coffinscrews

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aita-blorbos
Anonymous asked:

I (33m) stalked my coworker (34m). I had recently found out that my predecessor had been murdered and hidden in tunnels under the workplace. in my paranoia I believed one of my coworkers must’ve done the deed. I followed him home and took pictures of his house. My coworkers ended up holding an intervention for me, and my boss granted me the cctv footage of the week she died, but it just left me with more and more questions. Someone is still lying to me and I think I know who, I just need to proof.

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aita-blorbos
Anonymous asked:

AITA for trapping myself in a time loop?

Hi, so I (40M) recently put myself in a time loop in order to defeat a cosmic superbeing capable of destroying my planet, if not my entire dimension. My mentor (???F) warned me about using this type of power, but I- oh shit he's going to kill me--

AITA for trapping myself in a time loop?

As I was saying, my mentor warned me about using this type of power, but I frankly had no other option. This was the only way to trap this superbeing without harming any innocents in the damage. It could- FUCK there's the giant fist, goddamnit--

AITA for trapping myself in a time loop?

It could have irreversible consequences both personally and physically, but I recently learned that it isn't always about me. This is for the greater--

AITA for trapping myself in a time loop?

Sorry, that time I was incinerated. Didn't have much reaction time. This is for the greater goo--

AITA for trapping myself in a time loop?

Okay that time I just fell asleep. I've kinda been losing track of how many loops I'm in. This is about....the 15,000th? Anyway, AITA for trapping myself in a- OH GOD NOT THE SPIKES--

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aita-blorbos
Anonymous asked:

AITA for eating a guy?

oki so me (???NB) (she/him) and my girlfriend (???NB) (he/they) where like, literally just chillin at the park right. so this fucking guy was with his girlfriend also and they started feedin the ducks, so my wonderful very helpful girlfriend (we're dating btw isnt that cool) told him that he shouldnt be doing so! bread is very bad for ducks! they also told him to keep away from elevators, although it wasnt very likely that he could avoid death in the following weeks. this VERY HELPFUL advice was apparently "rude" and "fucked up" and "who just says that to people" and "is that a threat??", and the guy started INSULTING and (verbally) ATTACKING my wonderful amazing girlfriend. i (as his girlfriend) could NOT just let that happen, so obviously i "attacked back". past the heat of the argument, i can admit that eating his lung in front of his girlfriend was maybe a little overboard. but he has two anyways so he'll be fine. kinda greedy if you think about it

but the enforcers yall have around apparently agree w/ the guy because i gave him "life altering injury and trauma" or something like that. medical lingo. my girlfriend said that i should be nicer to the people i eat though, like that the blood flow was like painfool n stuff, so now im kinda worried about it. AITA?

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aita-blorbos
Anonymous asked:

AITA for faking my death?

About two years ago, I (25M) and a childhood friend (25M) met again through work after years of not seeing each other after a situation I'd rather not disclose had me move away to another country. My friend confessed that he'd gotten into my line of work out of a desire to meet me again. My life turned hectic as he outperformed me every time we crossed paths, though he did get me out of a damning situation, which I am highly grateful for. The last time we'd met, it inspired me to seriously reconsider my work ethic and personal outlook on life, and I decided to leave all I knew behind in order to better myself as a person entirely. In doing so, I left a letter with something along the lines of "OP chooses death," which I intended it to be taken in a more poetic death of my person than a physical one, though I admit was a poor choice of words, looking back.

When I returned, my friend had apparently found himself in a particularly dangerous situation. As I wanted to return the favor for what he'd done for me back then, I decided to meet him and offer him help. However, in lieu of a warm welcome or anything of the sort, he instead turned extremely irate and told me my reasons for leaving were selfish, and that it would've been better if I had stayed dead. I laughed it off at the time as I knew he was stressed enough already, but I felt it was unfair for him to say such things when he was the reason I left to get better in the first place.

AITA for leaving?

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aita-blorbos

AITA for caring about my perfect record (and that of my protégée)?

So loads of people seem to think I'm an awful person for this, but I (65?M) am a Prosecutor, and a very good one. I have never received even so much as a mark on my record, or at least I hadn't until roughly 15 years ago (December 2001).

See, I used to have this rival (35?M), we'll call him G. G was a Defense Attorney, and during one of our cases, he proved that some of the evidence I presented was dodgy. I still won the case in the end, but the judge couldn't overlook my "misconduct" and marked it on my record. I was understandably upset, and honestly quite angry at G by this point -- he had ruined my record!

Luckily for me, just as G was leaving the courthouse, an earthquake struck. G was in the elevator at the time, and it got stuck.

Now at this point I should tell you that G was not alone. In the elevator with him were his son M (then 9, now 24M) and a court bailiff who we'll call Y (then 37, now 52M).

You can imagine my surprise when, upon finding the elevator, a bullet shot out through the window and lodged itself in my shoulder! I have recently learned that this was the fault of M, he had thrown Y's dropped gun in order to stop Y attacking G, and then passed out due to lack of oxygen. By the time the elevator doors opened, Y and G had passed out, too

Seeing Y's gun laying on the floor, I suddenly realised what I had to do. I picked the gun up off the floor, and shot G dead. I then feigned shock at the scene, raising the alarm.

Y was accused of the crime, since his gun was the one used, but the court did not charge him as he plead temporary insanity on instruction from his Attorney. M believed he killed his father, still did until fairly recently. He also developed an irrational fear of elevators and earthquakes as a result, which I believe merely speaks to a weak mind but that's none of my concern.

Following G's demise, I took young M under my wing. He wanted to follow in his father's footsteps and become a Defense Attorney, a delusion I swifty put a stop to, instead persuading him to become a Prosecutor like myself, training him to be the best, to fight for a conviction no matter what.

However, recently a "childhood friend" came back into his life. As a Defense Attorney. And he began to try to make M fight for the truth -- as if truth is more important than a clean record! This upstart Attorney also won several cases against M, destroying his record. And M even seemed to be beginning to fall for his "friend"'s trickery!

Naturally I had to put a stop to this, and so I had a letter written to M pretending to be the Attorney who defended Y all those years ago, R (48M), asking M to meet him at a local lake. I then called up R, asking him to go to the location (but earlier than M) and had Y shoot him and throw his body in the lake. Next, I made Y dress up as him, and shoot over M's shoulder and jump into the water (I instructed Y to take M on a boat ride to the middle of the lake). From the shore, this made it look as though M had shot Y (it was a misty night, and roughly midnight). M made it even easier to frame him as, in his shock, he picked up the dropped gun, meaning that when police found him, his fingerprints were all over the weapon. My plan was perfect, as anything by any member of my family should be.

But I failed to account for the amateur Attorney M used to call a friend. He decided to defend M. I thought this would be no big deal, he hasn't even been practicing law for a year yet! But he is thorough, and he can bluff his way through things. He ended up revealing everything, even solving the murder of G right before the Statute of Limitations ran out!! And I have now been charged with murder. All I ever wanted was to protect my record, I think it was all justified. Yeah, yeah, I killed M's father on Christmas Eve so now he has December-related trauma, but this is about me!

TL;DR: AITA for straight up murdering my rival in cold blood, taking his orphaned child under my wing, and then trying to frame said kid for another murder 15 years later? I did it to protect my perfect record, I think I'm justified :(((

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