So I took months to update the fic you nearly thought I gave up on it?
Fear not. This is going to be finished sooner or later. It’s a promise.
In the meantime, have some Dandelion and Jaskier banter with a sprinkle of sexual tension.
Well, guess who’s back?
Me. Sort of. Not really. Anyway, have some Geralt x Geralt action in this new chapter.
Oh Dandelion, what a mess you got yourself into…
Did anyone ask for Gerlion in a queer platonic relationship at Corvo Bianco?? No? Ok. Just me. ____________
Dandelion huffed and squinted at his book. The words were out of focus and his head was beginning to ache from straining his eyes. He’d left his glasses upstairs in Geralt’s room. They’d fallen asleep together last night having stayed up too late reminiscing about their adventures from many moons ago. It had been nice to have the company. They didn’t share a bed that often these days. There was no longer any excuse. They had money and they had space and Corvo Bianco was kept warm even in the mild Toussiant winters by the fireplaces in both their rooms.
Geralt rarely took contracts anymore. He helped nearby wine merchants when they ran into monster problems but only if they sought him out. Most of time was spent with Roach in the picturesque countryside of Toussiant or visiting Yennefer and Ciri when the mood struck him. Dandelion joined Geralt for picnics in the fields and every few years they would venture further north to meet up with Eskel and Lambert. It wasn’t as far as Kaer Morhen. Dandelion couldn’t make it up the mountain anymore and the keep was no longer habitable even for the witchers.
Time was a cruel queen.
“Geralt!” He called out for his friend. He could go upstairs himself but his knees were aching and he was comfortable in his arm chair by the window.
Geralt was probably in the stables with Roach. He hadn’t seen the pair ride out down the path so Geralt would hear him. His keen witchers senses had to count for something.
“Geralt I need my glasses!” He called louder and pouted. He looked up at the ceiling with a heavy sigh.
“You’re more trouble than you’re worth, poet.” Geralt smirked as he pushed open the front door. “I just had a raven from Yen. She’s visiting with Ciri next week.”
“Oh?” Dandelion hummed and tilted his head. “That’ll be nice. Gods, How old is she now? I lose track.”
“Ciri?” Geralt scowled. “I don’t know. How are old are you?”
Dandelion stuck his tongue out as he tried to count back. A few decades ago he’d finally had to admit that he wasn’t entirely human. They’d suspected he might have elven blood for years but after all his classmates from Oxenfurt were long dead and he barely had a grey hair to show for it, he’d finally asked Yennefer to confirm the truth of the matter.
“Umm….” Dandelion pulled on one of his curls. They were finally beginning to fade to a snowy white and his hair certainly wasn’t as thick as it had been but he kept it long. The habit of playing with his hair was a hard one to beat, and soon he would match Geralt in both length and colour.
“Ciri can’t keep track either. Apparently time travel makes it a mess.” Geralt squatted down next to him and pulled Dandelion’s fingers from his hair. “It doesn’t matter.”
Dandelion snorted. “I’m old, Geralt!” He whined. “Hell, I can hardly get on my horse anymore, I can’t read properly and I’m getting wrinkles!”
Geralt brushed a thumb across his cheek. “You look fine, Dandelion. Stop moaning.”
Dandelion just huffed and crossed his arms. “Do me a favour, old friend, and get my glasses? I left them in your room.”
Geralt stood up and rolled his eyes. “Fine, but you’ll read to me?”
Dandelion laughed and he pulled off his hat, letting it drop into his lap so he could run his fingers through his hair. “Oh if you insist, my dear witcher.”
Geralt gave him a small smile and nodded. “I do.”
“Grab my lute from my room whilst you’re up there?” Dandelion called as Geralt started to make his way up the stairs.
“Did you want a dance whilst you’re at it?” Geralt yelled back.
Dandelion giggled at the mental image of his witcher dancing for him. “Well, now that you mention it!”
“Fuck off, Dandelion.”
Dandelion grinned and let his head fall back against his chair as he sighed dramatically. After so many years of his youth wasted on keeping up appearances as the unparalleled lover of all, Dandelion the bard and master of seduction, he was finally free. He was Dandelion, best friend and life partner to one Geralt of Rivia. They had their house and their life together. There were no expectations of grand romances or marriage or sex. It was just Dandelion and Geralt in their vineyard and that was everything Dandelion had ever truly wanted. _______ Tag list: @abluescarfonwaston @artistsfuneral @slythnerd @elliestormfound @moonysourenza @victorieschild @hailhailsatan @wherethewordsare @havenoffandoms @bitchy-witchy-post-mortem (Reminder you can be added/removed at anytime!)
Send your Geraskier or Gerlion prompts over. I shall do my best <3
Hellloooo could I possibly request some Gerlion? Maybe Dandelion braiding or brushing Geralt's hair? Something soft ☺️
I took your idea and ran with it <3
***
“Sit still, don’t move.”
