Bones: results are in! Looks like you have a minor STD - nothing some modified antibodies can't fix. We'll have you good as new in a couple days.
Kirk: thank you, Bones. And I'm sorry to make you waste your time on me. I should be more careful.
Bones: mhm-mhm. It's a very common pathogen.
Kirk: oh?
Bones: yes. Doctor M'Benga tells me 42.36% of Vulcans have it. It lays dormant on their skin and is harmless to them, but causes disease when coming in contact with a human.
Kirk: ...
Bones: do you have something to tell me, Jim?
Kirk: ...
Bones: Jim?