actually bizarre how many people on here struggle to understand the basic concept of "if you take it upon yourself to dig through somebody's private activity/likes to build a profile of their sexual desires which you then publicize to others and use to encourage harassment & social exclusion of that person, you are the sexual aggressor in this scenario"

Genuinely so many scenarios where people dig through peoples likes and following to try and figure out what they’re interested in sexually are just sexual harassment. going into great detail about what you have speculated someone may perhaps be into from the 48 hours straight you’ve spent surveilling their every move to try and find any trace of sexual behavior or interest is actual terrifying creep behavior and if it was put into context in almost any other situation that involved a group of people they see as humans 90% of these people would agree

okay universe, i need something really really good to happen please

I like him hes funny

@sillystringstar this lowkey reminded me of you

*cough*

he must be stopped

Did I ever tell you guys how I met a Karen on a cruise when I was 13, got yelled at by her and before I proceeded to make her regret her life choices in the span of 3 minutes on an elevator?

Okay so this was 11 years ago. 

I was 13 and I was on a cruise for my Cousin’s quinceanera (Royal Caribbean gave discounts for those)

So My cousin was doing some stuff related to the event and didn’t have time to get food, so She asked me, my sister and a Family friend who was my age to go get her some pizza from one of the lower floors.

So we moved from the pool deck to get on the elevator.

Now we didn’t see anyone coming, so naturally I pressed the Elevator close button. and just as it was half-way closed, this crazy woman JUMPS IN, causing the the Elevator doors to sputter and then open.

The older woman, (who was a clear Karen as defined by now) was hella pissed. She makes a nasty snide comment “Thanks for holding the door” Clearly bitter and spitting venom. She was ready to give me a tongue lashing.

Now my 13 year old brain wanted to say “Sorry, I didn’t see you.” or “You blindsided us” But I ended up saying.

“I’m Sorry, Im Blind.”

The Karen’s eyes went wide and her mouth closed. She looked at me, unsure of how to respond to that.

Normally this would be an obvious lie. But I was wearing Sunglasses and she couldn’t see my eyes. I also wasn’t looking directly at her.

So the elevator ride was silent.

My sister and My fam friend were doing their best not to laugh.

A family got on and got off the elevator over the course of the ride.

The woman does make another snide comment.

“Why didn’t you close the elevator on them?”

I look down, not at her.

“I learned not to touch anything” as sad as I could.

Her face goes back to confusion. She is starting to think.

‘Oh s***. I think I have been insulting a blind kid.’

Unfortunately, I realized that we were all heading to the same floor.

I knew I was screwed once we got off on the floor. So, I made a gamble.

When we arrived on the floor, the elevator announced the floor number.

I stuck my arm out, Waiting, Praying my sister would understand.

She knew what I was going for. She took my hand and led me out of the elevator and away from the mean Karen. 

The look on that woman’s face is something I treasure to this day.

This is peak toph energy

did everyone burst into applause at the end too lmao?

What exactly seems fake about this story? Is it fake or is it just told in a way that exaggerates the drama surrounding a completely probable event? 

Because the event that happened: three 13 year olds, one of which happens to be wearing sunglasses, get on an elevator and don’t see another woman trying to get on. She insults them and, panicking, the sunglasses-wearing girl says “I’m blind,” then decides to roll with her lie to avoid an increasingly awkward situation. Her sister picks up on a fairly obvious social cue to roll with the situation as well, and the woman then visibly felt uncomfortable for insulting who she thought was a blind girl.

It’s not an “obviously fake” story; it may or may not be true, but it could easily happen and was just told in a way that increases the drama and suspense. Because that’s what storytelling is: the ability to tell even generally mundate stories in an engaging and funny way. See: the John Mulaney Xanax story. Thinking it’s obviously fake indicates to me that you haven’t spent any amount of time around teenagers or around human beings in general, especially the types of people that do, in fact, insult others and make snide comments in public unprompted.

idk how long you’ve been on this site, but you get to spot them

-the storytelling style -the fact that everything in this person’s blog is set up to be a viral text post -the use of the “Karen” meme (still sexist btw) -the overly precocious 13 year old

it’s fake. fakeity fake fake fake.  idk why I have to explain this to you, random stranger, but those are a few of the reasons.  are you pals with OP?  

