so after almost a week of anxious depression and bad food choices, I actually wrote another page for my bachelor thesis so now we’re at one and a half pages now and I know that’s nothing to brag about but hell I’m still gonna brag about it
procrasti-baked vegan scones today but I might have improvised a little too much because for some reason they taste like Spritzgebäck (which I’m only now learning is a german thing with no English name? It’s a kind of christmas cookie that’s kinda flour-y but in a good way)
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dietcoke-and-razorblades
some days im like “i havent eaten in 19 hours and im feelin fine”
and then some days im like “im on my ninth muffin and only the power of god can stop me”
Dear UK,
WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH UR CANDY I CAN’T
Sincerely,
Someone who’s probably going to leave this country with a cavity next year and whose tongue just became numb after a very bad live choice involving an entire box of Reese’s Pieces, which walk a very close line between disgusting and addicting.
An eating disorder smells like
freshly brewed coffee and hot plum pie.
An eating disorder tastes like
apple vinegar and endless gulps of green tea.
An eating disorder sounds like
unwrapping candy bars and vomit splashing in a toilet bowl.
An eating disorder looks like
childhood obesity and too large sweaters on bodies that are numb inside.
An eating disorder feels like
stomach cramps and drowning in maple syrup.
Sweet, slow death.
What is an Eating Disorder?
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This is it. This is modern paganism.
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If you think you’ve hit rock bottom, just remember that my bank once froze my accounts because I bought a healthy ready meal at my local supermarket and they classed it an ‘uncharacteristic purchase’
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Priorities are often in a state of flux, you see.
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Journaling my feelings and ED thoughts when my depression is really bad like
feeling this tonight
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^having an eating disorder be like
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Planning a historical trip to Paris
In case I decide to go in the summer, I’m working out a plan Anything you can suggest?
Already on the list
Notre Dame
Pont au change
Luxemborg gardens
Latin Quarter
Versialles (maybe?)
The Sewer Museum in Paris?:D
…look, I’d want to see the Sewer Museum. Sewers are cool.
Okay, so...
- Versailles is really great, especially the gardens you should def. visit if you have enough time!
- Also the maison de Victor Hugo should be of interest to you, given your url.
- If you’re into architecture and/or churches, I can recommend “La Madeleine” (has the most gorgous altar I’ve ever seen) and of course “Sacre Couer” (it’s on the Montmatre so you’ve also got a great view.)
- Then there’s the “Panthéon” where many famous french people (Including Hugo, Dumas and Voltaire) are burried.
- Bonus: If you’ve got money to spare (expensive!) and don’t mind seeing naked ladies you could go to the Moulin Rouge and have dinner and a show there.
I’ve been cooking my own food for 8 years and I still just managed to fuck up a hardboiled-egg.
Imagine if you will the Scarecrow pulling off some heist and there are hostages and everything is chaos and this young person breaks down crying (before Jonathan even gets a chance to fear gas them) not because they find themselves in this horrible position but because it’s finals week and they studied so hard and didn’t get proper sleep in days and their bloodstream is 90% coffee and 10% energy drinks by now and they will miss the exam because of this, and Jonathan is about to tell them to get it together when they mention the name of their professor and Jonathan recognices a former, in his opinion completely inept colleague and that’s the story of how Jonathan Crane dropped everything and drove a psychology major back to university while ranting about those idiots ruining his students.
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Things I’ve Seen During Finals
- Someone calling in sick to work in order to sleep for their hour long shift.
- Someone breakdancing to a boombox blasting Christmas music on the quad.
- Someone crying because they got a free sandwich.
- Someone walking into the lounge at 1 am with a huge stack of books, and the determination of someone who forgot a term paper.
- Someone putting off writing their thesis because someone else needed math help and “logarithms are fun!”
- Someone taking a lighter to a notebook as soon as they left the science building.
- More than one flask being carried to class.
- Someone literally giggle evilly when given a 6-pack of beer.
- A freshman taking gen eds complaining about everyone else complaining about how hard finals are. (Note: the freshman may or may not have ever been seen again.)
- Someone crossing campus at a run in slippers.
- A nursing major explaining that finals are actually natural selection, and that she is the strongest and most adaptable and she was going to survive, while talking to herself.
- A different nursing major looking very forlorn because she just ran out of wine.
- Someone sleeping on a bench in the music building, with actual pillows and blankets and everything.
- Sticky notes with swearwords written on them littered around the science building.
- A group of students trying to one-up each other about how badly their juries had just gone.
- Someone leaving for the library at 3 am, because there was free coffee there.
- Someone flipping off the professor after being wished good luck on the final.
- The same person realizing that they have an entire lifetime of that class ahead of them, because it’s their major.
- Someone being questioned about how they wanted their funeral to look, after talking about the 8000 words they had due.
- Just, so many people sprawled on floors because it’s easier to do that than anything else. So many.
- The most genuine gratitude I’ve had directed at me possibly ever, because I gave someone a peanut butter cookie.
Finals: we’re all tired, hungry, and a little unhinged. It’s okay.
Me comming back to uni after Christmas break: It is I, your local Frisian, adorned with beverages and treats of my people who would not let me go back to your sorry land without proper licorice!
@literallykittypryde tagged and I enjoyed it greatly. Everyone who wants to do it as well can herewith consider themeselves tagged.
- Last movie you watched? Star Wars: The Force Awakens
- Last song you listened to? I’m not quit sure tbh- I sat on a bus for 6 hours it all starts to blend together... the last think I remember is “Pain” by Three Days Grace
- Last show you watched? Pokemon
- Last book you read? Jane Eyre
- Last thing you ate? Cherry
- If you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be? I would have to remain here because boring real life reasons and uni homework. :P But if I could just escape all of that I’d be in an expensive hotelroom in Rome. (My, for someone without money I’ve got quite the luxuary kink don’t I? ;)
- If you could pick a date to travel back in time to, when would it be? 18.02.1894 or 15.05.1862
- If you won millions of dollars in the lottery, what would you spend it on? I would probably save most of it (because me and my money issues can’t enjoy good things) and donate a small amount. And I would treat myself with tickets to Tanz der Vampire in Berlin.
- Which fictional character would you like to hang out with for the day? How am I even supposed to choose a single one? Right now, I would pick Edward Nygma (the riddler from batman). We would probably annoy the hell out of each other but it would be worth it.
- 10What was the last fandom you joined? Frankenstein. My gay goth babes.