I believe everything should be offline, I believe that every time something that is not your internet browser (and I'm being generous here) should have a big red alert that says THIS PIECE OF SHIT PROGRAM NEEDS TO CONNECT TO THE INTERNET AND REQUESTS YOUR CONSENT TO DO THIS SPECIFIC THING, and you had to touch a big red button and it would disconnect as soon as you close it.

"oh you can't edit this document on your device :) you need to save it to the Google Panopticon first :)" "Adobe needs to update on the background sorry we'll just steal your RAM for a bit :) you don't need to notice don't open the task manager your so sexy ahaha" "Windows needs to be online to send everything you do... somewhere"

IN MY TIME Microsoft Word had to ask permission to even put an hyperlink, let alone fucking update in the background. Videogames had to BEG to connect to a LAN network, now Gabe Newell gives any dev the power to install whatever the fuck in my hard drive.

Computers used to know RESPECT, now they're all assholes who want access to your contact list.

Getting a new computer soon. Where’s that windows debloat guide people post every so often

https://github.com/Raphire/Win11Debloat

This one?

YES THANK YOU

we have already. They don't know exactly what is up with it, other than the sweat being slightly more acidic than normal and the acidic mantle being thicker and Way more acidic than normal, but it doesn't seem to have anything to do with acidosis. As far as we have tested, our family has had this since at least my great grandpa, and the guy lived to be 93 years old.

What the fuck.

op is a xenomorph descendant from that one time ripley fucked the queen

Because in its younger days it used to have RGB lights:

Some of them still work, when they want:

Though I've long forgotten how to change the color settings

NEVERMIND I JUST REMEMBERED HOW

Imagine trying to claim op is wasteful for using a plastic keyboard after they show off something that looks like it belongs at Old Friends Senior Keyboard Sanctuary.

Hey! OP here! I had no idea this post was still circulating after my old blog got terminated (two or three times, I lost count)! Guess what?

10 years and still going strong! Got rid of the rest of the paint on top of the keys too.

3d printed start gate

I need to share how the IT guy at work greeted my department on CrowdStrike Blue Screen Friday. Never have I seen a man so shocked by the sight of perfectly functional computers

(They were off during the update)

Never have I ever seen a more compelling reason to turn off my work computer when I leave.

Brooch with hand forged fine silver lily of the valey flowers on a sterling stem. The leaf is a polished and sealed circuit board inlaid with opals.

Shopping for laptops fucking sucks ‘cause I don’t know shit about computers. I’ve never had a computer with a functional webcam or microphone or the ability to play computer games made later than 2005 or a speaker that could play anything loud enough to hear from more than a foot away. How the hell should I know what I want?!

wow that would be such useful advice if only desktop PCs were small and portable and did not require desk tops on which to place them and I could take them with me when I traveled

I know this is a haha funny post, but for anyone who needs it, here's a quick-and-dirty of what you're most likely going to see while shopping for a computer/laptop (w/Examples)!

*HDD is cheaper and more storage while SSD is faster, more durable, and uses less energy.

Ex. A computer with 4GB of RAM will probably shit itself if you try to play a game with with the internet open.

Also the “avoid refurbished computers” tip is dead wrong.

‘Refurbished’ means it’s been in a technician’s hands recently and can’t be sold as new. That’s it. That’s all. In the US the FTC makes it illegal to sell something new if it’s been sold to an end user, so by definition a lot of perfect, ready-to-go hardware must be ‘refurbished’ in order to sell it again, no matter the circumstances.

Reasons a machine might be a refurb:

- Customer bought the item, decided they didn’t like the color, and returned it

- Customer bought the item, couldn’t figure out how to turn it on, and returned it

- Retailer opened the box for some reason and lost some of what gets shipped inside (manuals, cables, charger) and returned it

- Company bought 100 computers but went out of business before they could be installed or used

- Customer got a replacement for a damaged computer under warranty, and the manufacturer fixed what was wrong with the old machine and is now selling it as a refurb

I HAVE PERSONALLY WITNESSED ALL OF THESE SCENARIOS

Bottom line: ‘refurbished’ hardware has been repaired, tested, cleaned, and renewed back to original specifications by a trained technician. If anything, it’s probably MORE reliable now that it’s been doubly-tested. 

All responsibly refurbished equipment comes with a factory warranty... the only refurbs I would avoid are items sold ‘as-is’ without warranty. That’s dangerous unless you know what you’re doing, like buying stuff for parts.

A lot of my most reliable hardware -- servers, laptops, tablets -- were bought as refurbished goods at huge savings. When I go shopping for a new thing I always look at the refurbished options first. 

tl;dr: Refurbished is great!

This helped me recently and you might need it as well :)

https://twitter.com/shannonvallor/status/1559659655097376768

ALT

View on Twitter

I can’t tell you where the switchover was for me, but there is very much no longer a feeling of “How can this change/improve my life?” and a constant dread of “How will this complicate things as I try to maintain privacy and sanity in a world that demands I have this thing to operate”.

Opening Task Manager to scare the programs into behaving again

if wired headphones has a million fans i am one of them . if wired headphones has ten fans i am one of them . if wired headphones have onw fan that is me . if the world is against wired headphones i an against the world ........... ..

*proceeds to shake it like a polaroid picture*

wtf no green onion emoji.. world has gone to shit

@satistimes

if i had three wishes they would all be to make web 2.0 utterly illegal and go back to normal html

how do we explain to children that all our tech briefly worked perfectly and over time we threw it all away for sleek menus and corporate opacity

“we could give you a link to this mp3 OR we could run it in a proprietary player app that must connect to the internet every time you hit the resume button”

when i upgraded from a flip phone to an iphone and realized i could no longer record and set a custom ringtone because apple wanted me to buy radio pop ringtones, i realized, oh cool new tech isnt made for us it’s made to exploit us and we are going to let it happen

@tron

Fuck.

Look, if you’re going to make me use a key card to tap into a secure room it better be as extra as this. No excuses.