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#pumpkin the cat – @sing-you-fools on Tumblr
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i'll defy the laws of nature and come out alive

@sing-you-fools

Rhye ✨️ any pronouns except she ✨️ 30s ✨️ original thoughts here ✨️ reblogs @theglamourswornthin ✨️ art @getsketched
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reblogged

it's fucking

FINISHED

now i just have to wear it all the time forever to make sure that i die in it so when my ghost meets Freddie's ghost he'll be like "cool vest"

CATS VEST IS DEAD

Unfortunately, the above vest was murdered by the dry cleaner. It's dry clean only, and I was using dryel, but putting it in the dryer was making it pill so I thought I'd try something else. They made me sign a waiver first and I spent a few minutes going "okay you painted it once you can do it again if it gets fucked up" before I handed it over. In the future, I will use dryel and just shave it occasionally.

I have now redone it and it came out so much better this time! The camera doesn't really capture the difference in quality as much as I'd like but I still have to show it off. At the very least, Punky's eyes are in the right place this time.

LONG LIVE CATS VEST

and maybe Freddie's ghost will be wearing his vest with all his cats painted on it and I'll be like "hey we should be vesties!" and he'll be like "what." and I'll be like "you know, like besties, but vests!" and he'll be like "...no." and I'll start singing "you're my vest friend" and he'll be like "I never wanna see you again." will the puns have been worth ruining my chance at a post-death friendship with Freddie Mercury? I'll never know but I can't stop myself

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playing fetch with dogs is great because it's like. you're outside. in your backyard, perhaps at a park. and you throw a ball or stick or something and the dog runs off and comes back and it's so happy. you do that some number of times and then go back to inside where fetch does not happen but that's okay because doggy just had the best day of his life. just like every day he gets to play fetch.

playing fetch with cats is great because it's like. you have this new kitten and look a toy! it's a toy mouse! here! and you throw the toy mouse and awwwww she brought it back! so cute! so you throw it again and she does it again and you're like OH WOW YOU PLAY FETCH WOW THIS IS AMAZING! and it's so cute and so exciting! and then when you're making dinner she brings you mice and screams and when you're folding laundry she brings you mice and screams and once you were sleeping and you rolled over onto a mouse and tossed it out of the bed not knowing she was in the room and now every morning you wake up and find five mice in your bed and you're in one room and your person is in another and the kitty invents double fetch so she can fetch with both of you at the same time and you're rushing to get your shoes on and get out the door because you're late for work but your kitty keeps bringing you mice and screaming it never ends! you understand one word in cat language and it translates to "throw the mouse, peasant" and you can't really argue because it takes a quarter of a second but you're doing this forever!

dogs are well-known for their ability to fetch but what they don't tell you is that when cats make fetch happen that is a permanent game that you will never, ever be free from! at least with The Game you can go read that one xkcd strip that frees you but not fetch! not with a cat!

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soracities

genuinely cant stop thinking about whatever early human first looked a literal wolf full in the face and thought domestication would be fun but ALSO cant stop thinking about the ENTIRE early human tribe that absolutely did NOT think to stop them

HOLD THE PHONE

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tuulikki

Slightly related: I read a book by Rick McIntyre, who was official Wolf Guy at Yellowstone Park for 25 years (and studied wolves for 40 yrs total). He describes how, when they’re alone, wolves—both adults and pups—will pick up sticks or bones or bits of animal skin and toss them around to entertain themselves, the way you might toss a ball up and down. They essentially play catch by themselves.

So if wolves do this by themselves, in nature, that means that we saw them playing this game and thought “huh, that wolf enjoys fetching the stick it’s throwing for itself, maybe I could throw it further and it would like that more?” And thus began our two species’ mutual favourite game to play together

But the point is that they invented fetch

they made fetch happen

as someone with a cat who plays fetch, this doesn't surprise me at all. people assume we taught her to. no. we tossed a mouse to her and she brought it back over and screamed until we threw it again. she has even invented a game we call "double fetch" where there's a person in each of two adjacent rooms and she brings the mouse to one of us and screams until we throw it into the next room, chases it, and brings it to the person in there to scream at them. back and forth, over and over.

and she is always trying to make fetch happen.