Geralt groaned.
“Don’t you groan at me. If you hadn’t been so neglectful, you wouldn’t be finding yourself in so embarrassing a mess.”
Geralt groaned, again. And how could he not, when he was seated at the edge of the bed, palms pressed to his face, a comb stuck in his hair? How or when it happened, he could hardly recall. He had a drink, or two, or three. He was so knocked out he fell flat on the mattress the night before.
When he woke up, the comb was there. And it was stubbornly irremovable.
"Remind me again,” said Dandelion, “How did the comb magically climb onto your head?”
His tone expressed mock, his gentle fingers concern, softly untangling strand by strand, trying to unravel the mess Geralt had unknowingly put himself into.
“I don’t recall much of last night.”
“Were you alone?”
“Had a drink with the barmaid.”
“Were you intoxicated?”
“Wasted.”
“I take it you were so out of it you couldn’t tell apart the lady from her comb. Now that would explain the entangling.”
Geralt huffed. “Funny. Are you done?”
“Not even close. I hate to break it to you, dear friend, but yours is a battle long lost. I say let me bring my dagger and set the poor thing free. It suffered enough snoring for one night.”
Geralt jolted in his seat, and glared daggers back at him.
“You’re not cutting it.”
“Why not?” said Dandelion, “Grew fond of your comb? Clearly, it has gotten into your head.”
Geralt painfully rolled his eyes.
“Work your magic fingers,” he said, “If you can tune a delicate lute, you can certainly unknot a comb out of my hair.”
“Are you comparing your head to a lute?”
“I suppose so.”
“Surely, they’re both hollow in their consistency,” said Dandelion, “Now, say oh.”
“Say wha - OH FUCK!”
With a tug, Dandelion had plucked the comb out of the nest with force, resulting in a few strands to follow. Geralt clutched the spot with gritted teeth and swallowed back a pained moan. Dandelion must have noticed, since his hands were quick to return to his hair, soft fingers soothingly rubbing some sort of oil into it. Whatever he was doing, it helped appease the pain.
Dandelion leaned over to peek at him with a grin.
“Are we crying?”
“You could have warned me.”
“Now, where’s the fun in that?”
“You’re a terrible friend.”
“Take that back or you shall receive no special after-care treatment.”
A pause.
“You’re a friend.”
Dandelion snorted.
“I believe I can work with that.”
Soon enough, Geralt’s earlier groans turned into soft purrs under the soothing effect of Dandelion’s massaging fingers. Once the oil was applied, the comb returned to his scalp and this time, it flowed through his strands with ease.
“By the way, what happened to the barmaid?”
“The barmaid?”
“Yes, the barmaid.”
Geralt rubbed his forehead trying to piece his memory back together. There were flashbacks of him following her upstairs, of her pulling him into bed, of him stripping her naked, and -
accidentally calling her Dandelion.
“I don’t recall.”
“Well, stay clear of her path,” he said, “Unless you want to wind up with a comb stuck up your arse next time.”
“You wouldn’t want to help me with that one.”
Dandelion chuckled.
“Oh, I would.”
Be it geraskier, gerlion, or a crossover between the two, I’m all ears!
The new update took me an eternity and I apologize. Between mood drops, writer blocks, and stressful finals, it’s tough to keep myself entertained enough to pull these off (and it demands a certain type of mood to put together all the humorous bickering). But somehow, somehow, I regenerated enough to push through the final chapters! (Probably four more to go)
Anyway, enjoy!
Summary:
Geralt and Dandelion come across two unconscious bodies nearby their camp.
Dopplers? Impersonators? Lookalikes? Worse.
It involves portals, witches and them from another universe.
Or if you’re newly on board:
Wonder what he’s on about
It’s finally up. I know I promised it two days ago, but I’m struggling to finish things at the moment (especially writing), so I hope you’ll forgive me.
Sunshine caressed his features with concentrated warmth, waking Geralt up from the deepest sleep he had had in what felt like an eternity. Heavy eyelids fluttered open to catch sight of the window curtains floating gently to the caress of the wind. Outside, the villagers had begun going about their day.
He stretched in utter laziness and patted the spot on the bed beside him. To his disappointment, he found it empty and cold. Jaskier must have gotten up a while ago, which was unusual, knowing how his bard delighted in a morning-after.
He slipped back inside his worn-out outfit, fixed his armor on top and considered taking it to the blacksmith if it were not for the lack of coin in his pocket. He ran a swift hand across his unruly hair then headed out of the room. He stopped at the threshold, watching the door across part open and his eyes darted upwards to catch an identical golden pair.
“Hm." His counterpart groaned, as if minutely contemplating stepping back inside and shutting the door close.
“Rough night?” teased Geralt, innocently referring to the mess that was his hair and the heavy bags of clear exhaustion hanging under his eyes. Though he was quick to notice he looked more on the radiant side – if that word could ever describe him in any existing universe.
