when ethel cain said “i tried to be good am i no good am i no good am i no good” which started with her self-loathing after being abused by her father and neil perry said “i was good. i was really good” and then he killed himself because he knew that he would never be good enough for his father

by Alice White

this made me cry so now i need everyone to see it

On Seatbelts and Sunsets - Hanif Abdurraqib

100 notes and i’ll do a face reveal 😔🫵🏼

a promise is a promise 😘

Sometimes, it’s hard to interact with Nico. Even Hazel has to admit that. No, it’s not his father, no, it’s not how he chants the names of the dead, well at least not for Hazel, no. It’s how the souls cling on to him, like he is the anchor in the wild sea. When he laughs, sweet as nectar, it is like you can hear the joy of the spirits with him, as if they’ve heard that they can return just one more time, to apologize, to say their goodbyes, to say “it’s not your fault” and “I love you” When he sobs, you hear the wails of the souls in the Lethe, alone, forgotten. You can feel the pain of the tormented, the Acheron spilling from his mouth. His rage is unkempt, rage like the souls in Punishment, rage like Achilles who sits by the Styx, rage of the many souls who never got a life they truly lived. It’s not his fault. You know that. Hazel knows that. Everyone does. But when he speaks, and his voice mixes like wine with the voices of the ones you loved, the ones you cherished, you have to turn away. No wonder the boy stopped speaking. What torture would it be, to hear his sister when he spoke? Or his mother when he cried? How painful.

Ice cream date 🤍

i thought this quiz was really cool so i’m starting a tag game :3

this uquiz! ⬆️

npt: @fakestziv@a-wondering-thought@sleepy-vix@jeanosthecatperson@annotated-catastrophe@arson-the-living-crime@imnotpayingforurtherapy@zinepunk@cloroxcasserole@secondbutonenothird@carrotsinnovember@maximum-tragedy anyone else who wants to join

(as always if you weren’t tagged and you want to be let me know and if you were tagged and don’t want to be also let me know)

i feel so called out

@binvibin @secondbutonenothird @maximum-tragedy @justafanbutcurious @hammyham-o-o @illarian-rambling @amandacanwrite

@maximum-tragedy @good-oldfashioned-lover-girl

thanks for the tag !

ok well this is a little painful to read…

npt @emmamcmath @discoveredreality @the-lionsheart  @margaret-the-duck @thedvilsinthedetails @justafanbutcurious @veo-laldez @vintagetee13 @no-names-work @her-midas-touch @jamespotterbbg @miseryoforpheus and anyone else <3

thanks for the tag @good-oldfashioned-lover-girl

…ahjesusfuckyouuu (/j but it is remarkably accurate)

Open tag :)

adding the moodboard cuz omg

open tags

ill be picking him up gently between my hands and never letting him go 🤲

Wow

{Juansen Dizon, I Am The Architect of My Own Destruction page 24/ Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 6: 1955-1966/ Alice Hoffman, The Red Garden/ Anaïs Nin, from The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 5: 1947-1955/ Haruki Murakami: Norwegian Wood, page 276/ Michael Ondaatje/ Catherynne M. Valente, The Orphan's Tales: In the Night Garden/ D.H. Lawrence, from The Complete Works; The Plumbed Serpent/ Jean-Paul Sartre, from No Exit/ Alice Notley, from In The Pines: Poems; "In The Pines,"}

does drowning make you appreciate the world more? it has to, it has to, it's so beautiful underwater, and people usually don't have a chance to notice it. it happens, it happens.

you can submerge yourself, you can choose it, you can entangle yourself in some disgusting seaweed, you can, you can, it's your decision, you choose it. 

so what if there were wasps flying on the surface, you did not want to get stung, you had to run away, you had to, but it was still your decision.

the seaweed will pull you down, pull you into the whirlpool, and you will sink to the bottom, sink deeper and appreciate the beauty, appreciate.

but you know, this seaweed, this sea grass, this sea lettuce, it is stretchy, maybe sometimes it will allow you to go out onto the pier, take a breath and ignore the depth, ignore.

but remember that this abomination stretches and shrinks and shrinks, and sometimes as soon as you dip your bound ankle into the water, it will drag you down and you will sink to the bottom, sink.

and you will no longer breathe, you will not, but you will still exist and appreciate the beauty, appreciate. and yes, you can try harder, try harder, fight, train, practice, you can.

but sometimes you want someone to just pull you up, to untie this sick knot, even though you know it can tie itself again, to untie it, to give you a chance.

and sometimes someone does and you are too grateful.

from the bottom of your heart you would like to leave it all behind, move to the mountains and never think about the sea again, but it's not that simple, it's not.

you'll always have to be a little more careful, but maybe someone will help you, maybe you'll learn to help yourself, maybe you'll rest a little and then you'll train and practice and you’ll be fine, you’ll be.

Morgan Nikola-Wren

Frank O'Hara

Allow people to like you, to enjoy your company, to want to be your friend. Allow them to compliment you, allow others to think you're cool and funny even if you think you're not. It is not up to you to tell others how to feel, and remember that people might see the positive things in you and qualities that you have been failing to see while being too self-critical. Allow yourself to be liked by other people, even when you don't see why they should. Don't self-isolate because you think you are not good enough for other people.

i was an isolated child

last words of a shooting star - mitski / interlude - jeremy lipking / beast monster thing (love isn't love enough) - car seat headrest / untitled - franz wright / twilight: new moon (2009) / teen idle - marina and the diamonds / my year of rest and relaxation - ottessa moshfegh / morning sun - edward hopper / look who's inside again - bo burnham / a girl ago - lucie brock-broido