I can nearly guarantee you I’ve been on this site longer than you, friend, since there aren’t too many people still around that were here in 2011. And I’ve seen a lot of fake stories over the years, some more patently ridiculous than others. Like…oppa homeless style was a thing, man. Nothing tops that except maybe the socially anxious marathon runner or reverse burglar stories.

This isn’t one of them; it’s just worded in a ridiculous fashion (on purpose, for comedic effect, like most stories told for the purpose of entertainment). They’re using memes, terminology, and syntax in a way that’s typical of stand-up; it’s not particularly rocket science, and I’ve heard similar types of stories related to me by my friends that work in retail and with teenagers. The story is likely true, just exaggerated for comedic effect.

Whether or not it’s “objectively funny” is a different question, but when your goal is to tell a story in an entertaining way you use different language than you would if you were just…upset and relating that a woman harrassed you in an elevator and you panicked.

And you didn’t have to explain it to me; you had no obligation to respond to me. Considering how much condescension drips from your response you didn’t seem to feel like responding was worth your time in the first place, so I’m not sure why you actually did.

Also lol, no, I’m not “friends with the OP.” Not sure why you seem to think that comments on a post with 55,000+ notes are automatically going to be personal friends with the OP, but ok. 

not reading the rest of this stupid shit but I was here in 2010, have a nice day.

I talked to OP, she acknowledged her story is ableist, we worked it out, please fuck off

I run a sideblog about fake posts on Tumblr this is definitely fake

happy pride month<3

Jerry plot: I want to fuck this girl but I forgot the name of her dog.

George plot: Steinmeier wants me to bring peace to the middle east or I'll get fired!

Kramer plot:

i want to caption this as "george costanza haunted by the spectre of male/male sexuality" but i think people would take it as a Funny Tumblr Joke and i need you to know that that is canonically the context of this image

Me remembering Undertale

Sins Being Neutered By People Who Don't Understand Sins

The embodiment of lust caring about consent and the embodiment of gluttony caring about self-control is the adult equivalent of this.

Thomas gets bullied :(

Issokay, he tattled on Muscle Man to his beloved latina short fat gf 🐱

here's a compilation of Every FreakTV Bumper That I've Made, in chronological order of creation, along with titles and reviews of them.

FreakTV is a fake TV channel my friends and i created to be used as a discord bot that streamed randomly selected episodes from our favorite TV shows, 24/7, in a dedicated channel. between each aired episode there was a "coming up next" break, and one of hundreds of bumpers that all of us created over time

bonus: here's all the freaktv logos that i personally made!

this is going to sound simplistic + i promise you it's not: stop following people whose entire schtick is being cruel or fighting with others online. even if the ppl deserve it! even if it's not a ~problematic~ cruelty! even if you agree with all of that blog's opinions!

it's one thing if someone snaps back when provoked or posts the occasional "get a load of this guy". nobody needs to play up respectability for people who haven't given them respect in return. but if someone's online identity centers around being needlessly mean for laughs + they're constantly seeking out socially acceptable, easy targets for petty cruelty, that's a red flag. there's a huge difference between not taking shit/cracking a joke + mocking others as your several-hours-a-day hobby.

especially if, when they are inevitably in the wrong + mocking someone mercilessly to their 50k followers over something petty goes south (shocking!), they become extremely defensive or block everyone or play the victim or dismiss it as "well, how was i supposed to know they were autistic? i'm autistic + i don't meow in public" or whatever.

this isn't a "well i knew all along" post bcuz nobody should be shamed for being in the dark about something like this but many of the popular bloggers who have later been exposed for serious harassment or abuse should not have shocked us. if someone's blog is 90% shit like "you should light yourself on fire because you watch x anime" or "look at this so-called lesbian bitch + her ugly fucking boyfriend at a kink convention- it's giving drowned rats", should it really shock you that they are also being cruel or abusive in less internet-acceptable ways? if they've already shown you that they get a such a thrill out of being vicious that they do it daily + are regularly rewarded with thousands of followers?

This goes for communities/social circles as well. The occasional group bitching session is fine and healthy. But if one of the central purposes or activities of the community is seeking out things to be mad at or dunk on, that's a major red flag.