The White Wolf winced and a dark frown traced his forehead out of clear offense. Confused yet uncaring, Geralt watched him step out of the room, shut the door behind him, and trudge downstairs.
Something about him was clearly amiss but Geralt did not bother to question it – did not care, really. Instead, he chose to follow suit and head downstairs for breakfast.
The inn’s tavern was quiet even though it was nearing mid-day. Most of the guests have had drunk themselves to unconsciousness the night before, which left only the innkeeper seated behind the counter, counting her scarce coin. She, too, nestled a drink with a strange mixture consisting of ingredients that had Geralt, regardless of the fair distance separating them, scrunch up his nose in pure disgust.
Anything to cure a hangover, he guessed.
He located Jaskier with delay – due to his abnormally quiet state – at the far corner of the tavern hunched over the table and glaring daggers at the lively man seated across from him. It was Dandelion. He was holding his head up higher than usual, the grin at the corner of his lips tugged further, and the air about him was obnoxiously prideful. One glance was all Geralt needed to tell he had just won whatever debate the two were amidst.
“Cry me a river,” came his humorous laughter, “I, for one, slept like a baby reared against its mother’s breast. Perhaps you would have complained less if you had had half so good a pounding, you poor boneless bag of misfortunes. Ah, speak of the devil! There come our favourite witchers.”
I installed a mod to switch out Triss for Dandelion and I love the result.
oh my god
OH MY GOD
Jaskier, pointing at Game!Geralt: My Geralt is better than yours.
Dandelion: Technically speaking he is my Geralt since he comes from my world.
Jaskier: Following your obviously flawed argumentation that would make my world's Geralt mine and we both know I don't claim your sloppy seconds.
Dandelion: You're just jealous because I was able to seduce him within days while you have spent your entire youth chasing after your teenage crush and got nothing out of it other than a soggy arse.
Jaskier: If my arse is soggy then so is yours, smartass.
Dandelion: That's a weak comeback, try harder next time.
Jaskier: Is that what your Geralt tells you in bed?
Dandelion: he tells me if life could give him one blessing it would be to take you off his hands.
Jaskier:
Jaskier: You.
Jaskier: Are.
Jaskier: So.
Jaskier: DEAD.
Meanwhile, in the back,
Show!Geralt: Did he just call me a sloppy second?
Game!Geralt: He just called you a sloppy second.
Chapter 10 of Four is a Crowd sneak peek:
Show!Geralt: Fuck, we did it.
Dandelion: YES, we did it!
Jaskier: They did it and I will make sure they regret it.
Game!Geralt:
Game!Geralt: Did what?
OMG I just read your four is a crowd fic and I hope you update sooooooon. I thought jaskier/game!geralt would be adorable but did NOT expect how fucking HOT show!geralt/dandelion would be!! I am so here for dominant jaskier/dandelion and bratty bottom geralt aggghh!! Honestly now that I see it, I think they're kind of perfect together? I love the dynamic with show!geralt dealing with a jaskier with some more edge that won't let him get away with his bullshit. (The hair pulling!!! Djdjejwhshsh)
I’m happy to hear you enjoyed the (smutty) read!
Jaskier/game!Geralt dynamic is amazing (the ship that started it all!) but Dandelion/show!Geralt took us all by surprise. They are just a perfect mess and nobody thinks they would initially ship them until bam! it slaps you in the face. (my personal experience)
Also, the fact that Dandelion can whoop show!Geralt’s ass without a hint of hesitation? And make him do things HIS way? (and pull his hair because he CAN? ps: show!Geralt secretly loves it) That makes it a new favorite dynamic of mine!
Concerning the updates, I’m very slow due to my studies but also because I’m trying to write some quality content (also considering following a plot because eventually the story has to end am i right) reason why I don’t have a precise update time. But I’m guessing the next update is sometimes next week, hopefully?
<3
thank you @zagubionywilk , you commissions are as fun as always!! :D
Chapters: 9/? Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Game Geralt/Show Jaskier, Show Geralt/Game Dandelion Characters: Show Jaskier - Character, Game Dandelion - Character, Show Geralt - Character, Game Geralt - Character Additional Tags: All 4 idiots meet each other, Dandelion and Jaskier constantly bitching at each other, Both Geralts are done with them, Both Geralts are also at each other's throat, Game Geralt and Jaskier develop a thing, Show Geralt and Dandelion hate them for it, all four travel together, Romance, Humor, Smut, Fluff, First Time, Making Love, Anal Sex, Light Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort, Brothel visit, m/f/m but not as important, Dandelion and The White Wolf are fucking idiots someone please tell them, more tags coming up
Summary:
Geralt and Dandelion come across two unconscious bodies nearby their camp.
Dopplers? Impersonators? Lookalikes? Worse.
It involves portals, witches and them from another universe.
A bit of a late share but chapter 9 is up! <3