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WANTED!!!!!

for the crime of stealing a chicken nugget off the table, dropping it at my feet, and meowing at me to play fetch with her

PUMPKIN [🎶Killer Queen🎶] THE CAT

(her middle name is the song Killer Queen in case that wasn't clear)

Aliases: Punky, Punky Butt, Punky Muffy Fluffy Puffy, Punx, Tenement Punxter, Baby, Orangest Cat

Known Relations:

  • Ghost [🎶I Want To Break Free🎶] The Cat (Aliases: Ghostie Ghost who Meows the Most, The Supervisor, Ghostie GHOOOOOST, Sweetie): Sister
  • Bat [🎶We Will Rock You🎶] The Cat (Aliases: Lil Bat the Fluffy Cat, Snuggliest Boi, Orangest Cat [Derogatory], My Idiot Son): Brother
  • Zoombini [🎶Fat Bottomed Girls🎶] The Cat (Aliases: Zoom, Zoomy, ZoomyZoom, Zoomcat, The Zoomcat, Stop Eating The Kittens' Food): Adopted aunt who hates her, sort of a Count Olaf situation but that the kittens have no fortune

THIS CAT HAS A HISTORY OF CRIME AND MISDEEDS. She might chew on you if you pick her up but she tries to be gentle. She is very cute and snuggly and that is why she gets away with it all. She will be getting away with this too I just want her to come back so I can take a picture of her with the nugget

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QUEEN FANDOM (and any others who feel like providing input) I NEED YOUR HELP

I have a vest I will be painting my cats on very soon. I am, unfortunately, indecisive as fuck, and cannot make up my mind on how to arrange them.

The drawings are based on my best personality pic for each cat. Ghostie Ghost who Meows the Most is staying in Freddie's spot for obvious reasons, and Zoomy, as the adult who does not approve of any of the kitten nonsense going on, I feel firmly belongs in Brian's. Things get trickier with Punky (looks most evil) and Bat (sticking tongue out).

Arrangement 1, I think, works best with the angling of their heads in the pictures I have. Arrangement 2 would be a better fit in terms of matching them personality-wise to the band members - Bat is sweet and shy, and Punky's love language is biting. It also gives me the benefit of Punky and Zoomy's ears not looking too similar, but I can't help feeling like Freddie would tell me not to flip my cats around for these fuckers (or something). Arrangement 3 keeps them aligned by personality without flipping their images, I just don't like it quite as much.

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reblogged

super quick doodle of Ghostie Ghost Who Meows the Most to motivate myself to work on the painting i'm in the middle of so i can get to my next project

(she really is this cute)

ZOOMBINI

(if she looks cranky it's because she's an old lady used to being alone and we went and adopted three babies out of nowhere)

BATFACE

PUNKY

the light where i'm sitting seems ideal for photographing pencil sketches! yay! unfortunately Punky came out slightly smaller than the others, which will make the next step slightly more complicated. but only slightly. in theory.

i can tell from looking at them that i spent progressively more time on each one. mostly because the expressions got harder to capture. Ghostie was so simple!

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hyrude

i love to learn about my cat i love to google “should you trim cat last claw? trim all cat claws? cat last claw called? cat fifth claw? cat claws labelled. trim cat dew claw?” and then say hi graham i learned something about you! your weird claw is called a dew claw and it will not be worn down by regular walking so it is extra important to be diligent about trimming to prevent it growing into your paw pad! and he bites me and bites me

i wish graham could google. maybe he’d google “human skin thickness? humans skin cut bite? humans red line arm leg? how hard bite humans? human pain tolerance? human vs kittens safe play” and then he would say mads im so sorry i didnt realize that humans are prone to injury from skin punctures. we should engage in remote play through means of toys as you were suggesting

punky plays fetch which is very nice remote play through means of toys exactly as suggested above except when she decides to play no take only throw she does so by putting the mouse down next to us and staring at us in anticipation and then as soon as we go to pick up the mouse she gently rakes her claws down our hand then goes back to staring like come on throw it so we're like yeah okay and go to grab it again and again she rakes us and she is gentle yes she knows not to rake too hard not to bite too hard when she turns us into a chew toy but she does not understand dry skin and that even the gentlest raking of claws will bring the telltale red beading of the bleeding she's inflicting she tries so hard to be gentle with us fragile beasts that we are but she does not understand how. i too wish she could

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the water in our town is extremely nasty so we have one of those jug dispenser things. the triplets are fascinsted. every time we go to get water they're there. waiting. they know before we do where we're going. they're sticking their heads in the way trying to get the water first. they're licking the spout it comes from afterward. my husband said enough and got them a hamster bottle.

so now we know that cats can use a hamster bottle.

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